Jeff Wysaski
There’s important Twitter accounts, and then there’s Pigeon Cop…
POLICE CHIEF: Anyone seen those discarded French fries that were supposed to be logged into evidence?
PIGEON COP: [hops onto a short fence]
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 15, 2014
HEY did you just litter you motherfu— oh wow there's still chips in here [walks into bag and gets it stuck on my head]
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 18, 2014
Good Cop: License and registration please.
Pigeon Cop: [Just shits all over the windshield]
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 17, 2014
hey HEY stop right there! [human takes one step towards me and I get scared and fly away at 100mph]
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 17, 2014
[Looking at white poop on a car]
Boys, this could be evidence. Lets get-
[Looks up at partner in tree above car]
"That was me sorry chief"— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 16, 2014
[Pigeon cop in bed with his wife]
Wife: Sorry, I've dropped some crumbs in the bed.
Pigeon Cop: …
Wife: …
Pigeon Cop: Did you say crumbs— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 17, 2014
one thing I ain't is a bent cop. I don't take no bribes [a criminal offers me some smashed up stale bagels] wow thanks ur totally free to go
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 11, 2014
there's a lot of crime on these streets….. [low cooing sound]….. and not enough bread crumbs
— Pigeon Cop (@PigeonCop) November 11, 2014
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