Can you change a tire? Sew a button? Lasso a feral hog? Chances are you can do some of these things but not all. The fact of the matter is that, no matter how competent we feel, all of us go through life with glaring blind spots and gaps in our knowledge of basic adult skills. After all, that afternoon you spent learning how to change a tire was an afternoon you didn’t spend learning how to bake a cake.
A Twitter user named Jenée recently came to the realization that not only are “adult life skill” knowledge gaps common, they’re also interesting.
Yesterday we learned that our landlord (a Stanford-educated engineer) doesn't know how to open a combination lock. And Joel admitted he can't blow up balloons. So now I'm obsessed with knowing what everyone's weird life skill blind spots are.
— Jenée (@jdesmondharris) August 4, 2019
Everyone’s blind spots are different and it’s honestly fascinating to compare our many glaring weaknesses. So let the comparisons commence!
1. Some are charming, some are weird, and some are pretty inexcusable. Like this Ivy-Leaguer who can’t use a mailbox
My ex went to Yale and did not know how to use a residential mailbox when we met.
— ghost mom (@radtoria) August 5, 2019
2. And this other Ivy-Leaguer who can’t read a thermostat
I dated a guy who went to Princeton and was baffled by the thermostat, and well, basically every simple life task.
— Big Rita (@IAmBirgitta) August 5, 2019
3. This bad “big whistler” is excused (that sh*t is hard)
I can't do that big whistle. You know the one, with the fingers in the mouth? pic.twitter.com/aUhidVTC5Z
— Spanish Inquisition Truther (@Nevidge20) August 5, 2019
4. This person who can’t do a normal whistle is not (that sh*t is easy)
I still cannot for the life of me, whistle.
I’ve tried everything.
— Abimbola (@_AbimbolaOshodi) August 6, 2019
5. This escalator wimp
I can’t get on or off of an escalator with confidence. I desperately cling to the rail. And my husband looks at me like pic.twitter.com/IQ4LPcP0A2
— Nicole Kohr (@cystic4real) August 6, 2019
6. This casino drop-out
I can't shuffle. I love playing card games and my mom is amazing at shuffling. I've tried to learn. She's tried to teach me. I can't do it.
— Lilo the Autistic Queer (@A_Silent_Child) August 5, 2019
7. This struggling chef
Can’t crack an egg without shell going in it. Drives me mad
— Lauren (@coffeeatsunrise) August 5, 2019
8. This guy who will never make it in the music biz
I can’t make the fart noise with my arm pit
— Juan Nevarez (@JuanitoKidd) August 5, 2019
9. This dustbuster
After 10 minutes struggle I couldn’t turn on the vacuum cleaner, my new roommate questioned my PhD in Physics.
— Dr. HYDRO (@hydro101hydro) August 6, 2019
10. This bad Canadian
I can’t ski or ice skate – normally not a big deal, but I’m Canadian so it’s like sacrilegious.
— Allison McDonald (@NoFlashCards) August 5, 2019
11. This hapless home-improver
When I'm undoing a screw or something. In my head I'm singing "righty tighty, lefty loosy"
(For context, I'm a Medical doctor)Also, there's a hiss Nigerians do what trying to hail a bike or can. I can't do it.
— Friendly Neighborhood Doctor (@Okizle) August 6, 2019
12. This telephone phobic
I’m terrified of speaking on the phone, never call anyone, and often as not dodge calls from my loved ones. I basically got married so I wouldn’t have to order food over the phone.
— Katherine Howe (@katherinebhowe) August 5, 2019
13. This meat confuser (It’s CHICKEN, SUSANNAH!)
I can’t tell the difference between most meats (raised vegetarian, but eat it occasionally as an adult.) Don’t even ask me how to cook them.
— Susannah Birch (@SusannahBirch) August 6, 2019
14. This left-right conundrum that might be a medical condition
It takes up to 3 seconds to know which way is left or right. Sometimes, I have to mentally point the direction to get it.
— N7 (@Daksurr) August 6, 2019
15. Yeah you might wanna get this checked out
I can only snap my fingers on my left hand. And to tell my left from my right I have to snap my fingers Everytime.
— Chow Meow (@Cuntosaur) August 6, 2019
16. This wide-of-the-mark receiver
I can't catch things.
— Jeff (@kmlkmljkl) August 6, 2019
17. This silent snapper
I can’t click my fingers. Doesn’t make any sound at all. I’m 37 years old.
— Rae Johnston (@raejohnston) August 5, 2019
18. This frustrated consumer
I can't open packaging – bags of chips, anything wrapped in plastic, etc. I simply can't open unless I use scissors or a knife. pic.twitter.com/2xhzPBmyy4
— Jennifer Jones Newbill (she/her/hers) ✨ (@JenNewbill) August 6, 2019
19. This fruitless orange-eater
3 master’s degrees and I can’t peel an orange.
— Mike Letizia (@mjletizia) August 6, 2019
20. This painfully relatable one
Intimacy.
— BJ (@azzabazazz) August 5, 2019