A Lot Of Things Didn’t Happen This Week, But These Didn’t Happen The Most (15 Pics)

When I was little I used to tell the other kids my dad wasn’t around because he was a spy, even though really he just liked cocaine more than being a dad. I rolled with that story until around 6th grade. Do you know what happened then? I grew up and stopped telling weird stories that were obvious lies. Do you know who didn’t? These dingleberries.

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Mike

Mike Primavera

Mike Primavera is a Chicago-based comedy writer even though he doesn't HAVE to work. He lives comfortably off of his family's pasta fortune. Follow him on all social media at @primawesome