Toilets Like These Are Why I Don’t Travel (21 Pics)

I love to poop. When doing so, I prefer to do it in the least stressful environment possible. Ideally my own home. This is why cursed toilets, or “road toilets” as I call them, can make or break any trip for me. You really have no idea what other folks consider a restroom.

Yes, non “western” style toilets have a learning curve, and I don’t deny that pooping in a crouched position is highly efficient and will clear most log jams. If it is clean we can figure it out. It’s the so-called “normal” toilets I’ve come across in America that scare me the most. One of these toilets has teeth. TEETH.

Some advice:

  • When traveling always carry wet wipes or a small pack of napkins. Some places don’t use TP and you don’t want to waste a shirt.
  • When using a crouch toilet, if you do not have the proper core or quad strength, you are going to mess yourself, or at least fall down. I recommend taking off your pants and using the wall as support.
  • I cannot stress this next one enough. If you are at a place and go to use the bathroom, and that bathroom has a toilet with teeth, run. Never look back.

1. I’m all for saving time but this is ridiculous.

2. I’m gonna head this warning cone.

3. WHAT DID I TELL YOU???

4. When you’re done pooping you just slide down to the floor.

5. I’m gonna go with “no”

6. I had a dream like this once.

7. I’ll hold it.

8. Not how I plan to die. I’ll pass.

9. If you poo, Disney will sue.

10. You can’t miss.

11. Nothing wrong here, just imagine having to poop really bad and then finding this in the bathroom.

12. Just imagine the spiders in there.

13. RIP, my butt.

14. Best of luck.

15. Why though?

16. Not only will I not use it, but I’m also terrified to look in that hole.

17. A one-way mirror public toilet. Who is this for?

18. Ok, this is pretty good.

19. Not this though.

20. What is this, a toilet for ants?

21. Toot toot.

Mike

Mike Primavera

Mike Primavera is a Chicago-based comedy writer even though he doesn't HAVE to work. He lives comfortably off of his family's pasta fortune. Follow him on all social media at @primawesome