18 Completely Unnecessary Warning Labels

The warning labels think we’re all very, very stupid… [via smosh]

30 responses to 18 Completely Unnecessary Warning Labels

    1. And 99.9% of humans are not equipped well enough to handle such a feat.

      Now, put your jam on your toast and put it under your left arm.

  1. How many people went over the railing at that hotel before they posted the sign?

    Maybe the hotel is on a hill and the door is on the ground floor? Can’t figure out that one.

    1. One person fell, probably because they were drunk, but it was the hotel’s fault because no warning. You can thank plaintiff attorneys for most if these warnings.

  2. It’s sad that there were so many people that were stupid enough to do all this shit so often that they needed to have warning labels on everything.

  3. I saw a documentary about a man who wasn’t careful with his zipper, had an incident with said zipper, and later on he fucked a pie.

    1. That’s…

      That’s two different movies.

      Are you trolling or stupid?

      I mean, I know you’ll SAY you’re trolling when confronted.

      But ask YOURSELF that.

      Trolling?

      Or stupid?

  4. I have a sweater just like that one.

    It’s great!

    Only problem is that I need to take it off at dusk and dawn or else it bursts into flames.

  5. OKAY STOP!

    STOP!!!

    Everyone stop, cause this shit needs to end.

    This is going to be long, but I promise it will be worth the read.

    The whole hot coffee lawsuit thing is a complete smear job by McDonald’s against Stella Liebeck.

    What everyone THINKS they know:

    Some frumpy lady spilled deliberately spilled coffee on herself and sued McDonald’s for millions for a minor burn and now all coffee cups are now forced to say “Caution: Hot”.

    NOT TRUE.

    NOT EVEN FUCKING CLOSE!

    What REALLY happened was that an 80 year old woman spilled searing hot coffee on her lap, causing sever burns to her thighs and gentiles. The coffee was WELL above safe temperatures and she needed multiple skin grafts, surgeries, and was in severe pain for the rest of her life. Go ahead and image search “Stella Liebeck” if you want to see the extent of the injury. It’s fucking horrible.

    The family sued McDonald’s for 80% of the medical bills after insurance since they felt that 20% of the fault was on them. She did not add “pain and suffering”. In total they sued for something like $120,000.

    However, when McDonald’s came into the court the straight up bullied the family and threatened a counter suit and made a mockery of the case.

    The judge, NOT THE FAMILY OR THEIR LAWYER, saw that McDonald’s had multiple (like hundreds) of incidents of McDonald’s coffee injuring people and that they had been ignoring this issue for over a decade.

    So the judge adjusted the claim to one day’s worth of coffee sales. Again, not the family.

    That happened to turn out to be millions of dollars.

    BUT IT DOESN’T END THERE!

    No!

    McDonald’s was fucking HORRIBLE to Stella Liebeck and her family.

    The first thing they did was make a smear campaign against Stella Liebeck. They went to the media and helped start the story you probably know today. They’re one of the biggest advertisers and they threw all of their weight everywhere to run this lie of a story.

    They were doing it to discredit Stella Liebeck for the appeals process and to discourage further would be lawsuits.

    OH, and as for Stella Liebeck. Well she died of medical complications that included the burn before receiving one fucking penny because McDonald’s straight up refused to pay.

    And they STILL haven’t paid!

    Okay, I’m done.

    1. Well you’re wrong on a few counts. For one, Ms. Liebeck was 91 when she died. The medical issues and just the legal drama took their toll on her, according to a relative, but she was 91. It’s not like she died tragically as a young person, lots of old people die just because they’re old. And McDonald’s settled with her out of court in 1994 so I’m not sure where the “AND THEY STILL HAVEN’T PAID” comment comes from.

      Yes, the whole case gets treated like some dumb idiot woman stupidly poured hot coffee in her lap when the issue was that the coffee was dangerously hot… But don’t put hot coffee in your lap in your car, that’s still stupid even if the coffee is body temperature instead of 180 degrees.

    2. Honestly. It depends on whose side you are on. Personally I don’t think it’s McD’s fault if you spill your coffee on yourself. The whole damn world knows if they order hot coffee it will generally be hot.

      1. Third degree burns. That’s outrageously hot. Molten metal hot. McDonalds knew about the problem and did nothing to rectify it.

      2. She didn’t sue because she spilled coffee on herself, though. She sued because the coffee was TOO HOT. If she hadn’t spilled any and had simply put it to her mouth to drink, she would have burned her mouth. Same issue. The coffee was dangerously hot.

  6. I know the lololol for the straightening iron is supposed to be the “no contact with eyes” part, but how about that is says “not for household use” on it? The fuck?

    1. Yes,but it’s only in Canada that it’s “not for household use” and I think we all know it’s because the vast majority of Canadians would try to straighten their eyelashes, so they had to make a blanket statement for the entire country

  7. Thank you for the Stella Liebeck explanation. One question…. why would she have coffee near her thighs and non Jewish people? I mean, that’s pretty specific. How many people did she have in that car with her? And what were they doing that close to her thighs?

  8. Thank you for the Stella Liebeck explanation. One question…. why would she have coffee near her thighs and non Jewish people? I mean, that’s pretty specific. How many people did she have in that car with her? And what were they doing that close to her thighs? Okay, two questions – how freaking hot was that coffee to sever her thighs with burns? What was in that cup? Thermite?

    1. Yep, so many questions. Also, after you make a brilliant post and click submit, sometimes it takes a while for the comment to show up, especially when they’re so excellent! A good idea is to copy it to the clipboard. That way, if it doesn’t show up immediately you can paste the exact same text and click submit again 2 minutes later! Either that, or you retype your reply that you neatly wrote down on a piece of loose foolscap paper. Cheerio!!

  9. Actually Stella’s son was driving the car. They got the coffee in the drive through lane. He parked the car and she took the lid off of the coffee to add sweetener – this was before they did it for you, fun fact, they started adding the sweetener and creamer after this incident. So this sweet old lady was sitting in the passenger seat of a non-moving vehicle and removes the lid from the coffee cup to add a little the hot coffee splashes her hand and it is so freaking hot that she dropped the cup causing it land in her lap and cause the injuries.
    The doctors that treated her say that the coffee had to be well over 220 degrees F in order to the damage that it did. Most coffee is served around 170-180 degrees F. McDonalds has a history of these injuries because they serve their coffee so hot.
    It is sad, but Ms. Leibeck was not at fault.

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