19 Times Tumblr Users Reported Back From the Real World

Tumblr steps out into the real world with hilarious results…

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More Times Tumblr Reported Back From the Real World–>

30 responses to 19 Times Tumblr Users Reported Back From the Real World

  1. Laughing gas for a cavity? I only ever get numbing gel. They didn’t even give me laughing gas when one of my teeth broke in half and the dentist had never seen a tooth break exactly that way before so spent like two hours figuring out what to do.

    Also JFC it’s bad enough when tumblr stories have that “crESCENDO CAPITALIZATION”, but WTF with that last one randomly being lowercase for two letters? How do you accidentally type out “STorRY”? And why would you intentionally type out “STorRY”?

    Tumblr is like an ass wart, I swear.

    1. I had a former employer who admitted to being terrified of anything probing inside his mouth. He went to the dentist only when absolutely necessary, and would opt to be put under whenever it was an option. He and his dentist had an understanding, so it’s possible he was unconscious for ordinary exams.

      Interestingly, this man’s father apparently also had a serious aversion to dentists, but not of dental work, per se. He had comprehensive dental insurance, but when he had an abscess tooth, he elected to drink a bunch of whiskey and pull it out with a pair of pliers instead of just making an appointment with a doctor.

      1. I’ve got a high tolerance to pain (from having a broken spine and having to take morphine most days) but I am TERRIFIED of the dentist. I’ve currently got 2 missing fillings that I’ve been putting off having to do anything with for over a year and a half.

        If I even go for an examination I’m going to need to be sedated or put under entirely.

    2. Tumblr user here: speech in crescendo like that is used for effect, such as fluctuating voice or increasingly loud volume. It’s a strange, but oddly effective way to communicate that you’re excitedly and animatedly saying something (or alternatively, becoming more and more horrified).
      As for the two lowercase letters, I’m guessing they just mashed their caps lock randomly.

    3. some people have lower tolerances for pain. I am one of them and have had to had laughing gas for a cleaning – a clEANING!

    4. my mind just sang “STorRY” like in the Neverending Story song:

      “… the neverending stoooOOORY”

      i’ll bet that was what was going through his hungover mind as he typed that StorRY

  2. The opposite of the last one happened to me too. My husband told me he wanted a McDouble (I don’t drink coffee but my inlaws all drink Double Doubles from Tim’s when I get it for them) so I went to the counter and asked for a large coffee and brought it back to my husband and he’s like what’s this for. He was very upset I didn’t get his burger so I had to go back up and get it

    1. There are 2 kids named Roy in the same class. One of them is the author of this story. He needs hearing aids in order to hear. The other one was listening to music on earbuds, which is not allowed, so the professor said “Roy, take those things out of your ear,” not specifying which Roy or which “things”. So the author of the story sarcastically removed his hearing aids, as though the professor had been telling him he had to take them out of his ear.

      1. One time I had another kid named Bob in my class and my brother was moved to my class. It immediately went South. Every time the teacher called out Bob/Smith both of us would answer, and when she tried to correct by calling out “I meant Smith” my brother/friend and I would respond no matter how obvious it was who she was talking to.
        She said the joke got old real fast. The three of us disagreed.

      2. Used to work closely in a department with a guy with the same name as me. The boss had a really heavy squint. It led to some very awkward situation, I can tell you. After a while, and quite naturally, we eventually never stood too close together when he was talking to us. We’d even instinctively drift apart if caught off guard.

    2. And if you really stretch and mess up the articulation it then it becomes a pun
      That’s so what Roy would do.
      That’s so Roy
      So Roy
      Sorry.

  3. Next time you go to McDonald’s order “A McDouble with only cheese, lettuce, pickles, onions, and BigMac Sauce.”

    Boom! You just got a Big Mac for $1.50!

    You’re welcome.

  4. The vet one….I work at a high volume spay/neuter clinic. This girl shows up for her appointment and didn’t bring her dogs with her. She didn’t forget them, she just didn’t know she was supposed to bring them. She had to go home and get them. I didn’t know what to say, I think I was just staring at her because I was pretty much speechless. She kinda looked like a tweaker so I’m guessing that was why her brain was defective. It was just so baffling, what did she think she was coming to do?
    Too bad we couldn’t spay her!

    1. Every few months someone shows up to triage at my ER and acts surprised that I have to actually see the patient to triage them. They think if they just explain the situation, their friend can sit comfortably in the waiting room. We have folks that call too, wanting the doc to phone in prescriptions, because they are too sick to come in. Stupid is universal.

  5. The first one: I get accidentally saying “you too” or “I love you” out of habit.

    How does one accidentally say “they sure are handsome little boys?” How does that phrase just accidentally pop out? OP has either the weirdest tourette’s or a bizarre line of work.

  6. The plum one…there are actually these yellow plums that exist and they are banned in U.S. Tumblr user wasn’t lying after all

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