Lindsey Robertson
Inside almost every person who claims to be totally skeptical about horoscopes is a secret inner voice that says “But let me check mine … just in case.”
Hey, it’s a crazy, unpredictable world out there. Sometimes it’s helpful to feel like you have some semblance of perspective on the whole thing — and if that involves star signs, then you do you, fam. Haters will say astrology is fake, but you can always just write them off by saying “Ugh, typical Aquarius.”
Here are some jokes for everyone out there who holds a vague, tenuous belief in horoscopes, but feels a bit too sheepish to admit it in public. If you’ve ever secretly looked up your crush’s zodiac to check your compatibility, blamed any stress on Mercury in retrograde, or wrinkled your nose upon meeting a Gemini, then these memes are calling your name (regardless of your star sign).
Don’t worry, you’re not alone — we’re all secretly looking to blame our sh*t on glowing balls of gas in the sky.
1.
https://twitter.com/SheeeRatchet/status/776191724909531136
2.
https://twitter.com/MedievaI_React/status/829243894709760000
3.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BaIXvjwD9Bj/?tagged=astrologymemes
4.
the worst part about liking someone is having to read their horoscope too
— real winner (@jaredtbh) November 12, 2015
5.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BY64E5WB5Lb/?tagged=astrologymemes
6.
*uses my one phone call from jail to check my horoscope*
— Arby’s Provocateur (@SamGrittner) January 8, 2015
7.
https://twitter.com/kvttycat/status/633020867488837632
8.
"i like you because when i look at horoscope predictions, i check yours too."
— rena (@renalovelis) October 31, 2015
9.
https://twitter.com/ellaceron/status/661000763586531328
10.
https://twitter.com/BoobsRadley/status/303518691004391424
11.
horoscope: taurus breathes air to survive
me, a taurus: wtfff that is so me im so freaked out right now you guys horoscopes are my religion— gary from teen mom (@garyfromteenmom) November 28, 2015
12.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BWbXU53BVSX/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=embed_ufi_test
13.
https://twitter.com/comedyandtruth/status/790613975910248448
14.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BOok_0Lgmew/
15.
https://twitter.com/chanelpuke/status/784152021217730561
16.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BL24hn8FQpw/
17.
*checks my horoscope to see if there's an explanation for today's suffering*
— charlotte shevchenko knight (@shevchenkonight) April 25, 2016
18.
https://twitter.com/freddyamazin/status/778050101608521728
19.
Astrology is like the one acceptable form of prejudice
— Mara Wilson (@MaraWilson) November 7, 2015
20.
thought it was my zodiac sign that made me irritable, impulsive, impatient, and angry but really it's just my depression
— t (@w_t__w) December 2, 2015
21.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BN7wEaljeZF/
22.
https://twitter.com/Fred_Delicious/status/946471245792645122
23.
https://twitter.com/carinahsieh/status/920485327646744576