If you’re on a bad date you might as well get a good story out of it. [via ebaumsworld]
42 responses to 20 Hilarious Reasons People Didn’t Go On Second Dates
I was a little bit down on the people who gave petty reasons for breaking up with a significant other in an earlier post. But these are pretty much all thoroughly justified. Constant mispronunciation and misuse of words, in particular, would drive me out of my damn mind.
Also, I’d totally be willing to pass up a second date with someone if it meant getting to the bottom of their deathly fear of spoons.
And if you’re the sort of guy who shows up to a first date wearing tie-die and a bowler hat, good on you for having a unique sense of self, but you’re looking for a very particular kind of woman. It should be abundantly obvious whether or not you’ve found that kind before you show up at her door.
“If it meant getting to the bottom of …” This is so true. I once was at a dinner where spaghetti was served and one of the grown-ass men there explained he couldn’t eat with us due to an “incident” he’d had with spaghetti when he was a kid. I didn’t ask any of the dozens of questions racing through my mind and I regret it to this day.
I once walked out on a date because the guy kept dipping his fries in my ketchup.
There is no excuse for anyone to drag their food across my plate. There was a bottle of ketchup on the table and plenty of room on his plate to get his own effing ketchup.
Didn’t go on a 2nd date because he showed up to the nice restaurant wearing a gym shirt with cutout sides that didn’t have enough surface area to cover both of his nipples at once. I felt like they were watching me, like Mona Lisa’s eyes.
I love the great web of internet connectivity. I’m here on my break from reading Reddit to read a post a different site culled from Reddit which was re-culled for my enjoyment here. And like 90% of the stuff I see here from Reddit I never saw there. Win/win.
To all the guys wondering why a girl snubbed them after the first date: Check your teeth, your shoes, & your scent. There’s at least a 50% chance it was one of those.
Didn’t go on a 2nd date with a girl because she was mostly interested in sex and I was mostly interested in romance. Hard decision because I really liked her.
I’m concerned that a bowler hat and tie dye shirt doesn’t even sound that unusual. Have I become jaded by an increasingly bizarre and outlandish fashion industry or…have I become that guy?
I was a little bit down on the people who gave petty reasons for breaking up with a significant other in an earlier post. But these are pretty much all thoroughly justified. Constant mispronunciation and misuse of words, in particular, would drive me out of my damn mind.
Also, I’d totally be willing to pass up a second date with someone if it meant getting to the bottom of their deathly fear of spoons.
And if you’re the sort of guy who shows up to a first date wearing tie-die and a bowler hat, good on you for having a unique sense of self, but you’re looking for a very particular kind of woman. It should be abundantly obvious whether or not you’ve found that kind before you show up at her door.
“If it meant getting to the bottom of …” This is so true. I once was at a dinner where spaghetti was served and one of the grown-ass men there explained he couldn’t eat with us due to an “incident” he’d had with spaghetti when he was a kid. I didn’t ask any of the dozens of questions racing through my mind and I regret it to this day.
We don’t talk about “the spaghetti incident” any more…
Edward, I completely agree with you on all counts. Also, hi. I’m single. I have no fear of spoons. Let’s go on a date. 🙂
tried to say this before – edward, i’m with you on all counts. let’s date.
Tits or GTFO
Please note that the post above may or may not be from the “real” Edward.
I’ve had koutaliaphobia since I was 2. It ain’t hilarious.
Please go on!
I once walked out on a date because the guy kept dipping his fries in my ketchup.
There is no excuse for anyone to drag their food across my plate. There was a bottle of ketchup on the table and plenty of room on his plate to get his own effing ketchup.
This is double entendre gold.
Didn’t go on a 2nd date because he showed up to the nice restaurant wearing a gym shirt with cutout sides that didn’t have enough surface area to cover both of his nipples at once. I felt like they were watching me, like Mona Lisa’s eyes.
Also, if I can’t wear my nipples out on a first date, then neither should he out of sympathy!
if we ever went on a date, i’d allow you to wear your nipples however you pleased. I’m a gentleman like that
The Jaws one is extremely petty.
yeah but he has a point, anyone who thinks jaws is a terrible movie clearly has crap taste, so why bother.
Was it really necessary to explode the poor shark?! They movie could’ve been ended much quicker with a bucket of chum and some poison
I love the great web of internet connectivity. I’m here on my break from reading Reddit to read a post a different site culled from Reddit which was re-culled for my enjoyment here. And like 90% of the stuff I see here from Reddit I never saw there. Win/win.
OhmywordstopsayingReddit!
Would you prefer lightly fried fish fillets?
Jqb – LOL well played!
…wha … what’s wrong with saying doggo? 🙁
doggo
The cheese one reminds me of Charlie eating a block of cheese before a date on It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia.
I would date a girl who drinks fight milk! Or anyone really.
Or milksteak?
Would you date a girl that wears kitten mittens?
“Having me on”
Personally, I don’t want this to be a thing.
It’s a British thing
It’s already a Brit thing, sorry!
To all the guys wondering why a girl snubbed them after the first date: Check your teeth, your shoes, & your scent. There’s at least a 50% chance it was one of those.
What are you supposed to check for with your shoes?
Asking for a friend.
Are they dirty or worn out? Both are problematic.
Girls aren’t impressed by money-saving techniques?
Dirty or worn out is less problematic to me than -does it go with your outfit & what does it say about your style and taste?
Dude acting like he’s offering to pay when he’s actually asking you to pay = Very rude
Bowler hat and tie shirt? Clockwork Orange?
Justified.
Was a great show.
…Her grandma dated Donald Trump?
How much cheese is too much cheese?
Didn’t go on a 2nd date with a girl because she was mostly interested in sex and I was mostly interested in romance. Hard decision because I really liked her.
I’m concerned that a bowler hat and tie dye shirt doesn’t even sound that unusual. Have I become jaded by an increasingly bizarre and outlandish fashion industry or…have I become that guy?