Mike
I’ve been on twitter for years and it never ceases to amaze me how every week I can find 15 new and hilarious tweets to share with you guys. Enjoy.
1.
https://twitter.com/normsousa/status/584025904868761600
2.
I wonder if I'd have a better time on the internet if I didn't exclusively visit websites that make me mad
— Bridger Winegar (@bridger_w) January 11, 2018
3.
Age ain't nothing but a number indicating how long you've been alive or how embarrassed you should be about what you haven't accomplished.
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) May 21, 2015
4.
"The Twilight Zone" makes me long for the days when you could smoke on a spaceship.
— Chris Murphy (@chrismurphyusa) January 1, 2013
5.
when u do your hair for brunch and they cancel pic.twitter.com/48hskgDdBD
— Amanda Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) January 13, 2018
6.
Because you watched Longmire
– Broadchurch
– Grandbroth
– Deepgirth
– Widegoth
– Largeteen
– Stoutdick
– Lutefisk— Jeff 🇵🇸 (@usedwigs) December 14, 2017
7.
someone should invent a video game that teaches empathy
— JennyPentland, GED (@JennyPentland) January 12, 2018
8.
https://twitter.com/Kendragarden/status/294841197527179264
9.
https://twitter.com/morninggloria/status/952293879553945601
10.
If you know a couple named Shannon and Kevin, I think they just broke up at Target.
— shauna (@goldengateblond) October 4, 2014
11.
[accompanied by two keyboardists, ten backup dancers, laser light show and fog machine] No.
— Gretchen von Tongeln (@Metalligretch) January 10, 2018
12.
https://twitter.com/FeralCrone/status/936372772892282880
13.
This looks like an incredibly interesting and possibly life-changing article I would like to read.
[waits 1.5 seconds as it loads]
Fuck this bullshit article
— Ari Scott (@ariscott) November 29, 2017
14.
“Sorry, could I just squeeze by?”
<person doesn’t move an inch>
“Thanks”
— VeryBritishProblems (@SoVeryBritish) January 13, 2018
15.
If I can just be patient and hang on for a few more hours, I think I can waste my entire day
— Bridger Winegar (@bridger_w) January 12, 2018