The United States of Shame (CHART)

Whether it’s a fat population, high rate of STDs or excessive tax rate, it turns out that every state ranks dead last in at least one unsavory category. Check out the map (click image to enlarge) to see what your state is the worst at, then review additional stats and references after the jump:

Rationale and statistics:

Most stats taken from and (unless otherwise noted)

1. Alabama: highest rate of stroke (3.8 percent) (tied with Oklahoma)

2. Alaska: highest suicide rate (23.6 suicides per 100,000 people in 2004)

3. Arizona: highest rate of alcoholism

4. Arkansas: worst average credit score (636)

5. California: most air pollution (15.2 micrograms per cubic meter)

6. Colorado: highest rate of cocaine use per capita (3.9 percent total population)

7. Connecticut: highest rate of breast cancer

8. Delaware: highest abortion rate (27 per 1,000 women aged 15 to 44)

9. Florida: highest rate of identity theft (122.3 reports per 100,000 people)

10. Georgia: sickly based on highest rate of influenza

11. Hawaii –highest cost of living (tied with California)

12. Idaho – lowest level of Congressional clout

13. Illinois: highest rate of robbery (284.7 incidences per 100,000 people)

14. Indiana: rated the most environmentally unfriendly by NMI solutions

15. Iowa: highest percentage of people age 85 and older (1.8 percent) (tied with three other states)

16. Kansas: poorest health based on highest average number of limited activity days per month (3.5 days)

17. Kentucky: most cancer deaths (227 per 100,000 people) (BONUS fact: Kentucky also has the highest rate of tobacco smokers – 25.6 percent)

18. Louisiana: highest rate of gonorrhea (264.4 reported cases per 100,000 people)

19. Maine: dumbest state claim based on lowest average SAT score (1389)

20. Maryland: highest rate of AIDS diagnosis (27.6 people per 100,000 people)

21. Massachusetts: worst drivers claim based on highest rate of auto accidents

22. Michigan: highest unemployment rate (13.6 percent)

23. Minnesota: highest number of reported tornadoes (123 in 2010)

24. Mississippi: highest rate of obesity (35.3 percent of total population)

BONUS facts: Mississippi ranks last in the most number of categories. These include highest rate of child poverty (31.9 percent), highest rate of infant mortality (10.3 percent) lowest median household income ($35,078), highest teen birth rate (71.9 per 1,000 women aged 15 to 19) and highest overall rate of STDs.

25. Missouri: highest rate of bankruptcy (700 out of every 100,000 people)

26. Montana: highest rate of drunk driving deaths (1.12 deaths per 100 million miles driven)

27. Nebraska: highest rate of women murdered annually

28. Nevada: highest rate violent crime (702.2 offenses per 100,000 people). BONUS fact: Nevada also has the highest rate of foreclosure (one in 99 houses)

29. New Hampshire: highest rate of corporate taxes

30. New Jersey: highest rate of citizen taxation (11.8 percent)

31. New Mexico: antisocial claim based on lowest ranking in social heath policies

32. New York: longest average daily commute (30.6 minutes)

33. North Carolina: lowest average teacher salary

34. North Dakota: ranked last in ugliest residents report as chosen by The Daily Beast

35. Ohio: nerdiest state claim based on highest number of library visits per capita (6.9)

36. Oklahoma: highest rate of female incarceration

37. Oregon: highest rate of long-term homeless people

38. Pennsylvania: highest rate of arson deaths (55.56 annually)

39. Rhode Island: highest rate of illicit drug use (12.5 percent of population)

40. South Carolina: highest percentage of mobile homes (18.8 percent)

41. South Dakota: highest rate of forcible rape 76.5 per 100,000

42. Tennessee: chosen most corrupt state by The Daily Beast

43. Texas: lowest high school graduation rate (78.3 percent)

44. Utah: highest rate of of online porn subscriptions

45. Vermont: infertility claim based on lowest birth rate of any state (10.6 births per 1,000) (tied with Maine)

46. Virginia: highest number of alcohol-related motorcyle deaths

47. Washington: most cases of bestiality (4 reported in 2010)

48. West Virginia: highest rate of heart attack (6.5 percent of population)

49. Wisconsin: highest rate of binge drinking (23.2 percent of population)

50. Wyoming: highest rate of deadly car crashes (24.6 deaths per 100,000)


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408 Responses to The United States of Shame (CHART)

  1. Lanna says:

    What about DC? Since Virginia’s and Maryland’s statistics don’t cover our nation’s capital, what is its worst feature? I’d love to know…

  2. Benny the Icepick says:

    //New Mexico: antisocial claim based on lowest ranking in social heath policies//
    Wait a sec… so our lousy economy, poor public health plans, and egregious disparity between the wealthy and the poor makes us “anti-social?”

    Does not compute. Sure, we rank in the bottom ten on most things, but anti-social is the last descriptor I would use for New Mexico, especially as a word used to describe economic policies.

    • Anasazi says:

      Yeah. We should have been listed as Driest State: Technically NM has less water area than even Arizona.

      Or why not listed as most non-English speakers at home?

      We are not anti-social.

      • R says:

        There you go: “The most non-English speakers. There’s your answer for the anti-social tag, even it’s an unintentional consequence of people not knowing English, and thus being unable to be social with the native population! ;>

        • jimmyjoejoejr says:

          Right, because english speakers are the native population of New Mexico.

          You must be from Maine, my friend.

          • Heikki says:

            Maine has the lowest SAT score in part because a higher rate of Maine high school students take the test than do students in other states. The state uses the test as a graduation requirement; therefore, a large number of students not planning on attending a post-secondary institution take the test, presumably scoring lower than college-bound seniors.

      • E says:

        “Anti-social” for New Mexico doesn’t make any sense, especially after looking at the link provided as rationale for this label.

        Now if the link had directed to some sort of treatise on the preference of the average New Mexican to maintain a minimum 1 foot personal space bubble… anti-social would make sense.

        I live in Kentucky but I’m from New Mexico. I still have a lot of close friends in and from New Mexico but I barely have any friends in or from Kentucky. So much for “southern hospitality.” Maybe it’s because they’re all dying of cancer or maybe I bristle with hostility when persons of an unknown quantity get within eight inches of my person for no good reason.

        • salem says:

          Being a native New Mexican (and having lived in several NM towns, including Albuquerque and Las Cruces), I will certainly vouch for New Mexico’s anti-social status, even if not as defined by the social programs. New Mexicans, in general, are self-important individualists. They are concerned with number one and the status that number one can reach as compared to everyone else. There is no sense of community in any of New Mexico’s “communities.” New Mexicans, by and large, compete with each other, instead of cooperate. It’s kind of a drag.

          Having also lived in many other place in the US, I have the experience to suggest that NM is one of the least friendly places in the lower 48, with the exception of some states on the East Coast.

      • T says:

        I didn’t understand it either. I ALWAYS view antisocial as “violating the rights of others” and not the whole I don’t want to hang out with you (because that is schizoid behavior in the DSM-IV-TR).

        But some criminologists try to say that poor economic conditions result in more criminal behavior and criminal behavior is antisocial behavior.

    • Blogengeezer says:

      Has anyone noticed that the states that ‘Receive’ more federal taxpayer’s funding than they ‘contribute’, are the lowest ranking in so many Social attributes? Primarily every individual is ‘Dependent’ and exists for generations as a form of reliance on government subsidizing (totally funding) their way of life. Predictable how they all vote… A ‘good’ education easily gives one a superior position above the poorly educated, lowly masses. It is difficult to attain this advantage in more competitive, well educated demographics. a series of ‘Carpet Bag’ governors know of this historic social weakness in NM mentality, all too well.
      NM does have a pleasant climate, lots of sunshine and Extremely interesting Geology. Most urban dwellers are non-native.

      • Benny the Icepick says:

        For what its worth, most of the federal money NM receives does not go towards social programs or education, but rather towards military installations and the contractors that support them.

  3. B. Pressley says:

    To my knowledge, Maine is the only state that requires every student to take the SAT. This means that in other states, only students interested in going to college take the test. Maine students must take the exam whether they want to or not. You can’t compare students who took the test voluntarily with students who are forced to take the test. Better to ding the state for high levels of people without insurance or one of the highest death rates from Mesothelioma.

    • CMYK says:

      Illinois students are also required to take the SAT whether or not they want to go to college. It’s part of the state’s standardized testing regimen. Or at least it was in 2003, when I was in high school.

      • Lucy says:

        The SAT has NEVER been part of Illinois’ required testing regime, including in 2003. About 6% of students in the state even take the test, according to the Illinois board of education….

    • miah says:

      actually you can, a larger sample population doesn’t magically invalidate a statistic: it’s a statistic. As in an average. Your statement seems to assume that stupid people don’t want to go to college, that’s just… asinine.

      • B. Pressley says:

        As someone who proctors the exam year after year, the only thing I assume is that kids who are MADE to take the exam, who are generally mad that they have to take long test on a Saturday, instead of doing something they would rather be doing, don’t try very hard to do a good job. The only assumption made about whether or not people might be stupid was made by you. Since this is generally a test for people who want to go to college, I think it was somewhat safe to assume in states where it is not required, the people taking it were thinking about going to college. AND, they aren’t just increasing the sample size, they are CHANGING the sample group. In almost all other states it is voluntary (self-selected), in Maine, students who are actively opposed to taking the test are lumped in with the voluntary students. If you look at Maine’s SAT scores across the last 10 years, they have generally been well above the national average, and took a huge drop the year all students were MADE to take the test.

      • B. Pressley says:

        Also, the College Board websites says the average SAT score for college-bound students from Maine is actually 1509. Huh. Turns out when you only use college-bound students, the average does go up.

      • Anonymous says:

        I don’t think it is a fair statistic, because Maine is known for their good schools.
        However, many people in Maine do not see use in college and often choose to go into the line of work that their parents do, which consists of such things as working in blueberry fields, which requires no higher education, thusly taking the SAT is not important to them.

      • Pox says:

        You must be from Maine.

      • b says:

        The problem wouldn’t be a larger sample, it’d be that other states have a skewed sample – college-bound students are not a representative sample of the entire population. In general they have higher grades and higher test scores than the total population, so of course they’d also have higher SAT scores.

    • If you don't know, look it up. says:

      Upon doing research, I found that the SAT is not required in any state. The ACT is. Colorado, Illinois, Michigan, Kentucky, Tennessee, and Wyoming all require high school students to take the ACT even if they are not college bound. Other states require one of the two be taken. A statistic is just a statistic. It is an average of the information given.

