Mike
Start your week of right with these exceptional tweets.
https://twitter.com/DustinAHarkins/status/469850780480966656
Jaiymes and the organic peach
— mike ginn (@shutupmikeginn) November 8, 2015
My weight loss goal is to not care about the crumbs at the bottom of a Pringles can.
— Oren S'wagner (@MrOrenWagner) August 11, 2014
i like how at this walmart they put baby food products in the checkout lane. like oops thats right i have a baby to feed
— eric curtin (@dubstep4dads) March 28, 2014
R.I.P. Trix Rabbit. Met him in 2001. Never could conquer his demons. In a better place now. Respect.
— George Wallace (@MrGeorgeWallace) November 3, 2015
I'm sorry I pet your baby like a dog. I didn't know what else to do with it.
— Daniel Carrillo (@DanielRCarrillo) October 30, 2015
An armadillo? Wait, you mean highway lobster?
— Tyler (@BeerBatterBeard) August 2, 2014
https://twitter.com/WigCannon/status/660709206958465024
caught my dog eating a rock again maybe he knows something i dont about rocks
— meatshirt (@prettysadmostly) November 1, 2015
GOD: (creates earth) hell yea lizard planet!
WINDOWS™: restart planet for important updates
GOD: um ok
*dinos die, man appears*
GOD: wtf
— Blind Chow (@BlindChow) October 31, 2015
"You like mayonnaise? Prove it." – Costco
— chRis (@seethenare) February 23, 2015
Plagiarism is bad? Change a few words, that shit is yours. It's like when you change a baby's clothes- new baby. New baby that's yours now.
— crappystuffforjerks (@somecleverthing) October 30, 2015
https://twitter.com/yerpalmildsauce/status/613744158969348096
https://twitter.com/McNorfin/status/662828148967366656
https://twitter.com/markleggett/status/658230196177268736