We’ve come a long way towards gender equality, especially within the last couple of years, but there is still much to be done.
Women in the workplace are still losing $513 billion in wages compared to their male peers as a result of the wage gap. Women are still expected to be financially independent and to have careers while juggling housekeeping, childrearing, and getting dinner on the table. They’re forced to juggle because choosing one over the other comes with its own set of issues. Women are still discounted at every turn when it comes to sexual assault or harassment.
The list goes on and on and on.
Ending with bras. BRAS. When will some genius woman scientist come up with a way to keep ta-tas perky forever so that bras become a thing of the past? I’m waiting.
1.
2019 will be the year I finally vanquish* my enemies**
*wash
**bras— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) December 31, 2018
2.
Took off my bra and forgot what I was mad about
— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) September 18, 2017
3.
Me: “Whose bra is that?”
Daughter: “Mine.”
Me: “Why is it on the kitchen windowsill?”
Daughter: “I took it off to eat.”— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) December 30, 2018
4.
I’m going to start a fashion app that allows you to filter instantly for “you can wear a normal bra with this dress” and it will make millions.
— Nicole Cliffe (@Nicole_Cliffe) December 31, 2018
5.
Every woman who has ever taken off a sports bra is a professional escape artist.
— Kate Sidley (@sidleykate) February 14, 2016
6.
I bet dying feels like taking off your bra but better.
— Charlene deGuzman (@charstarlene) December 12, 2011
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— Ruin My Week (@RuinedWeek) January 11, 2019
7.
ALL MY NON-BRA-WEARING FRIENDS LOOK AWAY
(whispers) ok whoever's left, is there a technical term for when you have a Bra Incident and you end up with either smashboob or fourboob and you can't fix it right away
is the word i'm looking for calamatitty
— Premee (@premeesaurus) May 30, 2018
8.
how in this modern age of technological wonders is our strategy with sports bra design still to just lock the titties up in smash jail
— Sweatpants Cher ⚫️ (@House_Feminist) November 30, 2018
9.
I don't carry a wallet & I often put money inside my bra.
At night when I undress, I pretend my boobs are paying me a ransom to be set free.— Carbosly (@Carbosly) August 6, 2015
10.
If the feeling you get when you take off your bra after wearing it for 24 hours could be bottled, it would be the most addictive drug ever.
— Sam H. Escobar (@myhairisblue) September 14, 2014
11.
I thought I was depressed but then it turned out I just needed to take my bra off
— Emily Heller (@MrEmilyHeller) October 19, 2013
12.
Just slung my bra off & threw it to the other side of the couch where there are already 2 other bras. If my math is right, it's Wednesday.
— bubble girl (@JessObsess) June 6, 2013
13.
That thing where you covertly put your hands in your bra and scoop your titties up in public.
— Emily McCombs (@msemilymccombs) August 16, 2013
14.
[first date]
Him: Tell me about yourself
Me: WELL, i didn’t wear a bra with my dress today so all my boob sweat dripped onto my feet— grace spelman (@GraceSpelman) June 10, 2016
15.
Ugh there has to be a better way to protest the patriarchy than burning bras. Bras cost like $60 and I need them to walk down stairs
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) April 28, 2018
16.
[At Doctor]
Me:I'm having chest pain
Doc:Did you buy a new bra?
Me:Yes! Thanks for noticing!
Doc:I meant it could be causing the pain
Me:Oh— Princess Buttercup (@GoldenSpirals) January 26, 2015
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— Ruin My Week (@RuinedWeek) January 10, 2019
17.
"How many tags should we sew into these? Like, enough to print the Iliad? That sounds good." – Bra designers
— Alison Leiby (@AlisonLeiby) August 25, 2015
18.
Boy, are you like a strapless bra? Because you give me no support and make me uncomfortable but I need you to complete a wedding outfit.
— Aisling Gheal (@Aisling_Gheal) February 19, 2017
19.
Just told my sister not to die in my shower because the cops would show up and then I'd have to put a bra on.
— Jenny Johnson (@JennyJohnsonHi5) July 25, 2016
20.
Push me aside, but I will come back. Hide me, but I will always emerge.
I AM POWER.
I AM RESILIENCE.
I AM A BRA STRAP.— Mara “Get Rid of the Nazis” Wilson (@MaraWilson) September 11, 2014
h/t BuzzFeed