PizzaBottle
Forget Fahrenheit 451. Forget Romeo and Juliet. Every child in every school should read these insane Twitter stories instead. Just imagine the book reports, the 500-word essays, and journal entries. These are some of the most dramatic and hilarious stories ever to be recorded on Twitter, and they’ll stick in your head all day long. Also, if you haven’t caught up with this canon list, drop everything and rectify that now.
1.
https://twitter.com/komalammm/status/955235231795212289
2.
https://twitter.com/tarynland/status/934564247891333121
3.
So my brother texts me and says “guess what I done today” and proceeds to tell me he surprised his wife with 2 alpacas… and yes they’re riding in his minivan. Meet Rebel and Shenanigan. I can’t make this stuff up y’all. pic.twitter.com/vu2vlb6vyC
— ｋａｃｉｅ (@KacieMalyn) January 3, 2018
4.
https://twitter.com/ksuth96/status/950848314014085121
5.
This lady at my work today told me her ex husband cheated on her so she made him a “beef and rice” dinner with alpo dog food mixed in and didn’t tell him till after he ate the whole thing that if he wanted to act like a dog she would feed him like one & I’m still laughing
— •emma• (@emma_s_cole) March 23, 2018
6.
today in class this guy I was sitting next to had a bag of carrots & the entire class he kept throwing them into his backpack. I asked him what he was doing & he was like "oh sorry do u want one? they're for Kent" and then just whips open his backpack to show his chinchilla Kent
— char (@hollyjolleychar) December 4, 2017
7.
https://twitter.com/AdamBroud/status/973025457388929024
8.
https://twitter.com/RickyCoronaa/status/946948099963891713
9.
Today the drug dog came to our school and he stopped by my car and wouldn't move so I had to go out there and unlock it so he could search my car and it was because of the dog treats I keep in there
— shammy (@sammy_gwin) March 22, 2018
10.
https://twitter.com/Flaminhaystack/status/953299644636950528
h/t: Buzzfeed