Nate
I love jokes, and one of my favorite types of jokes is one-liners. A simple set-up/punchline can make you laugh just as hard as a long-form joke.
One of the first stand-up comedians I ever listen to was Mitch Hedberg, and many people consider him one of the best one-liner comedians to ever do it.
You can find jokes like this all over the internet. A popular type of one-liner has a “what’s the difference between” set-up.
Here are some of the funniest “what’s the difference between” jokes found on the internet:
1.
Q: What’s the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?
A: A northern fairytale begins, “Once upon a time…”. A southern fairytale begins, “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this…”
2.
Q: What’s the difference between the mafia and the government?
A: One of them is organized.
3.
Q: What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?
A: I don’t know and I don’t care.
4.
Q: What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
A: One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
5.
Q: What’s the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?
A: An amateur thief says, “Give me all your money!”. A professional thief says, “Sign here please.”
6.
Q: What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo & Juliet?
A: One’s a Coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.
7.
Q: What’s the difference between ice cream and your advice?
A: I asked for the ice cream.
8.
Q: What’s the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man?
A: Iron Man stops the bad guy, Aluminum Man foils their plans.
9.
Q: What’s the difference between communism and a pencil?
A: The pencil works on things other than paper.
10.
Q: What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
A: Attire.
11.
Q: What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
A: One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.
12.
Q: What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?
A: The letter F.
13.
Q: What’s the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?
A: Their seasoning.
14.
Q: What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?
A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer.
15.
Q: What’s the difference between love and marriage?
A: Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener.
16.
Q: What’s the difference between democracy and feudalism?
A: With feudalism, it’s your count that votes.
17.
Q: What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?
A: The people in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones but the people in Abu Dhabi doooooo.
18.
Q: What’s the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?
A: A porcupine has pricks on the outside.
19.
Q: What’s the difference between mitosis and escaping prison?
A: Nothing; they both require splitting from cells.
20.
Q: What is the difference between an atheistic shop and a religious shop?
A: An atheistic shop is non-prophet.
21.
Q: What’s the difference between an envelope and a window?
A: Nobody looks at you funny when you lick an envelope.
22.
Q: What’s the difference between a musician and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.
23.
Q: What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?
A: February 14th.
24.
Q: What is the difference between a kleptomaniac and an actor?
A: A kleptomaniac takes things literally.
25.
Q: What’s the difference between a good night and a great night?
A: How you tell the story the next morning.
26.
Q: What’s the difference between the winner of a bodybuilding competition and a couch potato?
A: One has a trophy for muscles and the other has muscle atrophy.
27.
Q: What’s the difference between a bowl of moldy lettuce and a depressing song?
A: One is a bad salad, and the other is a sad ballad.
28.
Q: What is the difference between standing in the rain and standing in the shower?
A: The water bill.
29.
Q: What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
A: You’ll see one later and one in a while.
30.
Q: What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?
A: You’ll see one later and one in a while.
h/t: BoredPanda