    • Rae T. says:

      You make a good point, B. Pressley. The state with the highest SAT scores, Iowa, which I presume by the line of thinking that went into this map must make it the smartest state, sees only a small percentage of its high school students take the SATs. In fact, one statistic I saw said only 3% of Iowa high school students take it. This is in contrast to 92% of Maine high school students taking it. Going so far as to declare Maine dumbest based on a failure to take this differential into account is in itself, well, pretty dumb. In fact, I suspect several of these state rankings on the map could be shot down with even minimal research. North Dakotans the ugliest? How does one determine that?

    • johnny golecki says:

      It is not a requirement. dumbass

  4. Michelle says:

    Wouldnt it be that each state ranked the highest in all these bad things? Tennessee is “worst” at a rankings of corruption. So wouldnt that mean they’re the least corrupted? You might want to rephrase this.

  5. Alexa says:

    IC I’m going to stay out of South Dakota and Nebraska then. But I can’t help but laugh at Utah’s porn consumption. What good and Godly people those Mormons are!

    • mike says:

      well Joseph Smith did marry woman that were already married, he used the old line that God told him that they must have relations with him or they will suffer the wrath of God

    • Steve says:

      This is another one of the deceiving statistics in this map. Utah was ranked highest in ONLINE porn consumption, but that’s mostly due to the fact that there are no “Adult” video stores in the state, so the only source for people to get porn (if they are sick enough to do so) is online. The University of Utah had the highest as well as a few tiny mining towns (I suppose they don’t know what else to do in those towns), so that drove the per capita use up higher.

  6. Me says:

    Funny but completely bogus.

    North Dakota has more fatal car crashes than Wyoming(just in 2010 alone). Wyoming’s downfall is all the oil drilling. Very little Solar and wind power. (Some wind power but not much) Ugliest residents would have to go to SD(been there seen that 700 lb beast walking down the street!). Mn does not have more tornadoes than tornado alley. … Should I go on?

    • Ty says:

      Is that total number or rate per 100,000 in car deaths” Also, what does wind power or solar have to do with oil drilling? Most power is generated form Coal.

      I grew up in NM, I find it hard to believe that “anti-social” is the best they could do, and how the hell could that possibly be measured objectively? With all the heroin junkies up in Rio Arriba, there must be a better claim to fame.

      • Blogengeezer says:

        Rio Arriba receives the greatest percentage of it’s ‘Lifestyle Funding’ from historically endless US taxpayer funded ‘subsidies’ (generations). Government funding is the ‘Reason’ for the violence and predictable anti-social behavior. Dependency does debase a society, rendering it vegetative and predictably always voting for an ever more subsidy oriented government. Taxpayers are not the only people that suffer in this forever dependent ‘black hole’ lifefstyle.. NM is very rich in Geology, Geography and pleasant Climate averages. Second to none in those aspects.

        • Mary says:

          Yeah, if you like the sun in your face all the time like the drunk who refuses to pass out long after the party has ended! I’m going back to El Norte!

      • salem says:

        True. When an entire TV series is based on the meth trade in Albuquerque, maybe it’s time to think about that.

    • Shortkut says:

      I wouldn’t take much of these state labels to heart either, seems like all the sources are either out of date or obscure. As for the Minnesota tornado deal, summer of 2010 had record number of tornadoes for the state ,(even had something like 17 touchdowns in one night) so these figures are based off 2010 alone. I would not give the state the “Tornado” title because of one year.

    • thesystm says:

      Wyoming does have the highest per capita, but that’s not very hard when there are so few people and the cops have a tendancy to let Wyoming residents get away with drunk driving and speeding. But if you have out of state plates good luck going 3 miles over the speed limit.

    • JOLENE says:

      You need t check yourself friend and make the distinction of Ugliest People Born and Raised in Wyoming……I moved here to Casper and it was a mistake. You are right about the “locals” not being attractive. And the clothing is either Cowboy attire or the ever so fashionable Pajama bottoms, flipflops, and a skin tight top high lighting every fat roll. Can’t understand how people remain so fat when the Meth use is so high….Go figure.

  7. Brandy says:

    This is a neat little infographic but I started laughing when I saw Ohio’s label. I’m not saying that Ohio is more or less nerdy than any other state, but using library attendance data to validate that leaves out multiple variables. I’m from a small town in Ohio and the local library is very popular but mostly for the computers with Internet access and the free DVD/video rentals. That’s not to say people don’t check out books. But the high library attendance in that state may relate more to the poverty levels and the utilization of public resources than to levels of nerdiness.

    • Jeff Wysaski says:

      I’ll be the first to admit Ohio is a stretch. It, along with New Mexico, was the hardest to find a last place rank for. This map should certainly be taken as more of a novelty than anything. But you should be proud that Ohio’s shame isn’t quite as excessive as other states!

      • Gwenny says:

        And since when is being a “nerd” . . ie, more intelligent and educated . . something to be ashamed of? Or going to the library. Shoot, I used to go the library twice a week and check out the maximum. GO OHIO . . .and not just because I was born and raised there.

        • Anonymous says:

          Go ohio :) proud nerd (although infrequent library user) — but I’m proud that we have libraries for those that have no alternative

          • Jane says:

            Where did you get the idea that a library as something for those who have “no alternative”?! It is a community resource and is a splendid thing. To view it the way you have described is shameful – to you.

      • JustMe says:

        I’ll be the first to admit Ohio is a stretch. It, along with New Mexico, was the hardest to find a last place rank for.

        So it’s actually the worst at being notable for anything.

      • Alicia says:

        I certainly wouldn’t find the fact that we Ohioans go to the library frequently shameful in any way. My kids and I visit a few times a week. Northeast Ohio has wonderful libraries that do fantastic programs for kids (and adults as well). Go Ohio!

      • Grace says:

        Nerds do it better. Loving the nerdy label.

      • Jenna says:

        As a librarian, I actually take offense at the implication that going to the library is something shameful. The opposite, in fact. It should be something to be proud of. I found most of the rest of your map amusing, but that one turned me sour on the whole thing.

    • LEB says:

      Library use definitely is NOT a good sign for nerdiness, since most nerds are technophiles who are getting information via the internet on their computers, netbooks, iPads, and smartphones, and have no need for a public library. Ever. I consider myself a nerd, and the last time I was in a library was when I was in college 7 years ago. And I just studied in the library because it was quiet, not because I needed to check books out.

      A better metric for nerdiness would be number of electronic gadgets owned per person per household. IMO, if you own more than 3 gadgets (including a computer of any sort, a gaming console or device of any sort, a smartphone, or electronic reading pad of any kind), then you’re quite possibly a nerd.

      • Ohiolibrarian says:

        Well . . . ya know LEB, we have most the items/services in the library for public use and/or many libraries in Ohio are trying to win grants to get those items there. Tell me, where can you go to get reliable journal articles online without having to purchase? We have many databases available for the public to use. Come on in and see us sometime. We are not the library you describe.

      • aa says:

        but, these days most people who use electronics aren’t even nerds… every one with money has them. And now most libraries have all sorts of electronic resources for the hard-core nerds. So I think libraries are hardly an obsolete measure of your nerdiness.

      • RobUran says:

        Owning a lot of electronic gadgetry doesn’t necessarily make you a “nerd”. It might just mean you have a little too much disposable income, or wealthy, overindulgent parents.

  8. Seattle Snow says:

    Washington DC hmm maybe a rusty dildo because we are all getting screwed

  9. Anonymous says:

    Glad to see that the USA is all good with arming the drunken mob from Arizona.

  10. meg says:

    wtf ohio- why is “nerdiest state” considered a bad thing? highest number of library visits per capita sounds like a pretty wonderful statistic to me.
    ohio is just so mediocre at everything else that they really had to stretch for something, i guess.

    in other news: fuck yeah worst drivers, point of pride right there.

    • Anasazi says:

      Having lived in Ohio… the library system was wonderful there (well, back in the 80s… I can not vouch since then).

  11. Ashley says:

    Maine was awarded with “Dumbest State” because we have the lowest SAT score. In all honesty (and without sounding too defensive) I do have an explanation for this besides the fact that we are “the dumbest state.”

    When No Child Left Behind was implemented, Maine decided that rather than making high school juniors take an additional standardized test on top of taking the SAT, ACT, AP tests, etc, it would simply make the SAT its standardized test for all high school juniors. This means that every high school junior in Maine takes the SAT regardless of future plans. The state pays for it and the school provides transportation if you can’t get to the school on the Saturday morning when it’s held. It’s designed to encourage more students to pursue a higher education, some schools have even made completing a college application a graduation requirement.

    I’m not complaining about the state’s SAT policy, in fact, I actually benefited from it because I chose to take the SAT only once, meaning the state footed the bill for me. If I had had to pay for the SAT out of pocket, I probably wouldn’t have been able to afford to take the AP tests I took that year. I’m simply stating that our SAT averages will obviously be lower because everyone from future Ivy-leaguers to high-school dropouts is required to take the SAT their junior year.

    • ND says:

      This is similar to the situation here in Alberta. All other provinces either have their standardized testing (for school quality) in grades 10 or 11, or they do not count towards graduation. But here in Alberta, we write our provincial diploma exams at the end of grade 12, and they are worth 50% of our graduating mark. This ensures that the standard for grades coming out of high school is uniform across the province, but it also means we have the lowest average marks in the country. However, we are still considered to have possibly the best educational system in the country, so I suppose there are some benefits.

      Just for the record, another reason that Alberta has a standardized test at the END of high school is that there was a particularly disgusting incident a while back where a holocaust denier taught at a high school in the province and warped the minds of several years of graduates. No one really caught for a while because the town was small, and there was really no way to ensure consistency of what was being taught. But now there is.

    • mikeoverhere says:

      I suspect a more likely explanation is that Maine has a higher percentage of college-bound students, and thus a higher percentage of students take the test.

      I doubt anyone would put Maine at the top of their dumb list.

  12. James says:

    I am a web developer in Utah, which is supposed to have the highest porn usage. I investigated the claim because a nearby town was supposed to have the highest rate of porn usage in the country, which disproportionately effected the rankings, because it was a per capita ranking, based on communities rated. It is a very, very, very small town. I had been asked by a resident of that town to create a porn site for him, I refused and apparently he went on to do his own site. My understanding is that he steals porn images from as many sites as possible to populate his own site. Since, then I have heard of a handful of other web design companies doing the same in the Salt Lake area. Knowing that information personally, I question the reliability of that particular survey.

    • Anonymous says:

      Another defense for Utah…
      The map says Porn Usage, but when you read further it says internet subscriptions. Utah doesn’t have ‘adult’ movie stores and what not to the same extent other places do. To access that content you nearly need internet subscriptions, which were the only thing really being tracked here.

