Jeff Wysaski
When you find food in your fridge that’s been in there for months:
When people hold the door open for you and you’re a million miles away from them:
When you see someone picking on your younger sibling:
When a movie trailer spoils the movie:
When you wake up on your birthday:
When a website asks if you’d like to take part in a brief survey:
When you prove someone wrong so you decide to rub it in their face:
When you try and log off the Internet:
When you guess the Wheel of Fortune puzzle before the contestants:
When you open your car door on a really hot day:
When you accidentally make eye contact with someone multiple times:
When your friends come to you for advice:
When you watch people eating food you don’t like:
When you hear your favorite song playing in the other room:
When you spell a word so badly that spellcheck has no suggestions:
When you’re at someone’s house and you break something:
When someone lurks over your shoulder and won’t go away:
When old people try to be cool:
Most of these come from here, here and here. I came up with a few on my own.