So, I’ve Been Breaking Up With Random People Over Text Message Again (15 Pics)

I’m not totally sure why I started doing this. I just know that one night I was with some friends at a bar, and I decided to text a random number: “I don’t think this is working out. I’m breaking up with you.” A few seconds later I got a response, and I was hooked.

I’ve sent out thousands of breakup texts. This is because most people I text don’t respond. 80% of people who do respond don’t give me anything usable. But inside that 20% are the people who make it all worthwhile.

I love doing this because it’s essentially spontaneous improv with a stranger. I’m sure I could make these up on my own but they would never be as funny. I need that person on the other end who is either incredulous, angry, or in my favorite cases, actually plays along.

These are the best of what I have so far, but I’m working on another batch as well. I hope you guys like them because I’m probably not going to stop anytime soon. I do this more for my entertainment than anything else.












Mike Primavera

Mike Primavera is a Chicago-based comedy writer even though he doesn't HAVE to work. He lives comfortably off of his family's pasta fortune. Follow him on all social media at @primawesome