      • mike says:

        Get over it , it is about people buying porn, utah is not heaven on earth no matter how much an advertising agency is paid to give that impression, there are a lot of troubled people in that state

  13. LS says:

    man, I’d take 30 minutes sleeping or reading on the subway over any amount of time driving in a heartbeat. must be why I live in New York.

  14. A weatherman says:

    Minnesota is misleading. They led the nation in tornadoes in 2010, but that was the first time ever. Usually they’re pretty far down the list behind the usual suspects: Texas, Oklahoma, and Kansas.

    • A Fellow Minnesotan says:

      I was hoping someone would comment on this! Thank you! It would be more accurate if they looked at yearly tornadoes over the past 50 years than just 2010. You’re right, typically Minnesota doesn’t have nearly as many as any of the states in Tornado Alley.

    • Rick Wicklin says:

      That’s right. A better measure is the density of tornadoes (number per square kilometer in the state). There is a nice density plot of the 30 year average for tornadoes at

      • Barbara says:

        I think our ‘worst’ rating should be related to eating lye softened fish. Minnesota worst for Lutefisk consumption! other than that, my home of 21 years is frakin awesome!

    • Squeegee says:

      Don’t forget Kentucky. We get a lot of tornados every year. We even get earth quakes.

  15. Liz says:

    I can’t believe it’s beastiality. LOL. Agreed, Ohio’s got it going on, and New Mexico isn’t anti-social, nor is Maine stupid. I can only hope that Washington’s ranking is due to longstanding rivalries between our state universities involving prank calls about sheep and cows to the rivals’ local police stations…

    • Anonymous says:

      Freaking Enumclaw ruins our reputation! And independent films about having sex with farm animals….Majorly disturbing stuff going on here.

  16. Liz says:

    Oh, and to fellow Washingtonians: do not follow the link. I checked, and it’s bona-fide, but you will be so sorry if you look to see the details. Suffice it to say we’re highest in convictions as well, and each case looks to be absolutely gut-wrenching.

    • Living in the infamous Washington Bestiality County says:

      Hey, it’s hardly fair to make such a big deal out of “most beastiality”. It was FREE ENTERPRISE at work. Dude would give you the choice of his livestock and make a video for you to take home! Unfortunately, there WAS the guy who died from embarrassing injuries from that feisty stallion.

  17. KH says:

    Nevada is higher than Michigan in unemployment- 14.5%

  18. Anna says:

    south carolina- why is highest mobile homes a bad thing….??
    kinda screwed up here didn’t ya?

  19. Linda says:

    Hawaii Is Most Honeymoons though…..

  20. Jodi says:

    (Agreeing with Michelle above)

    I find this interesting… However, I find that putting the “worst at” label on some of these things doesn’t exactly work out right.

    For example: Michigan is the worst at unemployment. Which, the way I read it, means that we’re bad at being unemployed, which would mean that we’re actually really good at being employed (which, sadly, isn’t the case).

    Maybe I’m being a bit too technical, but it strikes me that this wasn’t the best way to display these facts. The “worst at” works for Texas, but I’m having trouble finding more examples that do work.

    Am I just being crazy picky here?

  21. TK says:

    Not surprised about Kentucky. You could probably get Cancer just driving through that state. Pulled into a Wendy’s and it wreaked of smoke. Looked over the saw people puffing away. It was like I was in a 3rd world country.

  22. Maureen says:

    Since when is it a bad thing to go to the Library ?? Good for you Ohio!! There’s hope yet!

  23. required says:


    California has 12,179,362+ more people than Texas yet Texas leads the country in cancer risk from hazardous air pollutants. Hence Texas has the worst air pollution.

  24. required says:

    In other words, “Texas emits about 11 percent of U.S. greenhouse-gas emissions, more than any other state, according to Texas EPA spokesman David Gray.

    If Texas were a country it would be the world’s eighth-largest polluter.”

    • texas resident says:

      but everyone one of you uses the products that come with the pollution the plants in TX create. If you don’t want the pollution, don’t demand the products. Unfortunately, unless you go live in the forest and live solely off the land, I highly doubt it’s possible to sustain from using these products.

  25. misogyny, sd says:

    Doesn’t South Dakota also have the most draconian anti-abortion laws? What an awful place to be a woman.

    • angie says:

      …or a great place to be a baby??

    • North Dakota is worse says:

      North Dakota is worse (not by all that much IMO, but still worse). It’s the only state where it’s legal to rape somebody who’s developmentally disabled (you get off scot free if you get up in front of a judge and say that you had no idea your victim was developmentally disabled), and if you have a miscarriage, gods help you because you’ve just committed a felony.

      • LG says:

        And if she doesn’t have a miscarriage, good luck to that poor baby who has a developmentally disabled mother and a father who is a rapist. I think I see a bright future for that lucky baby! People in this country, no matter the state are effed-up when it comes to this issue. There are many reasons that some babies should not be born. Life, is not always “a bowl of cherries!”

  26. TheReviewer says:

    I guess its official, Boston, Mass. has the worst drivers

  27. Katharine says:

    My sole complaint about this graph is that you listed nerdiness as somehow a bad thing.

    • SS4BC says:

      Agreed. Nerdiness is NOT a bad thing. Honestly, putting “Cleveland” down as Ohio’s worst trait is probably better than “nerdiness”. OMG – They go to LIBRARIES there.

    • jimmy says:

      Ohio most likely has the most nerds due to library visits because it is the state with the largest number of colleges per capita-largely contributing to the number of libraries-as well as library visits.

  28. Mack Ramer says:

    Illinois statistic is totally wrong and no surprise you have no citation. IL 2009 robberies per 100,000 population = 177 cf. IL has not been over 200 robberies per 100,000 population since 2002. Not. Even. Close.

    Compare to Nevada’s 228 or Maryland’s 211

  29. James says:

    I have to take argument for your citation of Maine as the dumbest state. If you look closely at the data, Maine has the lowest average SAT score but also highest participation with 98%. In contrast, the highest ranked state, Iowa, had only a 3% participation. This greatly skews the results of the data because in states like Iowa, only the best students, or those who did poorly on the ACT, are likely to take the SAT. This would greatly raise the average test score relative to states like Maine, where the taking the SAT is mandatory for all public school students.

  30. Rob U says:

    The data for “dumbest” is highly suspect given the huge variation in participation rates for the SAT. Maine *requires* high school students to take the SAT (see Comparing Maine’s performance across nearly the full population (92%; special ed along with several other categories of students are released of the SAT requirement) of Maine high school students against other states where just a select (and likely college bound) set of students is very dubious — in Iowa just 3% of students take the SAT and probably nearly all of them intend on heading to east-coast colleges that require the SAT (in lieu of the ACT). That’s really apples and oranges – and likely explains why the state with the lowest participation ranks highest, and the state with highest participation ranks lowest.

    • Barbara says:

      I know that putting a kid in a room on a Saturday and forcing them to take a long, complicated test they don’t want to take is going to result in some piss poor scores.
      My brother used to fill in the blocks on the standardized tests randomly – just because he didn’t want to bother trying. Yes, he’s a life-long loser and it’s amazing he’s still alive at 53.

  31. Lo says:

    In the bonus stats for Mississippi, the infant mortality rate isn’t 10.3% (which would be bad for a 3rd-world country) but 10.3 deaths per 1,000 live births, or 1.03%. Still the worst, but not nearly as bad.

  32. guest says:

    Why is being the nerdiest state something to be shameful about? Go Ohio! :)

  33. anonymous says:


    Congrats on reporting this. That being said, please check your spelling. Yes, I admit I’m being an @$$, not simply because I want to. I simply dislike it when people are unable to spell correctly.

    Thanks again for reporting on this.

    peace on earth

    • yoyoma says:

      peace on earth yourself. what annoying thing to do, go around correcting grammar and spelling. do you carry a red pen with you?

  34. FoxyKate says:

    What state are you from, that you are okay saying, “worst at?” Which state has the worst grammar?

    Also: arson – sweet! Rock on, Philly!

    • Ron Witt says:

      Kate: It’s only Latinate (the romance languages, such as French, Italian and Spanish) grammatical constructs that forbid ending sentences in prepositions. Germanic constructs, from which English is derived, actually encourage ending sentences in prepositions.

      It’s funny, because on your blog you start out a post with ‘It was a dark and stormy night’. This was a grammar joke created by Charles Schultz well over 50 years ago to illustrate bad writing. It’s bad usage. Nights are always dark.

      • Ron Witt says:

        PS–The whole myth of ending sentences in prepositions got passed down to a dumber generation in the early 20th century. They just weren’t listening closely to the parents and teachers back in the 1800s, when Latin was regularly taught, that this convention was only part of the Latinate.

      • Wild Clover says:

        Out here in the countryside, a clear night with a million stars, even without the moon,is light enough to navigate down through my yard, even with no house lights. Conversely, cloud cover makes it blacker than sin. So, no, nights are only always dark as opposed to day. There are clear, moonlit or starlit nights, then there are dark and stormy ones where I best take a flashlight if I need to go to my car or risk tripping on the kid’s toys.

  35. Pat says:

    Re the MS infant mortality rate, that rate is measured per 1000 infants, not percent. 10/1000 or about 1%, not 10%.

  36. librarylea says:

    Librarian. Proud Buckeye.

    Hell yeah, Ohio! Now let’s just all agree to put some money into our top-ranked libraries. 16 five-star libraries according to Library Journal, a total of 31 in the 3-5 star range. 11 of the top 15 in Hennen’s American Public Library Rankings with a lock on the top EIGHT spots. Use your libraries, pay your late fees, and most importantly use your vote to support your library!

  37. L Norton says:

    Iowa should actually be known for meth. Not old people. Thats stupid.

    • hahaha says:

      I agree! Or most teenage pregnancies.

    • Anonymous says:

      No, Michigan has a really problem with meth. In the last 6 months 1 out of 7 households in Northen Michigan have either been busted for meth, or are producing or using… it’s really bad up here. You don’t even see anyother types of drugs anymore.

  38. wbkruse says:

    Illinois is 1 Rod Blagojevich conviction away from having a 50% conviction rate of governors for corruption, how is it Tennessee is more corrupt? Are there any stats out there showing Tennessee is really worse off than IL is?

  39. Cliff says:

    Your representation of Maine is highly misleading. Maine is the only state in the country that requires every student to take the SAT. Close to 90% of students take the SAT, compared to well under 50% in most states. That means that in most of the country, only students who are almost certainly headed to college take it. If you look at Maine’s performance on tests that everyone takes in every state, such as the National Assessment of Educational Progress, Maine shows up well above average, and has been close to the top in some years.

