1. Won’t let you anywhere near the locked trapdoor under his bed
2. Framed photos of himself are pixelated
3. Insists on writing grocery lists “ransom note” style
4. Hobbies include watching kids play at the park and digging at night
5. There’s a human head in the vegetable crisper
6. Chore wheel has you cleaning chainsaws every other week
7. “Help me!” messages written all over your bathroom mirror
8. Shrill, maniacal laugh keeps you up at night
9. Refuses to return Dexter DVDs to Netflix
10. For Halloween costume parties, shows up as himself
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If you liked this, then other humor blog posts you may like include:
- Still More Street Advertisements
- Top Ten Signs Your College Professor Is A Spy
- How To Become A Princess
What about waking up in the middle of the night to him or her staring at you?
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