15 Simple And Ridiculously Clever Last-Minute Halloween Costumes

If you’re like me, you love Halloween, but the 31st will inevitably sneak up on you once again. You’ll get that Facebook invite to a fun party, click yes, and not give it another thought until a few days before when someone asks you: “So, what are you dressing up as this year?”

Not to worry. Here I’ve provided you with several options for costumes you can put together with items laying around your house, or even with one quick trip to Goodwill. No one will have any idea you haphazardly slapped it together the day of. In fact, they’ll even remark on how clever you are for coming up with such a simple but brilliant costume. Go ahead and take all the credit. You’re welcome.

15. Batman

Xtian flexing his broken-umbrealla batwing. Awesome, btw.

What you’ll need:

  • a cheap black umbrella
  • a black hoodie or long sleeve
  • tape

Have an old broken umbrella laying around? Of course you do! Umbrellas are about as durable as single-ply toilet paper. Cut that bad boy into two pieces and tape it to a hoodie. Now you’re ready to take to the night sky.

14. Wednesday Addams

wednesday addams cosplay

What you’ll need:

  • white collared shirt
  • a black dress or sweater/skirt combo
  • brunette hair or black wig put into braids

The goth look is timeless, and possibly one of the most recognizable goths of all time is Wednesday Addams. This look is easy enough to pull off but the attitude is what makes it.

13. Lumberjack/Brawny Man

What you’ll need:

  • a beard or at least a few days of stubble
  • beanie
  • red flannel
  • an ax (preferably plastic) or a roll of Brawny paper towels

Depending on wether or not you can grow a beard, this costume is easy and cheap to put together. Even if you’re on the more follicly challenged side of the spectrum, you can get one of these fun beard substitutes on Amazon.

12. Ladybug

File:Fan Expo Canada 2016 Ladybug IMG 0114.jpg

What you’ll need:

  • as many red articles of clothing you can get
  • black fabric or paper to cut into circles
  • tape or glue

Maybe one of the easiest last-minute costumes to pull off. Bonus points if you can get your hands on some antennae and a mask. Also, anyone who’s seen A Bug’s Life knows this costume can work for both women and men.

11. Bouncer

File:ZacharyCoffin-Bouncer.jpg

What you’ll need:

  • Black shirt
  • clipboard
  • a rope
  • be a dick

Send some time hanging out by the door at the party. You’d be surprised how many people will hand you their I.D. without even thinking about it.

10. A Ceiling Fan

Look! A Ceiling Fan!

What you’ll need:

  • a jacket or shirt
  • a hat
  • tape
  • a Sharpie

This can be as creative as you want. All you really need is a white shirt that says “GO CEILING” on it to make the joke work, but you might want to go the extra mile if you don’t want to spend the whole night explaining your costume.

9. Nudist On Strike

Nudist on Strike

What you’ll need:

  • A sign that says “NUDIST ON STRIKE”

Look, I’m not saying it’s the greatest costume ever, but it’ll get a chuckle out of a few people and you can literally put this together on the way to the party. You don’t owe them anything.

8. Fantasy Football

Halloween ’13 Megathread 1: What are your best costume ideas? from AskReddit

What you’ll need:

  • a robe or Snuggie
  • a beard, wizard cap, or football helmet
  • a staff
  • a football

There are plenty of variations on this costume that’ll work. Really, any type of fantasy character holding a football will get the job done.

7. Super Mario and/or Luigi

File:Otakuthon 2014- Mario Bros. (15029365982).jpg

What you’ll need:

  • Overalls (or blue jeans with suspenders)
  • a red or green shirt and hat
  • fake mustache

A great couples costume as well. If you don’t want to cough up the money for some overalls you’ll never were again, some $5 suspenders will work in a pinch. I did this last year and got my entire costume at Goodwill for $20.

6. Rosie the Riveter

Hell yeah! Thanks to @evajannotta for sharing her Rosie the Riveter costume and rocking her organic #tradlands button-up. You're awesome, Eva! #howsheworeit

What you’ll need:

  • blue jeans
  • blue collared shirt
  • red bandana
  • iconic pose

You’ve probably seen this one every year, but don’t let that stop you. The future is female and Rosie has never been more in style. Just don’t wander into and Crypt neighborhoods.

5. The Bachelor/Bachelorette

woman in white sweater and black pants with bouquet of red roses

What you’ll need:

  • Nice suit or dress
  • several roses

An easily executed costume that allows you to look nice and if you’re single, can be an awesome icebreaker when talking to anyone you’re into. Distribute those roses then sit back and wait for love.

4. Bob Ross

Very happy little trees

What you’ll need:

  • brown afro wig
  • a beard (face paint will work)
  • a collared button-up shirt (blue or white)
  • a painters pallet (cardboard cutout will work)
  • a paintbrush
  • a calm and soothing demeanor

Another easy costume that can also be a couples package. Either a happy little tree or a landscape painting. Netflix just added a ton of episodes if you’re looking for inspiration.

3. Cereal Killer

Cereal Killer

What you’ll need:

  • assorted sizes and brands of cereal
  • fake blood or red paint
  • a white shirt
  • some plastic knives

Tis one is a little on the darker side, but I feel like the cleverness trumps the gore. Plus you get to eat a ton of cereal to prep the costume.

2. One Night Stand

What you’ll need:

  • a medium or large cardboard box
  • assorted nightstand accessories (alarm clock, picture frame, cup…)
  • lampshade for a hat

This one is great, but I’d recommend actually writing “one night stand” somewhere on the costume. Again, you don’t want to spend the entire party explaining what you are.

1. French Kiss

What you’ll need:

  • face paint
  • striped shirts
  • baguettes
  • berets
  • scarves or handkerchiefs
  • wine glass
  • friends

Magnifique! French Kiss will crush at any Halloween party. Unless you get separated from your group and end up looking like a crappy mime.

Mike

Mike Primavera

Mike Primavera is a Chicago-based comedy writer even though he doesn't HAVE to work. He lives comfortably off of his family's pasta fortune. Follow him on all social media at @primawesome