    If you need to rank us last in something, R&D investment and age of housing stock are places where we are last or close to last.

  40. Laura says:

    My Wisconsin is only at 23% of binge drinkers? I would have thought it was higher!!

    • Hotpink says:

      I agree! That should be looked at again. Just moved out of Wisconsin and I would say 80% of the people I met there were binge drinker or straight up alcoholics. The 23% is probably only the ones who admitted to it. Although I worked with professionals, physicians and even school teachers that openly admitted to their regular binge drinking habits. If you attend a Brewer’s game there you will see more than half the crowd leave drunk and not one person will get pulled over or stopped by the police anywhere near the stadium. It’s crazy how much that state supports the sale of alcohol. They also have the most lenient drunk driving laws.

  41. Don L says:

    CT breast cancer -hows their abortion rate?

    NH high corporate taxes (also homeowner-the big lie is they have no income taxes -big deal if you’re retired

    WY -those big sky highways and booze don’t mix well -fewer fender-benders I’ll bet.

    MA worse drivers -uh huh -you bet, but they also come in last with humility – preachest group -the most bumperstickers on a Volvo state.

    MN Highest number of tornadoes – a surprise, but explains all those flying wall-eyed pike.

    OKLahoma -highest XY chromosones incarceration? Less liberal judges?

    IOWA oldest people -those corn and ham dinner diets must work.

    • Toni says:

      You must be one of those sad ignorant people that believe breast cancer and abortion go hand in hand. Go back to school and stop embarrassing yourself

  42. Frank Pirro says:

    WooHoo, I’m gonna move to Washington!!! Thanks for the tip.

  43. yoyoma says:

    According to the responses here, Maine should be whiniest and Ohio most defensive. geez have a sense of humour

  44. Don Quixokie says:

    Oklahoma leads the nation in women incarcerated and ties for rate of strokes…but we are SO competitive in lowest funding for education, high school drop outs, teen pregnancy, inceration over all, uninsured children, child abuse and child deaths. Really we are near the top of most sorry lists even if we lead in only a few. We are the poster child of what Conservative values look like in terms of social costs.

  45. Seth says:

    Alabama – Highest rate of stroke: Two Words: “Soul Food”
    Alaska – Highest rate of suicide: Two Words: “Sarah Palin”
    Arizona – Highest rate of alcoholism: you live in a desert that borders Mexico
    Arkansas – worst average credit score: Clinton a…nd Huckabee are doing fine so I don’t know what the problem isSee More
    California – worst air pollution – Duh!
    Colorado – highest rate of cocaine use – after a while you need something besides Coors
    Connecticut – highest rate of breast cancer – no idea, but it’s probably NY’s fault
    Delaware – highest abortion rat…e – I guess DuPont paint is to blame

    • Highpionter says:

      Alaska – Highest rate of suicide: Two Words: “Sarah Palin”

      It probably is due to the long, cold dark winters. Alaska also has the highest ratio of men to women, and very low population density. Undoubtedly, with many lonely, single men, there is undoubtedly going to be a high rate of suicide.

      Colorado – highest rate of cocaine use – after a while you need something besides Coors

      Colorado has many outstanding brewpubs and craft brewers, such as Old Belgium Brewery of Fort Collins. Colorado is one of the best states for its variety of beer.

  46. Seth says:

    Florida – highest rate of identify theft – old people learning to use the internet
    Georgia – highest rate of flu – I’m not sure why, but I blame Coca Cola, Delta and the entire city of Savanah
    Hawaii – highest cost of living – it’s called the… Pacific Ocean, and it’s pretty darn big
    Idaho – lowest level of Congressional clout – there’s a state named “Idaho” ? When did that happen?
    Illinois – highest rate of robbery – South Side
    Indiana – most environmentally unfriendly – I’m guessing the 24 coal power plants has something to do with this
    Iowa – highest percentage of people 85 and older – corn is the blood of life
    Kansas – lowest number of activity days per month (3.5 days) – Thank you John Deere!
    Kentucky – most cancer deaths – **see stat on tobacco usage per state**
    Louisiana – highest rate of gonorrhea – Mardi Gra!
    Maine – lowest SAT scores – Blame Canada!!
    Maryland – highest rate of AIDS – it’s actually not the worst, that title bel…ongs to Washington D.C. and be a threefold margin
    Massachusetts – worst drivers – Stupid Red Sox
    Michigan – highest unemployment rate – for further explanation, talk to Michael Moore
    Minnesota – highest number of tornadoes – The state used to be full of mountains, but Jesse Ventura brought t…hem down to size
    Mississippi – highest rate of obesity – See Alabama above
    Missouri – highest rate of bankruptcy – too many people still betting on the Royals
    Montana – highest rate of drunk driving deaths – this is what happens when you have to drive 60 miles to the closest bar
    Nebraska – highest rate of women murd…ered – uh…corn?
    Nevada – highest rate of violent crime – not possible, I mean Vegas and Reno are in Nevada!
    New Hampshire – highest rate of corp taxes – there are no corps in NH so this is moot
    New Jersey – highest rate of citizen taxes – Thanks a lot Corzine!
    New Mexico – lowest ranking in social health policies – when you rank towards the bottom …in Education, Poverty, Suicide and Child Well Being….yeah
    New York – longest average daily commute – MTA, LIE, FDR, GWB
    North Carolina – lowest average teacher salary – tobacco road
    North Dakota – ugliest residents – Blame Canada!
    Ohio – nerdiest state based on high number of library visits – War of Toledo
    Oklahoma – highest rate of female incarceration – too m…any men auditioning for the role of Curly
    Oregon – highest rate of long-term homeless – still better than living in Mississippi
    Pennsylvania – highest rate of arson deaths – LEGAL FIREWORKS!
    Rhode Island – highest rate of illicit drug use – Mike “The Situation”
    South Carolina – highes…t percentage of mobile homes – mostly occupied by North Carolina teachers
    South Dakota – highest rate of forcible rape – see North Dakota above
    Tennessee – most corrupt state – John Grisham novels
    Texas – lowest high school graduation rate – How ’bout them Cowboys! YEE HA!
    Utah – highest rate of online porn subscriptions – just a wild guess, but Joseph Smith and Bringham Young
    Vermont – infertility – blame the cheddar
    Virginia – alcohol-related motorcycle deaths – Michael Vick is to blame for everything
    Washington – most cases of bestiality – too many North Dakota transplants
    West Virginia – highest rate of heart attack – ask Jamie Oliver, he’ll tell you why
    Wisconsin – highest rate of binge drinking – GO BADGERS!!!
    Wyoming – highest rate of …deadly car crashes – the “Brokeback Mountain” affect

    • zara says:

      I hate to break it to you…but Montanans do not have to drive 60 miles to get to a bar…at my last count, there were about 5-10 bars per mile within the city limits of Missoula, and at least 10 bars between Missoula and Hamilton, and again, 4 bars per block once IN Hamilton….it’s the same all over the state….It’s not the distance…it’s the fact that you can’t find a postage stamp worth of space between opportunities to drink. It’s truly pathetic to watch the police chatting with each other as people stumble from the bars INTO their cars and drive off without a care in the world.

      • KB says:

        So… Missoula is MT? Get out of that tree-huggin hole and go east! Lots of kids ride a schoolbus 50 or more miles one way- to towns with only a post office and a bar. Possibly the crackdowns on drunk driving lend to the status we got? Let’s hope it continues.

    • Kevin says:

      I personally am not upset or surprised with the results. Those that live in WI, know that we love our beer!

    • toni says:

      trying not to spit out my drink…

  47. SpaceElephant says:

    The reason you shouldn’t use DC isn’t bc it’s “the worst at everything.” It’s because it is a city, composed 100% of urban areas and an urban population, and it can’t rightly be compared to states that are, by nature, composed of both urban and rural areas. DC’s population is irdiculously dense compared to any other state, which would therefore totally skew the statistics.

  48. Ohio's Library Visit Truth says:

    So, I think you need to get your facts straight about Ohio’s library visits.

    The vast majority can be explained by this typical Ohio State fan charged with criminal conduct at his local library:

  49. SpaceElephant says:

    Also- agree w other commenters that the “worst at” moniker makes no sense. If a state were the “worst at” rape they’d have the lowest occurence, not the highest. Etc.

  50. Merennulli says:

    I like the sentiment that everyone has their downsides, but this is horribly inaccurate, and aside from a few stray states, not all that funny. Honestly, the only part I laughed at was who the graphic was attributed to, and the comments.

    I could see if you were playing off state stereotypes for a joke, but this sort of pseudo-research really doesn’t sell a joke.

    And Seth, don’t blame the parents. It’s the Children of the Corn doing it. :P

  51. Paul says:

    Washington is ‘worst at’ Bestiality? Surely that’s a good thing?! California is ‘worst at’ air pollution? Again…….! Which state is the author from, the one that is evidently ‘best at’ grammar.

  52. Kari says:

    That’s hilarious. Love Utah’s……………go figure!

  53. Stephen v says:

    New Mexico has:

    the highest rate of uninsured motorists,
    the highest rate of teen pregnancies
    and the highest rate of drive-by shootings.

    yet they chose “antisocial” as its worst thing??????

  54. Shannon says:

    *pops collar* I’m not ashamed of loving the library!

  55. Pretty juvenile humor. I mean, what *adult* would look down on a high ratio of visits to the library?

  56. Anonymous says:

    What’s “bestiality”?

  57. Jennifer Rowe says:

    Abortion is not shameful.

    • Steve says:

      If you’ve ever held a newborn baby in your arms, or watched your son throw a ball for his first time, or helped your daughter take her first step, etc. . . you would know that it is shameful.

      • Jeremy K. says:

        I’ve held newborn babies in my arms, watched my son throw a ball for his first time, and helped my daughter take her first step.

        I’ve also seen teenage girls drop out of high school and live in poverty — and off welfare! — because they couldn’t get decent jobs. I’ve dealt with the fallout of unwanted children beaten to death by drug-addicted parents. I’ve seen girls thrown out of their homes and disowned by their families because of their pregnancies, who then end up in dire circumstances because they feel they have no choice but to have the baby.

        Abortion, however abhorrent, must remain an option until we solve the root problems of unwanted pregnancies — among both women and men.

