Mike
You don’t think about it often, but most of the things we take for granted today probably had very dubious beginnings. I mean sure, lots of people ride horses. They have been for thousands of years…but who was the first person to say “I’m gonna try to climb on one of those things and go fast.” They probably looked insane. Anyway, here are some other of those times.
1.
So, who was the first person to see an egg come out of a chicken's ass and say, "I'm gonna eat that."
— Not Will Ferrell (@itsWillyFerrell) April 7, 2014
2.
First woman that gave birth to twins was prolly like “????????”
— ι aм noт ĸayтranada (@BarkyBoogz) July 25, 2018
3.
The first person to ever masturbate must've been like YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
— . (@ForeverRob97) October 14, 2014
4.
can you imagine being the first person to try caviar. just tear open a fish and eat whatever the fuck freaky beads fall out of it
— matt lubchansky (@Lubchansky) April 20, 2015
5.
who was the first persom to eat a potoato. who looked at it adn thougt "im gona eat this weird rock"
— jonny sun (@jonnysun) September 8, 2014
6.
I wonder who the first person was to look at a beehive and think, "those bastards are hiding something delicious in there, I know it!" 🤔
— mtlife101 (@mtlife101) July 3, 2016
7.
The first guy to discover milk probably did a lot of other weird shit
— Steve Stifler (@StevStiffler) July 18, 2018
8.
The first person to taste 'chocolate' must have been very trusting
— Roisin Conaty (@Roisinconaty) July 31, 2014
9.
The first person to make popcorn must have been seriously freaking out.
— Shower Thoughts (@TheWeirdWorld) December 18, 2015
10.
The first person to ever eat a lobster must've been pretty hungry.
— Aaron Pauley (@aaronpauley) October 27, 2016
11.
The first person to discover that parrots can talk must have been pretty freaked out
— Bill Murray (@BiIIMurray) February 1, 2014
12.
The first person to walk into the battlefield with a full suit of armour must have scared the sh*t out of their enemies.
— Shower Thoughts (@TheWeirdWorld) May 28, 2018
13.
the first person to use a paper towel as a lil temporary plate big snapped
— coldwaterchris (@yunglame) July 23, 2018
14.
the first person to use “i know what you are but what am i” must’ve sent the other person to the shadow realm
— tj (@terrencelevell) July 23, 2018
15.
I wonder who the first person was to go “Oh hey, tobacco I’m gonna roll that shit up and smoke it”
— Josh Pieters (@joshua_pieters) March 28, 2018
16.
The first person to see a sunset was probably like well this ain't good.
— captain glasses (@online_shawn) August 2, 2014
17.
I’ve always been curious what the first person to try eating maple syrup was thinking 🤔 #AirportThoughts
— Joe Callahan (@JoeCallahan4) January 29, 2018
18.
Who was the first person to walk fast in New York
— harmony 2.2 (@harmonysaccount) July 31, 2018
19.
Yo who was the first dude to put something in his mouth and swallow it. The inventor of eating mustve been whack.
— Tony Mango Fanta (@SkintiteJ) August 1, 2018
20.
21.
Who was the first person to realize the tiny difference in alligators and crocodiles? Who got close enough and was like “Ayye blood, these slick different”?
— Afro-disiac (@tevindavis20) July 26, 2018
h/t BuzzFeed