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30 Funny “What’s The Difference Between” Jokes Found On The Internet

I love jokes, and one of my favorite types of jokes is one-liners. A simple set-up/punchline can make you laugh just as hard as a long-form joke.

One of the first stand-up comedians I ever listen to was Mitch Hedberg, and many people consider him one of the best one-liner comedians to ever do it.

You can find jokes like this all over the internet. A popular type of one-liner has a “what’s the difference between” set-up.

Here are some of the funniest “what’s the difference between” jokes found on the internet:


1.

Q: What’s the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale?

A: A northern fairytale begins, “Once upon a time…”. A southern fairytale begins, “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this…”

2.

Q: What’s the difference between the mafia and the government?

A: One of them is organized.

3.

Q: What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy?

A: I don’t know and I don’t care.

4.

Q: What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?

A: One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

5.

Q: What’s the difference between an amateur thief and a professional thief?

A: An amateur thief says, “Give me all your money!”. A professional thief says, “Sign here please.”

6.

Q: What’s the difference between COVID-19 and Romeo & Juliet?

A: One’s a Coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis.

7.

Q: What’s the difference between ice cream and your advice?

A: I asked for the ice cream.

8.

Q: What’s the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man?

A: Iron Man stops the bad guy, Aluminum Man foils their plans.

9.

Q: What’s the difference between communism and a pencil?

A: The pencil works on things other than paper.

10.

Q: What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?

A: Attire.

11.

Q: What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

A: One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

12.

Q: What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?

A: The letter F.

13.

Q: What’s the difference between spring rolls and summer rolls?

A: Their seasoning.

14.

Q: What’s the difference between England’s football team and a tea bag?

A: The tea bag stays in the cup longer.

15.

Q: What’s the difference between love and marriage?

A: Love is blind and marriage is an eye-opener.

16.

Q: What’s the difference between democracy and feudalism?

A: With feudalism, it’s your count that votes.

17.

Q: What’s the difference between Dubai and Abu Dhabi?

A: The people in Dubai don’t like the Flintstones but the people in Abu Dhabi doooooo.

18.

Q: What’s the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

A: A porcupine has pricks on the outside.

19.

Q: What’s the difference between mitosis and escaping prison?

A: Nothing; they both require splitting from cells.

20.

Q: What is the difference between an atheistic shop and a religious shop?

A: An atheistic shop is non-prophet.

21.

Q: What’s the difference between an envelope and a window?

A: Nobody looks at you funny when you lick an envelope.

22.

Q: What’s the difference between a musician and a large pizza?

A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.

23.

Q: What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?

A: February 14th.

24.

Q: What is the difference between a kleptomaniac and an actor?

A: A kleptomaniac takes things literally.

25.

Q: What’s the difference between a good night and a great night?

A: How you tell the story the next morning.

26.

Q: What’s the difference between the winner of a bodybuilding competition and a couch potato?

A: One has a trophy for muscles and the other has muscle atrophy.

27.

Q: What’s the difference between a bowl of moldy lettuce and a depressing song?

A: One is a bad salad, and the other is a sad ballad.

28.

Q: What is the difference between standing in the rain and standing in the shower?

A: The water bill.

29.

Q: What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?

A: You’ll see one later and one in a while.

30.

Q: What’s the difference between an alligator and a crocodile?

A: You’ll see one later and one in a while.

 

h/t: BoredPanda