        • LG says:

          Thank you Jeremy K. – Why is it that so many people cannot see how terrible some babies lives are? For any number of reasons, many of those poor babies would have been better off had they not been born (as hard as that is for some people to accept). Not all babies are shown the love that Steve is talking about. That’s a very idealistic view of the world. Why should young pregnant girls/women (who may have become pregnant against their wills) be forced to have babies they are not able to care for properly because people like Steve are not aware of their circumstances. It’s a lose-lose situation – for the mother and the baby! Empathy!! Look it up.

  58. Michelle says:

    Maine is not the dumbest state. Almost every high school student is required to take the SAT because Maine uses the SAT to assess the education system. So, actually they’re aiming much higher than other states that have as low as a 3% participation rate in the SAT.

    • Michelle says:

      Oh, full disclosure: I’m not from Maine. I live in California. Lowest average SAT score just isn’t the same as dumbest if not every student in every state is taking them. I mean, the states with the highest average SAT scores also have the lowest participation rate vs states with the lowest average SAT scores having the highest participation rate. So using SAT scores is comparing the brightest college bound students in one state with all high school graduates in another state.

  59. j$ says:

    This chart about what category each state ranks worst in is funny, except how DARE you say my state is the worst at something! There is a perfectly good explanation and/or mitigating circumstances that I will impotently rant about if only for the amusement of people with a sense of humor. For shame, I say!

    That being said, I have always been curious how Utah tops most lists for quality of life, health, happiness, etc. Suddenly it all makes sense!

    • David says:

      You are so right!! People get all proud about map lines defined 200 years ago by rivers, mountains, or longitude and latitude lines. Seriously, people need to chill and laugh at themselves once in a while. I live in Texas and if you travel outside Austin, TX city limits it is just 100s of miles of uneducated dumb asses, just like that stat says, but I’m from here and still love Texas and all the dumb asses.

      • David says:

        Heck, I’m from San Antonio and I’m fairly sure San Antonio has the highest dropout rate of any major city in the US. The people in San Antonio don’t even realize how stupid they are because only 30% graduate from high school.

  60. South Dakota says:

    Man, the rest of the country really has to jump-start the rape machine!

  61. Elliott says:

    Vermont has a low birth rate due to an aging population. It has nothing to do with a lack of fertility – although I suppose older people are less fertile…

    • Jessica says:

      Low birth rate isn’t just due to infertility it can be people choosing not to have more (or any) children.

      • carrie says:

        that’s what i came here to say. even if the population were young and vigorous, and still having fewer children, “infertile” isn’t the word. that’s why the term is “child-free” and not “child-less”

        maybe vermont is the best at being educated on birth control methods. :-p

        • Vermont Booster says:

          Actually, the Vermont population is not so much aging – it is the numbers of gay/lesbian et al. First state, few decades ago, to legislate gay unions. Largest city has one of the most gay-friendly and officially supportive universities in the country. Active gay organization with univ co-sponsored activities.
          Hey, not a gay bar in town – not needed :) )

  62. David says:

    Utah also has the smallest penis size and subsequent the lowest gay population

  63. Snowdog says:

    Massachusetts has the worst drivers? But I thought Teddy Kennedy was dead?

  64. Jessica says:

    I think it’s embarrassing the worst thing you can level against Ohio is that its citizens like to read, or at least like to support their local library. Go nerds!

  65. Ron Witt says:

    Binge drinking is wrongly defined by sociologists as having 3 drinks or more in one day. 3 drinks in one hour doesn’t even result in reaching .10 BAC. The reason this is done is so that unscrupulous people can demonize alcohol and try to tell normal people they have a problem. Someone who has one drink every two hours on a 10 hour day of drinking for football will have had 5 drinks in a day and never even reach .03 BAC. It’s a ridiculous statistic. WI is has often been ranked the fattest state. Which state got that? I think we’d surpass them.

    • KB says:

      Ron-BAC is based on body weight, alcohol percentage in a drink, and rate of consumption. One shot of whiskey puts my tiny body over .08!

      • Hotpink says:

        Anyone that drinks multiple drinks on a regular basis is hardly considered to be normal. However, after living in Wisconsin for over 4 years I have discovered that the people there are in their own little drinking bubble. If you need that much alcohol on a daily basis, you probably need to take a serious look at your life and most likely need to look for a new direction. Alcohol should not equal happiness as it seems to for most people in that state.

        • Aaron Lehman says:

          I live in Appleton Wisconsin, born and raised. I just turned 21 about 3 months ago but I’ve been boozin pretty hard since 16. Your right, we get fucked up. But shit man were all happy, we all die around 70-90 like everyone else. Fuck it, how ya live your life son. Binge drinking=partying, not alcoholism… The people who have real drinking problems here are people who live up north, Any time i went to mine or my friends cottages up there we would go to the bar and it would be packed with Wasted ass fucks at like 3pm.

  66. California Resident says:

    But…. California can’t help our air pollution problem. California has the constant inversion layer and high pressure systems that prevent the air pollution from being blown out and away, and the mountains that prevent the polluted air from being blown out to the east, and the coastline whose offshore winds prevent the polluted air from being taken out to the ocean. So evidently, there’s only so many emissions laws we can enact, and so many regulations we can put on our factories before it can’t be helped any more.

    Therefore, California is not the “worst air pollution” because California just happens to have bad conditions for trapping air pollution, whereas all other states across the nation, no not have the conditions that allow air pollution to persist.

  67. Hal Smith says:

    I don’t understand. If Delaware has the highest rate of abortion, doesn’t that make it the BEST at abortion, not the worst? Shouldn’t the worst at abortion be the state with the highest rate of unsuccessful abortion attempts?

    I also don’t see why you would term abortion as an unsavory. Would you rather have more unwanted children?

    • Toni says:

      I guess they meant the fact that the people there most likely dont use contraception hence the high % of abortions

    • mike says:

      well the majority of people in the USA think of abortion as murdering a baby, with all the contraception that can be had this should not be

      • Barbara says:

        No, Mike, they don’t.
        The majority of the population believes it to be a personal choice and one that is protected by the right to privacy. As your name is Mike and you will therefore never be pregnant, I politely invite you to button it.

  68. gkb says:

    Two of the 15 America’s Next Top Model winners to date come from North Dakota. So much for “ugliest.”

  69. Dog lover says:

    Have heart Washington…. that’s just 4 reported. We know there’s more.

    Seriously is that even illegal?

  70. jav says:

    Funny how one little map makes everyone jump into a pair of pissy pants and get all excited. Who cares about it, (other than the beastiality thing in the northwest) I would have guessed that or kentucky where everyones related.

    • AbC says:

      …lol your funny. where are you from? because im from Kentucky and none of my family is related….and neither are any of my friends families related. if you have never lived here you have no idea what your talking about. only morons think that everyone here is related and we are hilibillys. its a bunch of crap.

      • ummmm says:

        Your family isn’t related? and your friend’s families aren’t related? I think you want to rephrase that. By the way my great grandparents are first cousins and my parents have some of the same cousins. I’m not a Kentuckian, just Italian.

  71. Emily says:

    haha fucking Utah is where all the porn is at? makes sense.. mormons…..

  72. RandyK says:

    SC noted for most mobile homes? Come on, we are at the bottom in so many better ways than that. As to the mobile homes, we do decorate them very nicely by hammering beer bottle caps into the door frames, and putting out real nice lawn jockeys and flamingos. I am sure that we are also among the top in road kill consumption as well. Get with it!

  73. MD_and_loves_it says:

    Have any of you actually been to suburban Maryland? It is arguably the nicest place in the whole country. Although I despise it, same goes for Northern Virginia. As many of you have said, DC just has such bad statistics because it is just a city. I’d like to see the individual statistics for Los Angeles, Chicago, Las Vegas, Miami, etc., I’m sure that they’d be equally terrible.
    Also agreed on the binge drinking statistic for Wisconsin. I bet the statistic was taken in Madison…it’s a college town like many other places. Also its cold as f**k up there, they deserve to binge drink to keep warm.

  74. RandyK says:

    Oh, almost forgot my home town Myrtle Beach, center of the “Redneck Riviera”, the place to be if you like to wear a speedo and are 200 pounds overweight. I challenge all of you to defeat us in a race to the bottom. As to my fellow fellow South Carolinians, better from me than from “them damned Yankee traitors”, and could you please just go to the dentist? Just once?

  75. Jack says:

    Who says having the oldest population is bad? Now, if you’re Florida and all your old people are also a*****s, then yeah, that’s a problem. But to be old and alive in Iowa – that’s success!

    • JSW says:

      Iowa – the most boring, God-awful corny state! I’d rather be somewhere where there are beaches, things to do and some aholes than be landlocked in the middle of hell!!!

      Keep living “the dream.”

      • JOLENE says:

        JSW, How about you go for a nice swim in shark infested waters so. Not all of us want to be beach-babe-bimbos…..Besides, farmers feed your sorry ass. GO HAWKEYES!!!!!!!!!!

  76. Judy says:

    RE: Ohio. The criteria for “Nerdiest” is distressing. Wouldn’t you think library visits would indicate reading proficiency and intelligence? For three consecutive years in a row recently, the valedictorian in local High schools was one of our former library storytime kids. Not Nerdy. Bright and articulate!

    • Barbara says:

      Obviously the criteria for labeling this map was put together by a Jr. High kid who doesn’t have a library card. Libraries are the greatest places in the world. I’m from Ohio and have lived in Minnesota for 21 years: This summer, I took my 8 year old neighbor to the library and got him his first library card. He was completely stoked!!!

  77. you says:


  78. dgh says:

    Incoherent, poorly thought-out, poorly constructed. Some states are “worst at” X because the incidence of X in that state is lower than 49 others, and other states are “worst at” Y because the incidence of Y is higher than 49 others. If you’re worst at teacher salary, that means you don’t pay teachers as much, right? (Yes, right, according to the statistics you’ve used.) So if you’re worst at cocaine use that means you don’t use cocaine very much right? Why, no. You apparently mean “best at” in that category.
    Your failure may start with your inability to even correctly process your already-sketchy source information. In re North Dakota (where I’ve never been, and don’t care about) – you’ve identified it on the map as being worst at “ugliest residents” and go on to state that “North Dakota: ranked last in ugliest residents report as chosen by The Daily Beast”. Well, no, it didn’t. It ranked last in a prettiest residents report (and by “report” I see you mean slideshow). If you rank last in ugly, that means you’re least ugly. Not most ugly. See the difference?
    Please tell me you haven’t actually gone to college to get this dumb.

  79. Toni v. says:

    I get the feeling that the Maryland AIDS rate included DC. I lived in DC for a while and was warned from day 1 about the 1 in 3 HIV+ rate. So sad.
    Gotta love those Mormons in Utah – no gonorrhea or AIDS because they’re doing they’re thing on-line!
    Think I’ll move to Iowa. Good chance I’ll live to 85! I don’t see that as a negative.

