Lindsey Robertson
Every day, society expects us to peel ourselves away from the giant, soft, warm rectangle in our bedrooms and go out into cold, cruel world and be productive in some way. It’s straight-up ridiculous. What, like outside is better than our bed, the safe haven in which we dream and screw around and watch viral videos?
While many people are willing to play along with this elaborate ruse, there are some of us who just wish that we could spend the entire day in bed, lounging and sleeping to our tired little heart’s content. (I’m actually tempted to call us “Night Stans” because how much we stan for sleeping.)
If you are one of these snuggly, sleepy folks, then please direct your attention to these tweets, which are especially for you. The world may want you to “rise” and “shine,” but you and I both know that you can shine perfectly well while taking a nap, thankyouverymuch.
1.
"You've made your bed, now lie in it"
yes omg i love naps
— bananafanafofisa (@lisaxy424) May 10, 2015
2.
https://twitter.com/TheTumblrPosts/status/650067790146195457
3.
https://twitter.com/devinphysique/status/666314106752798720
4.
Every morning when my alarm goes off, I think "This is the worst thing that has EVER happened."
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) June 10, 2013
5.
outside of bed: cold, refrigerated pale dough
inside of bed: warm, flaky biscuit with beautiful melty slice of butter
— Matt Bellassai (@MattBellassai) October 6, 2014
6.
Naps, the original life hack:
1) Sad? There's a nap for that.
2) Tired? There's a nap for that.
3) Angry? There's a nap for that.— The Cultured Ruffian (@CulturedRuffian) June 1, 2016
7.
Me: *wakes up*
Me: I need a nap— christian delgrosso (@christiand) May 30, 2016
8.
https://twitter.com/GirlsBibIe/status/905394981682069504
9.
If we ALL go back to bed, there's nothing they can do.
— Mike Birbiglia (@birbigs) November 4, 2013
10.
https://twitter.com/WheelTod/status/581411889038643201
11.
I’m up early and full of energy, but don’t worry. I am going to overcome this and stay in bed.
— Josh Gondelman (@joshgondelman) January 24, 2018
12.
https://twitter.com/ChloeAngyal/status/655740394362249216
13.
https://twitter.com/InternetHippo/status/638880157730639872
14.
https://twitter.com/comedyorjoke/status/640569148880236544
15.
https://twitter.com/slaughthie/status/561245470698520576
16.
*rolls out of bed*
*rolls into other strategically placed bed*
"Nice."— Slam Squat-Thrust (@Gre_Gone) June 11, 2014
17.
A snail can sleep for up to 3 years. I didn't know it was even possible to be this jealous.
— The Alicianater (@leechee420) January 31, 2014
18.
Prince Charming: I will awaken her with love's sweet ki–
Sleeping Beauty: five more minutes— Todd 'Papi' Carlos (@TheToddWilliams) May 27, 2015
19.
users guide to telling ppl ur late:
"walking now" = havent left yet
"on my way sry!" = im not coming
"sorry leaving now" = im going to sleep— jonny sun (@jonnysun) October 8, 2014
20.
rihanna: work work work work work
me: no i am tired actually
— eric curtin (@dubstep4dads) June 14, 2016