Mike
S**t happens. Like, a lot.
So chances are it’ll be your turn to take the brunt of it at some point. That’s why it’s important to enjoy the times when it’s happening to someone else.
Funny fails are only hilarious with a little perspective…
1. I got stuck behind a draw bridge today, and so did an ambulance.
2. Let’s talk outside.
3. “We sterilize every flight” but apparently do not remove human hair from a cup holder do we JetBlue?
4. Cars after freezing rain in Vladivostok, Russia
5. Whole Foods Prime delivery for my mom’s birthday.
6. Get all the way to work, look down and this is what I see. I work 1.5 hours from home, so I can’t go home and change.
7. Amazon sent me a used Beats headphone that someone swapped and returned.
8. I lit a match to light a candle on the toilet. Flew out of my hand and landed in my underwear while burning. I simultaneously knocked the candle off the counter in a panic and it shattered all over the floor while my underwear caught fire.
9. The first day on vacation and our half of the hotel hasn’t had power. Guess who might be going home early?
10. Making brownies didn’t go as planned.
11. Was getting ready for my concert when my bow exploded.
12. The nastiest passenger award goes to this guy. His child also proceeded to run up and down the aisle screaming. Fun times.
13. I’ve got a feeling Bob has some regrets today.
14. Went hiking for my partner’s birthday. There were bugs.
15. Brewed my morning coffee with my mug upside down.
16. My sister toasted bread with jelly in my brand new toaster. She’s 31.
17. Found out today that I developed an allergy to raspberries, my favorite fruit 🙁
18. It’s been on my finger for 22 years. Come home from a walk around the block to find the main diamond gone.
19. My girlfriend found a slug in her salad after she ate the whole thing.
20. My biggest fear.
21. Someone didn’t get their mail today.
22. Been away from home (Texas) for almost 2 years & couldn’t wait to eat a Whataburger. The power is out.
23.