  80. superposed says:

    I think “most people over 85″ (Iowa) or “most trips to the library” (Ohio) should be counted as good things.

  81. Robert says:

    Can ANYONE have ANYTHING positive to say other than negative jabs at whatever state and then taking instant defense at everything that’s been said?

    THAT’S the problem ALL OVER!!!

    We live in such a negative society because negativity, such as this rot is being perpetuated.

    How about balancing this with the positive things that also belong to each state.

    Misanthropy, why ‘you love me like you do? I’ll retire to my little hidey-hole until some sense can come to this world.

  82. Toni says:

    For OHIO. considering that they still pride themselves on their Klan membership. Highest Number of Open Racists should have been their shame.

    Most Library doesnt make them nerds, it means they are too poor to buy a computer of their own..then again when you’re too busy screaming about white power where will they find the time to get a job to get a computer?

    • RobUran says:

      “Highest Number of Open Racists”. Sweetie, I think you have Ohio confused with Massachusetts or Alabama. Can you cite a credible source for that statistic of yours?

      Maybe it’s because I live in a more urban, blue (Democratic) part of the state that I hardly ever see any racism. Maybe it’s more prevalent in the rural, red (Republican) counties, but I never travel to those places so I’ve never seen it for myself.

      • Toni says:

        You wanna deny the ongoing KLAN love in that State? Isnt a woman also currently serving cos she tried to get her kids into a predominantly white school? so spare me and sorry a person that is part of the majority race has no right telling others that racism desnt exist.
        It’s bloody rude

        • Alicia says:

          Wow. I’ve lived in Ohio my whole life… in different areas, different cities… rural, urban, and somewhere in-between. I’ve probably met thousands of people over the past 35 years of my life and I’ve never once experienced anyone that had “ongoing klan love”. Or any kind of klan love, for that matter. Strange.

          Also, I visit the local libraries about two or three times a week with my kids. Most of the people that I see are there for the fantastic programing that our libraries do, not because they are too poor to buy a computer. Guess what? I have three computers in my house, and I still go to my library all the time.

    • Barbara says:

      One or two ignorant people do not a state make. I grew up in Ohio and the “Mother of Presidents” is NOT a pro-Klan state. What’s the matter, honey? Couldn’t get into Ohio State? Go visit a library or two and take the SAT over again.

  83. GEAH says:

    Given how screwed up our government is, Idaho “shame” is something to be proud of.

    • anonymous says:

      so true yet so false at the same time. It’s not a good thing to be proud that our state’s government can’t get off its ass and do anything. We’re one of the reddest states in the nation and yet no one in the Idaho legislature can agree on anything. Just look at our two congressman; both are from the same political party yet they can’t agree on one damn thing.
      Oh and just so you know I am proud to be a born and bred Idahoan, I’m just tired of the damn political situation.

  84. Jessica G says:

    I don’t see why some people bitch….Baton rouge has the second largest rate of HIV and New Orleans is 3rd so yay me!!!! I also live in a state where people come from all over the world…TO ACT LIKE DRUNKEN IDIOTS and its spelled Mardi Gras…not Gra and you know what I’M TIRED OF PEOPLE COMING TO MY STATE TO GET DRUNK, FLASH PEOPLE AND ACT LIKE ALL AROUND DUMB ASSES! DO IT IN YOUR OWN FREAKING STATE! You know whenever COPS shows their Mardi Gras episodes, its always tourists who get arrested (one of my friends is a state trooper and he hates this time of year).

    “Oh no my state is the nerdiest” well my state obviously has a lot of STDs, crime, and idiots. We’re a giant bowl and it took longer for our own government to help us then it takes them to help other countries. People don’t realize that Louisiana still has areas that look exactly the same now as they did when the waters drained away….though I guess I can’t complain…at least we don’t have Bestiality or rape…

  85. mike says:

    Utah also has the highest rate of bank fraud and the highest number of woman in depression

    • mike says:

      UTAH’S 1998-2008 REVIEW (see below): Still leading the nation in abuse, rape, murder!
      In 2005, Utah had 32,203 total referrals for child abuse and neglect. Of those, 21,052 reports were referred for investigation.
      Divorces per 1,000 Population Utah-4.60 MA-2.40 NY -3.20 NJ-3.0

      Murder per 100,000 Pop. Utah-3.90 NH-1.70 IO-1.70 ND-0.90

      Rape per 100,000 Pop. Utah-42.70 NY -23.70 CA-33.40 VA-27.20

      *Source US Census Bureau

      Antidepressant drugs are prescribed in Utah more often than in any other state, at a rate nearly twice the national average. Other states with high antidepressant use were Maine and Oregon.

      • Steve says:

        Very clever Mike. Sighting the “US Census Bureau” as your “source.”

        The Mike who posted the above comment doesn’t know what he’s talking about.*

        *Source: US Census Bureau 2011

      • Brian says:

        Hahaha, nice try. If you’re gonna lie, you might as well not cite a source.

        Data on child abuse is here: Utah’s data is comparable to other states, in at about 1.5% of the under 18 population, but by no means the highest (ex. NY – 1.9%). The table doesn’t actually provide data per capita, so if anyone wants to compare states, you’ll have to calculate the percentage.

        Divorce data:
        per 1,000 population:
        UT – 4.5; NY – 4.8; NA – 3.0; NV’s by far the highest at 9.7, with 17 states total higher than UT. Nat’l average is 4.1, making UT slightly above average.

        Crime rates (murder and rape incl.):

        Murder per 100,000: UT – 1.5 (3rd lowest in the nation!); NH – 1.1 (lowest in the nation); IO – 2.6; ND – .9 (The one statistic you actually got right; lowest in the nation)
        So yeah, it’s pretty obvious you hand-picked your murder stats to make UT look bad, considering there are 47 states to pick from with higher murder rates! The national average is 5.4

        Rape: UT – 33.6; NY – 14.4; CA – 24.2; VA – 23.1
        Again, some hand-picked statistics. There are 18 states with higher rape rates than UT, and 10 states in the 31-35 range. Nothing glamorous, but suffice to say that UT is a bit above average here- the national average is 29.3.

        Suffice to say, you’re a devious person who twists statistics to spread lies.

        Also, the antidepressant statistics are not on the Census Bureau, and you have not cited a source. Of course, you’ve proven that you’re not reliable, so you’re probably lying about those too.

        Anyone can verify everything I have said.
        Source: US Census Bureau.

    • Little London Rez says:


  86. Adam says:

    Is “air pollution” some kind of code for homosexuality, illegal immigration, and debt?

    • Toni says:

      Homosexuality isnt a shame, you bloody bigot

      • Pau says:

        LMAO…whatever you say Toni.

        If it wasn’t shameful, there wouldn’t be a closet to come out of, would there?

        • Diane says:

          It isn’t a matter of shame, you imbecile. It’s fear of getting beaten or possibly killed by ignorant asses such as yourself.

        • Barbara says:

          Mike and Pau: People are forced into metaphorical closets because of bigots. Violence, discrimination in housing, jobs, etc are real things. Don’t let your own latent homosexuality and self-hate rule your life anymore. Come out of the closet, baby! Don your ruby slippers and dance! You two should exchange phone numbers!

  87. Ted Hughes says:

    I believe this chart has merit. At least my state of Alabama being noted for most strokes rings true. In my town every restaurant offers fried chicken.

  88. Ron says:

    As an Ohio resident, I’ll take the shame of “most library visits per capita!”

  89. t.h. says:

    Wouldn’t Texas be the dumbest state? They have the lowest high school graduation Maine is at least getting far enough to take the SAT.

    • bred, born, raised and educated in Texas says:

      Hey, to save money, the Texas State Legislature is seriously considering wiping out 12th grade & graduating after 11yrs of school. Juniors now Seniors? Just semantics.

  90. KB says:

    People… I believe this is supposed to be humerous. All states have good and, shall we say, not so good, attributes. Lighten up!

  91. MoneyDomme says:

    You can’t say Vermont has the highest infertility based on it’s low birth rate. Low birth rate is tied to amount of education – the more educated, the lower the number of children someone has. Vermont is also the best educated state… goes hand in hand.

  92. Jen says:

    Right now, CT is the worst at clearing snow! In 2 months my answer will be balancing an overspent budget from snow clearing.

  93. joseph james says:

    I think Vermont is the worst and most unfriendly state for retirees.

  94. Olga says:

    besides the library visit, this whole country is screwed. how can we have that many major problems..crap.

  95. linda says:

    Loved this! Webmaster, should make those url’s actual hyperlinks! :)

  96. Paul Berg says:

    Iowa is to be ashamed because it has the highest percentage of Elders, that is people over 85 year of age? To have people in the population who have lived a long life, who have experience and wisdom to share with the young, and who have become Elders–that is something a state should be ashamed of! CNN–YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED for posting such a shameful judgement online.

    • Peggy says:

      Iowa: highest percentage of people age 85 and older (1.8 percent) (tied with three other states)

      What is shameful about this? It’s shameful to suggest that it is.

  97. Texas says:

    You’re wrong again, you need to find updated sources. According to your source in 2004 Texas had the lowest rate of high school graduates. Well, in 2009 we were actually ranked 43rd in the nation w/ 61%. You can even do a quick google search and second link (and several) dated 2010 list Nevada at 51% for high school completion.

    Please look for the most reliable sources!

  98. Bart Scott says:

    Michigan unemployment

    so sad going down to the unemployment office and seeing all the sad faces looking for work.

  99. yeah right says:

    We have the highest number of library visits in Ohio because we have one of the country’s best library systems here in Columbus. That is not an idle boast, it really has been voted in the top 10 for several years in a row. For what it’s worth, our library system also has a large number of DVDs and music CDs available, so not all those visits are for nerdy purposes. But it’s odd that you have a state ranked for most high school dropouts, which presumably is a bad thing, but then learning is a bad thing too. Make up your mind.

    I hope your ranking for largest number of fat people comes from a place of “it sucks that something is damaging the health of these people” rather than “it sucks that fat people are allowed to live.” Did you happen to find stats for “highest number of overentitled immature selfish adult brats with a secret horror of getting fat someday”?

  100. loboofnm says:


  101. Critic46 says:

    Iowa’s isn’t so bad – maybe it means we live longer.

  102. Joel says:

    It seems like I should move to Ohio, Washington (because of an apparent lack of worstness), Iowa, or Idaho.

  103. Eat balls, other states! says:

    Utah is the sh:t! We’re better at sex than everyone else.

