Jeff Wysaski
A lot of these jokes are so stupid that they’re smart…
This cape is reversible but my decision to wear it to the custody hearing is not.
— ceej (@ceejoyner) March 25, 2015
https://twitter.com/TeknoGeisha/status/576006333037699072
https://twitter.com/shutupmikeginn/status/503217643793678336
Every truck is a food truck if you're a cannibal
— Megan Amram (@meganamram) March 27, 2015
Imagine what your life could be like if you didn't click back and forth between the same five websites everyday longing for death.
— Amanda Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) February 7, 2015
https://twitter.com/trentistweeting/status/581595706562981888
https://twitter.com/hippieswordfish/status/582288936854102016
https://twitter.com/pinupteacher/status/580525671321047040
https://twitter.com/peeznuts/status/569710694414692354
"Chest, chest, chest and chest, chest and chest" – T-Rex singing "Head, shoulders, knees and toes".
— Mat (@MatCro) March 25, 2015
A parent's job is basically a daily struggle to help a crazy person stay alive.
— Jeremy ButtShaker (@iLikeCatShirts) February 9, 2015
He tripped, and the laundry basket fell to floor, spilling clothes everywhere.
I sat back and watched it all unfold.
— Princess Buttercup (@GoldenSpirals) February 15, 2015
https://twitter.com/msdanifernandez/status/552345072294191104
[Spelling Bee]
Judge: Your word is 'babe'
Bee: B-A-E
J: Sorry. There's another 'B'
Bee: WHAT! WHERE?
*goes crazy*
*stings Judge*
*dies*— KattsDogma (@KattsDogma) March 25, 2015
I know I've said this before but the amount of time I save saying "celeb" instead of celebrity is incredible. I may start a second family
— slick (@dlicj) March 25, 2015