People Are Sharing Clever Ways To Insult Someone (20 Pics)

I’m a big believer in being nice, but sometimes people are so dumb it’s like they don’t even know it. Some euphemisms for stupid are kind of harsh but others are so eloquent and funny that if the person you’re talking about is around to hear, they’ll likely not even know what you’re talking about.

I’ve met a lot of stupid people in my day, but when it’s not someone you know, you can’t just go around insulting people. You have to be polite about it. If you need a nice euphemism for stupid, these people will spark some inspiration for you. You can keep these in your back pocket for the next time you get stuck talking to some idiot in line at the store.

It’s not what you say, but how you say it.

1. “Sharp as a marble, that one.

randolotapus, James Samsonow

2. “I would agree with you but then we would both be wrong

captainawesome1983, ResoluteSupportMedia

3. “It’s impossible to underestimate you

Snugl-v301, MACBA Museu d’Art Contemporani de Barcelona

4. “They only got two brain cells and both of them are fighting for third place.”

NostalgicPotat0, Ivannah Doobie

5. “Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.”

dusty-kat, supafly

6. “You could hide your own Easter eggs.

bdiz78, Eden, Janine and Jim

7. “My teacher said I was as ‘quick as a glacier’…

Hairydoggie, Gareth Sloan

8. “You aren’t the biggest idiot in the world but you better hope they don’t die.”

soalindie, Slimane Lalami

9. “He’s so far behind he thinks he’s first.

perstn, The U.S. Army

10. “In Greece, we say ‘when it was raining brains, you had an umbrella'”

GSavvage, Charles Edward Miller

11. “His train of thought is still boarding at the station.”

Washjockey, elminium

12. “You’re the reason we have warning labels.

igenus44, Paul Fisher

13. “The wheels spinning, but the hamsters dead.

lburton273, frankieleon

14. “At this point, you can only impress me.”

Roman_Suicide_Note, Aaron

15. “A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.”

BerenTheBold, Hans Splinter

16. “Useful as a chocolate teapot.

dd28064212, DvYang

17. “Ahh Terry, having you around is like losing three good men.”

StrykerSeven, Bernard Spragg. NZ

18.  “I’m guessing you weren’t burdened with an overabundance of schooling.”

FlipSchitz, Krishna Avanti School

19. “One of my all-time favorites is ‘More foam than beer.’

DoctorSalty, Bernt Rostad

20. “Once heard someone say ‘Well he’s about as sharp as a sock full of soup.'”

angrypunishment, Tony Alter



Nate Armbruster

Nate Armbruster is a stand-up comedian and writer based in Chicago who is likely writing a joke as you read this. Find him online at