  104. Spokane SEO says:

    I’m now embarrassed to live in Washing state. Luckily I live on the border of WA & ID and am moving to the other side of the border here soon.

    • Matt says:

      Why, do they let you marry your sheep there? Or is your 10 year supply of ammo, freeze-dried food and “muscle” magazines finally going to arrive?

  105. SeanF says:

    Any chance you can explain where you got the 76.5 per 100K forcible rape rate for South Dakota? You don’t give a specific cite for that one, and neither of the two websites given at the beginning of the article back it up (the first doesn’t appear to break “violent crime” down into specific types, but ranks SD 4th in that category – a long way from worst – and the second gives SD a forcible rape rate of 39 per 100K).

    Your first website does rank SD last in “geographic disparity,” apparently meaning that we’ve got some really good areas and some really bad areas.

  106. willy says:

    Good for Oregon. High unemployment. Population of tree huggers.High taxes,
    a Mayor of its largest city “light in his loafers”, a state debt that rivals only D. C. and utter disregard for property owners. WOW, it just doesn’t get much better.

  107. kelsey says:

    Lol! highest female crime in Oklahoma… that doesnt suprise me!

  108. Denise says:

    Based on this, I’d consider moving to Ohio – they actually read there!!! (apparently not just blogs) Way to slam a state for literacy!!!

  109. Andrew Werling says:

    Nerdiest state? I’m not even from Ohio and I’m offended. Nothing wrong with being nerdy, or visiting libraries. If only we were the nerdiest *country*.

  110. Anonymous says:

    Not surprised that NC is dead last with teacher salaries…

  111. Mary says:

    I moved to NM to take care of my elderly mom. This is why I will move away asap and not grow old there! Finding senior services was hard and the people at the senior center were no help! Then if you do find something good you have to get on a waiting list!

  112. sehobo says:

    It does not surprise me about Delaware. This could be why they have the mentality they have towards women.

  113. bobcat says:

    I have been in Mississippi for two years now – I came here for a job. All I can say is, I CAN’T WAIT TO GET OUT OF HERE!

  114. JZ says:

    Haha Minnesota has the only thing that you can’t blame humanity for!! Minnesota FTW!!

  115. Leslie says:

    these are hilarious and would make great license plates. Instead of Florida the Sunshine State, it could be Florida, the Identity theft state. ha-ha…

  116. Waaaah-shingtonian says:

    To be fair, the Washington beastiality statistic is the total number for the entire state population. If you were to normalize it per capita, then it’d be beaten to the top spot by South Dakota at 1 case per 812,000 residents versus Washington State at 1 case per 1,670,000 residents. Of course, if you were to isolate it just to Enumclaw, it’d be something like 1 case per 2500 residents…

  117. Karl says:

    According to the oft-cited Harvard University, 40,000 people in the United States dies as a result from our health care system. So in a nation with grotesque obesity, STD’s, alcoholism ETC. out of a population with 300 million people, 99% benefit from our system. There is no health care crisis in our country, unless you’re one of those stereotypical Asians that anything short of perfection is a failure, I think we can all agree that American health care get’s an ‘A’!

  118. Dan says:

    Oregon doesn’t have high taxes. We don’t even have sales taxes (unless you’re in Ashland). State income taxes are average. AND if taxes were higher, perhaps that debt you’re so concerned about wouldn’t be as much of an issue. There’s a high population of both “tree huggers” and people who cut down trees. And yeah, Portland’s mayor is gay. Apparently that’s a problem for you. Grow up.

    • Little London Rez says:

      Homosexualality is ANTI-CHRISTIAN! The mayor of Portland, Oregon ought to be ASHAMED OF HIMSELF!

      • Hotpink says:

        Wow, you are just completely clueless! It’s hateful people like you that cause all the problems in society today. Quit being so judgemental of others. Your beliefs are just that, your beliefs. Keep ‘em to yourself please!

        • roland says:

          Well, she is right about it being anti-Christian. Like it or not, the bible says it’s ‘an abomination’. But on the other side of the coin, you shouldn’t feel a need to be ashamed for not being a Christian or disagreeing with their religion. There are many fine non-Christian people in this country.

    • Steve says:

      Actually Oregon has the nation’s highest personal income tax, followed by Hawaii.

  119. Dale says:

    What the hell does Idaho have to be ashamed about ? Sounds like it’s on the right track.

  120. Mary says:

    Wait…if North Dakota ranked last in an “ugliest residents” poll, doesn’t that mean it has the BEST looking people? Helloooo? Statistics fail?

  121. eli says:

    How is a commute shameful? Or abortion? Or tornadoes? Or nerdiness? This map is ridiculous.

  122. Jace says:

    Ugliest residents? Here? In North Dakota? Maybe the adults, but a large amount of the people in my high school are pretty damn sexy. Boys and girls, mmmmmm. Not all of course but a large amount.

  123. Lindrz says:

    All my Illinois peeps are threating to come over and rob me. My sister wants to also, but now lives in Montana. So as she weaves across the country drunk driving I hope she can survive SD or NE the rape and abuse women states… she’ll just have to have a few more drinks and run a few people over : D

  124. ms. tammie says:

    Very sad where is a person to live?

  125. Stephanie says:

    The data for Massachusetts is not only out of date, it is bad math. They just used straight numbers instead of %s. If you compare MA to CT, for example, CT is much worse (per the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration).



  126. Jim says:

    I agree, way too much beastiality going on in Washington.

  127. Mrs. Choukezonnadeack says:

    I guess every state someone is talking about in the comments, is the state they leave in.

  128. Todd says:

    Hold on… This is supposed to be a list of what each state is worst at and it lists Ohio as being the “nerdiest” because a lot of people visit the library..? How is that a bad thing? I’d venture to say it’s a great thing. People of Ohio are hungry for knowledge! lol
    It’s funny seeing that listed as a bad thing for Ohio next to stuff like “highest unemployment” and “arson”! haha
    GO OHIO!

  129. Little London Rez says:

    The most incredible is that of Utah.

    A “Vocal Mormon Majority”. But a “Silent Porno Majority”?

    And the “Nerdiest State” in my mind is still Iowa. But “Oldest State” is more of an honor than a title of shame.

    Interesting . . . to say the least!

    • Steve says:

      Actually Utah is really the highest in ONLINE porn use because “adult” video stores are banned from the state. It’s really just a few small mining towns that have excessively high porn use (perhaps they feel that there is nothing else to do there) and that brings up the per capita use.

      As with each of the “States of Shame” the data has been used to show what the author wanted to show.

  130. Luke says:

    Really??!! Air pollution is the worst thing in California?? Nothing about having the douchiest liberals on the planet or Hollywood in general, or the fact that their unfortunate population is taxed out the sphincter for EVERYTHING, or that Spanish is California’s official language, or that Californians inexplicably think they’re superior to every other human on Earth, or Nancy Pelosi, or that feeling visitors get that everything around them is covered in a fine layer of sleaze?

    How ’bout we change “Air Pollution” to “Everything”.

  131. joan holden says:

    I think NH having high corporate taxes is great. US should have higher corporate taxes in general. And what is wrong with low birth rate for VT and Maine? That is also a good thing. PS SAT scores are also looked at in what percentage of students in state take them. More students probably take the SAT’s in Maine; thereby lowering the score. The way I see it is that Maine, NH, and VT have it going on.

  132. Anonymous says:

    Washington should be on this list for serial killers.

  133. Abbie says:

    this map is really lame. it’s so obvious why maine would have the lowest SAT scores, and it has nothing to do with the overall population’s intelligence. and i’m still trying to figure out why having a high abortion rate is something to be ashamed of. i think this is supposed to be funny, but it’s just really uninteresting and not thought out well.

  134. James T says:

    Actually, the information on Maine is very biased. If you look at the information cited, Maine has the lowest SAT scores, but that is only because of state legislature that forces every high school student in the state to take the SATs. If you compare it to some of the other states with the highest scores, they only have 3% participation and those are only the students who are motivated/smart enough who WANT to take the SATs.

  135. Anonymous says:

    For those of you who are hung up on spelling I suggest you read “Undaunted Courage” by Stephen Ambrose. A very good read, but my point is that Lewis & Clark rarely spelled the the same word the same way even in the same sentence , but the meaning was always clear. Is’nt that the point ? I too used to be “hung up” on correct spelling, but that account of their journey changed my way of thinking of the importance (rather non-importance) of spelling.

  136. Arizona’s been getting such a bad rap lately, I was actually relieved to see we were the state with the most alcoholics. How sad is that?

  137. Sean Preston says:

    Nice work. I’d just like to point out you left Denver off your alpha-description list (i.e. rationale and descriptions) following the map.



  138. Brad Hahn says:

    “Louisiana – The Gonorrhea State”

    Great license plate slogan.

  139. Masshole says:

    Massachusetts aka Taxachusetts has the worst drivers & the highest taxes. Did I forget to mention corruption. Big dig…wtf

  140. Brandaman says:

    Disclaimer: I’m a white guy and I live in LA County CA

    Re: Texas
    LAUSD has a 60% dropout rate.
    The Bay area with a disproportionately high population of Asians (the highest achieving scholastic and highest earning per capita demographic) bumps up the numbers .

    These stats are from 2004.

    Many people with half a brain and the means in Cali have moved to Texas.

    • Anonymous says:

      Someone ALWAYS has to hate on California, no matter where and when. LAUSD does not have a 60 percent drop out rate you imbecile, it’s 39. Although it still is high up there, 39 is not as bad as 60. And NO ONE that i know has moved to Texas. No one…….

  141. ghost ornamental says:

    the categories for New Hampshire and Ohio aren’t that bad, and the only reason Oregon has such a high homeless population is that its superior social services draw them from other states.

  142. James Poole says:

    So, my home state, South Carolina, has the most mobile homes. Who’s this a problem for? Snobs?

  143. Kikki says:

    This is bogus crap, Wysaki, and you know it. Do you teach in the public school system? Who added the bullsh-t… you? I just got an identical map of the U.S. called, “The United States of Awesome” with guess what?… GOOD things about each state. Go play with your cheesy art program somewhere else, worm.

  144. John Bonanno says:

    The State of Maine has its problems (see my blog post )
    But it may be a little unfair to proclaim it the “Dumbest State”. Maine requires ALL high school students, even the most educationally challenged, to take the SAT test. It has the highest participation rate in the country. In other states it is optional and participation can be as low as 3% (the Dakotas). When only the brightest students with college ambitions take the test the results will be skewed, indicating a higher level of potential in such states.

  145. Jesse says:

    One: Don’t pick on Ohio, there is nothing wrong with being nerdy.
    Two: Florida has the most tornadoes. Florida gets a lot of supercells and hurricanes. Both produce tornadoes.

  146. JamieG99 says:

    Utah must be the worst at not knowing that you don’t need to buy porn anymore.

  147. shario1 says:

    Reading these was funny as hell. Thanks! LOL. I had a really good time!

  148. toni says:

    “The greatest destroyer of peace is abortion because if a mother can kill her own child, what is left for me to kill you and you to kill me? There is nothing between.”
    -Mother Teresa

  149. bob says:

    toni, who the fuck quotes mother teresa. You Suck!!!!!!!!!!

  150. Mofro says:

    It figures I would teach in NC

  151. James says:

    Do One for Australia >:D

  152. AbC says:

    Hello people im from Kentucky….and let me make this clear about my state…
    1. Smoking isnt allowed in restaurants anymore. its a law.
    2. We do not sleep with our cousins…thats just nasty…and i have no idea where that came from, its idiotic.
    3. why is everyone slamming on other states for…its quite stupid.

  153. Lola says:

    Really? Beastiality? That’s the best you have on us? First off, ok we have some freaks but what country doesn’t? And only 4 cases. Really? Let’s face the real facts here, you couldn’t find anything on Washington so you pulled out some random crap out.

    • Oregon Beach Gramma says:

      Massachusettes already took the “worst driver” designation. Try driving in the RIGHT lane, Washington!

  154. matthewrodney says:

    Maine being labelled the ‘dumbest state’ is entirely based on bad information. Looking at the link which shows Maine scored the lowest on the SAT will also show you that there is a strong correlation between the participation rate and the average scores. Iowa, with the highest average score also is tied for the lowest participation rate, while Maine with the lowest average score has the highest participation rate. So that is a bad interpretation of data.

    • pmcg says:

      In recent years the state has replaced its own standardized test for 11th grade with the SATs and paying for it to be administered to encourage students who might otherwise not be thinking of university to do so.

  155. Anonymous says:

    what does ohio have that the other states do not?????????

  156. LMFAO says:

    Lol why am I not surprised by Alaska having the highest rate of suicide? Of course you want to kill yourself when you live there o_O Sure Alaska is beautiful but still… A place I would like to visit, but not live in, sorry Alaskans!

  157. Bryan says:

    I know others here have called it out but seriously?!?! Excuse me but how the heck is going to the library an “unsavory category”. Thanks for supporting the drive towards Idiocracy. :(

  158. tiger fan says:

    You might want to check into the incest rate in Ohio. According to Ann Rule, Ohio has more than it’s fair share.

  159. D Larson says:

    Vermont isn’t infertile, it is just one of the most educated states. Educated people realize there is a problem with overpopulation and choose not to have kids. I bet West Virginia, Mississippi, Tennessee or Alabama has some of the highest birthrates!

  160. KidMoney says:

    OK, some of these are not really bad, like:
    (from west to east)
    Washington: I cant decide between a cow and a horse…
    Idaho: At least I don’t have to worry about cops every day…
    New Mexico: Who needs people? (see Washington…)
    Iowa: It’s good that people have good long lives there…
    Ohio: I LOVE being able to use the library whenever I want…
    South Carolina: Some people like having no mortgage and want freedom to move whenever they want…
    Delaware: Better for a baby to be killed than be born to someone who cannot/will not raise it properly

    And yes, I live in one of these states…

  161. S. Spacek says:

    Kentucky WORST, “Dirtiest” U.S. state (#50) for least clean public spaces and poorest litter removals, according to 2011 American State litter Scorecard.

  162. Allergic2Haters says:

    Its true about what they said about Massachusetts also the ppl in MASS are real MASSHOLES..

  163. Anonymous says:

    Look at Maines ACT scores. One of the highest in the nation. Hardly the “dumbest” state.

  164. New York says:

    I think New Jersey deserves Worst Drivers. Anyone see them drive before?

  165. Yoooo says:

    Delaware also got the hottest women, cant forget that

  166. LostInThought says:

    I find it strange that they generalized it into “porn usage” for Utah, Utah has the most online subscriptions to porn sites that doesn’t equal to the most porn usage.

  167. S. Spacek says:

    KENTUCKY #1 WORST state (poor public spaces cleanliness, litter control, related environmetanl performances) in 2011 American State Litter Scorecard.

  168. I grew up in Fairmont, WV and was injured by a car in October 1968. Today, I live in Morgantown, WV following a move, 7\94 to Marjorie Gardens, and I currently live at, 3180 Collins Ferry Road, Morgantown, WV 26505. By 2001 I mentioned to my current therapist Anne, of Freemouw Psychological on Van Voorhis Road, that I had enough of christianity, wanting to associate with a fellowship of nice down to earth people. So, I went to the Unitarian church on Warwick Street, as Mike gave a Pagan ritual that evening. I then met Eileen Dinardo, in Wheeling, WV from, Washington, PA. as she’s the organizer of the Wheeling Witches Meetup, and my other friend Lisa lives in, Point Marion, PA. after I traveled with her for about a year & a half to Wheeling, WV.

  169. Artiewhitefox says:

    Non human animals are very horny, and are unashamed about sex, and understand more about sex than you think. Rather than make war with the zoosexual, and other sexualities make peace. I have said make peace probably about an octillion times, but predictably like talking to devils they ignore me. Prove to me you can resist the devil and make peace with the zoo, and whoever else too.

  170. Andrea says:

    As a former New Yorker, I love that the worst thing they could find was a long commute! For years NY had re crime, drugs, driving when actually crime is way down, they are excellent drivers compared to other states I’ve lived in and seeing Colorado as the cocaine capital of the nation was strange! Now I live in Florida and yes, had my identity stolen here the 2nd year after I moved. It’s a huge issue in FL.

  171. dylan says:

    some of these are funny some of these are sad like the nerdiest state that one is kinda of funny but the cancer deaths is gets to me b/c some1 rly close to me died b/c of that i live in indiana now everybody i no met and see is extremely up tight on money including me

  172. India says:

    Never have I ever seen such an artistic and CLEARLY tongue-in-cheek blog post followed by such a crazy amount of ignorant comments! If you really love your state, you’ll be able to poke a little fun at it, right?

  173. zach says:

    Maine is ranked 5th for smartest states in America..

  174. Eric says:

    This is a very funny visual representation of the
    cost of living by state

    My wife was just talking about how sad it would be to have to live in Alaska..Think she might have been on to something.
    Great work!

  175. bob says:

    you are a prick and suck my nans muncy sperm

  176. tropicalDJL92 says:

    That is not a good measure to measure Maine’s inteligence since it is mandatory for all hs juniors to take the SATs no matter what. In other states only kids who feel like they have a chance of going off to higher education take the SATs. So only other states smarter youth take them.

  177. Ali says:

    personally worst drivers should be split betwean massachustees and connecticut……… they are the absolute worst drivers……. if you founs anuy misspellings, my dog was lickung me wen i typed thid

  178. Pennsylvania says:

    I Swap Arson for Beastiality any day! x3

  179. nicole says:

    Maine makes every kid take the Sat, whether or not they want to go to college so some kids just don’t try and thats why the scores look so bad

  180. New Hampshire has the highest rate of corporate taxes? This is a good thing: we should all be applauding their courage.

  181. I like cheese so you cant tell me what to do yeah yeah yeah

  182. A.J. says:

    Was wondering why this one had so many comments compared to everything else on here, but then I noticed on page 363 of your tumblr that Kelly Osbourne tweeted about it. It’s all making sense now.

    Love your site, by the way. It’s hilarious. Keep it up! :)

  183. abrar najeeb says:

    alone united states more than 200000 reported rape cases, i just can not understand , what bloody democracy is in USA, have some shame you beasts

  184. abrar najeeb says:

    total number of reported crimes in united states in year 2008, are 12500000,
    total number of murders are 16000
    total number of rapes are 90000
    robberies are 2200000
    vehicles hijack are 956000
    theft are 6500000
    the total population of united states is around 3oooooooo,

    this is the conduction of united states

    • JOLENE says:

      It’s because the men in this country are so screwed up. Can’t deny it becasue there is more crime committed by men.

  185. Green Bay, born and raised says:

    Let’s party on, Wisconsin!

  186. Washington says:

    No The Worst Drivers Nationally is Washington State. Take it from an OTR Driver with over One Million Drive miles who has driven in every state and the Vast Majority of lower Canada, since 1993. Just setting the record straight here.

  187. Zane says:

    I think Tennessee’s should’ve been “Country Music”.

  188. amanda says:

    This is the worst thing I have ever seen! People are already ridiculed for their mistakes enough! you don’t to make everyone one in this whole country feel bad!!!!!
    0 ()

  189. Anonymous says:

    How exactly is having the largest number of library visits a bad thing for Ohio? Just sayin’. Lol. AND, it just so happens that Missouri has the highest number of meth labs, with Indiana being a way too close second.

  190. Katie says:

    Wait… so “least government influence” is a bad thing???!

    • Katie ^AGAIN LOL says:

      And “most mobile homes” isn’t a bad thing, either. It means that people in my state at least don’t live above their means. I think it speaks to a low pretentiousness level rather than a low class level.

  191. JOLENE says:

    I am surprised Wyoming wasn’t known for its high use of Meth. Or for being the most female unfriendly state despite the fact the state motto is “The Equality State”.

  192. Michelle says:

    Minnesota is the only state with a problem that is not due to man or man-made or is a problem because of the choices a person makes. Go us!!!!! It seems that Ohio has the highest population of readers (because of the library usage); why is that a bad thing? Iowans live a long time; how is that bad? What is the shame with these 3 states?

  193. Kitty says:

    I actually find it bad that when i read montana most drunk driving I was like that is so true and i find i tfunny beause i live in montana

  194. Anonymous says:

    California and Oklahoma, goodness gracious, who knew? Maybe the ladies in that little stretch of the OK panhandle are driving the coke in from Texas.

    And Ol’ Virginny, there are so many more worsts I could add, like “Still hunts with packs of dogs, still pens foxes, most counties named after Kings, Queens & Assorted Lords of England, most entitled white people who think they still live in Merrie Olde England and therefore ride English and go on drunken Fox Hunts. And that’s just in Albemarle County.

  195. deebeazy says:

    Am I the only one who noticed that you mixed up the Dakotas?

    You have North Dakota listed as “Ugliest residents” on your map. However, the link you provide to TheDailyBeast’s article ranking the most and least attractive states does not mention North Dakota at all. It’s SOUTH Dakota that they ranked at the bottom of the barrel!

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