In the vast realm of the internet, few platforms captivate and ignite discussions quite like Reddit. With its myriad of communities and endless threads, Reddit has become a virtual melting pot where people from all walks of life come together to share their stories, opinions, and experiences. Each week, the platform churns out a collection of narratives that manage to polarize the online world, leaving the internet divided and buzzing with fervor.
In this post, we delve into the depths of Reddit to uncover the most controversial stories that have captured the attention of netizens and sparked heated debates throughout the week. Here are 16 of the best ones we saw.
I (16F) am an only child and that position will be expiring in October when my parents have their second child. They were always supposed to be one and done with me, something I was aware of was partly due to them finding childcare ridiculously expensive and [my] mom enjoying her job too much to stay home. I think another part of it [is] they are not very natural parents and are pretty much entirely hands off. We never do anything as a family and they are not very involved in my life. They pay for stuff and that is their contribution to my life.
The pregnancy was a big shock for them, and for me. I heard them discussing WTF they would do, and my mom was repeatedly saying she was not going to stay at home and she was not going to take much maternity leave. That she wants to be back at work ASAP. They complained about how much it will cost to get someone to watch the baby while they work and during the summers and stuff. I heard them mention me and I was like oh hell no.
They sat me down a week ago and told me they had these plans for me to watch the baby for three to four hours after school until they get home from work. It would involve quitting all my after-school stuff and not hanging out with friends after school either. They also want me to stay home next summer and to consider hanging around to be there for the next few summers. I was like no way. They told me I am going to be a big sister now and that as part of the family I have responsibilities. I told them THEY had responsibilities as parents and I am not a parent, I am the child in their house. They told me not for long. I said I could just rush to graduation and leave so they can’t use me as free childcare.
I don’t think they expected these reactions from me or the thought I had put into it. After I heard them talk with each other I found out I could graduate in December by talking to my guidance counselor. I’m almost finished [with] my junior year now and could finish senior year early with the grades I keep and the work I do. That is definitely the most appealing option to me and I’ll be 17 in a couple of weeks anyway.
My parents were really unhappy with me and they told me I am going to miss out on so much by doing this. I told them I won’t take care of or raise the baby for them. That I have my own life and being stuck with a baby is not part of it. They told me I am being incredibly selfish and to think about what I am throwing away. They also said I won’t be a very good sister if I refuse to be part of the baby’s life.
AITA? – u/Zestyclose-Middle-41
So I (45M) have a son… (15) with my ex-wife… We had an amicable divorce when [my son] was 2, and so far we’ve been coparenting quite well.
Now, I could say a lot of things about [my ex-wife’s] parenting, but the long and short of it is that she and her new husband cater their parenting style to their two younger kids together (11F and 8M). Because of this, he’s decreased his time at their house ever since he got the choice, and now spends every other weekend at their house.
Around a month ago, [my ex-wife] and her husband made a “reading rule” for the kids. The 8-year-old has to read 30 minutes a day; the 11-year-old has to read for an hour, and [my son] has to read for two hours. I have no idea why they did this; I think it’s because the 8-year-old is falling behind in his reading level and they wanted to keep things “fair” between the kids. I think that this is ridiculous, as [my son] is a very smart kid already, and he needs that time for homework and relaxing since he doesn’t have that much free time to begin with.
[My ex-wife] let me know that she expected me to enforce the “reading rule” when [my son] is at my house. I told her that I would not. She said that it was unfair to [my son’s] half-siblings that he could just leave for my house and not have to follow the rule, while they had to follow the rule no matter what. I told her tough luck, it’s my house and I make the rules, not her.
Well now, [my son] is thinking about not staying with her at all anymore due to the increasing strictness of her and her husband’s rules. She told me that it’s all my fault that he doesn’t want to be around her anymore because I was so lax with the rules. I’m pretty sure I’m in the right here, but I though it might be a good idea to get some perspective, so AITA? – u/CapableCutlery
I (52M) was with my wife (53F) since high school. We got married and had a son (25M) and daughter (27F). My son came out as gay when he was 16. My wife was never supportive of my son being gay. He moved out at 19 to live with his boyfriend. My wife tried to pretend he did not exist. None of her family were supportive and would let it be known during family events. As a result, I became distant from my wife and was looking into divorce.
She got diagnosed with breast cancer last year and I put the divorce on hold to help take care of her. [My] son also helped, but she would push him away. The cancer spread throughout her body and she passed away last week. We had the service last week and her family made it clear that [my] son and his boyfriend had to sit away from everyone. Her brother approached me asking if I would sit with him and his family. I simply told him no and went to sit with my son.
Everyone gave us dirty glares and it was worse during the reception. Her brother approached me after the service, angry that I chose my son over my wife. He even went as far as to say that my wife did not want her son there as he was a disgrace. I am now disgraced by her family for supporting my son. This has caused tension between the families. I just would like to know if I was the AH? – u/Conscious_Jury_7937
So my (F16) name is Andi – just Andi. My mom’s dad passed away just a few days before she found out she was pregnant. My mom was very close with her dad and his name was Andrew (also went by Andy). The technical female version of Andrew is Andrea, but neither my mom nor dad liked the name, but my mom wanted to honor her dad in some way, so I got named Andi. I love my name; I think it fits me.
My parents got divorced when I was 8 and I live with my mom most of the time but visit my dad every other weekend (as well as holidays). Three years ago my dad started dating his now-fiancée “Kate.” Kate for some reason when we met assumed my name was Andrea. I explained to her it was just Andi. She kept calling me Andrea though. I ended up telling my mom about it and she told me just to ignore Kate until she calls me Andi.
Well, this past weekend I was at my dad’s and we were visiting some of Kate’s family. Well, she kept calling over for Andrea, and of course, I ignored her. She got mad and said why am I ignoring her, and I said because that’s not my name and you know this. Her dad and brother basically laughed saying they thought I just went by Andi as a nickname and I said no it’s just Andi. They then asked Kate why has she been calling me Andrea then. Well, Kate later got [mad], calling me a brat for embarrassing her. She went on to say I knew who she was talking about and that I should have just gone with it but I was being an AH. I honestly kind of feel like in that instance I should have just answered to Andrea but I don’t know. AITA? – u/Complex_Eagle5873
I didn’t really want a gender reveal party, but my husband’s family made a big deal about it, so I agreed.
My mother-in-law was convinced that I knew the gender and insisted I tell her. I totally didn’t and I told her that fact.
She wore me down after a month of bothering me about it. She begged me and promised that she wouldn’t tell anyone. This was all in texts. I told her it was a girl.
I figured it was a 50/50 chance and it would get her off my back.
Well, she lied. When we cut the cake to reveal a blue inside there was a really awkward silence. She had told literally all of the guests from her side of the family so they could bring appropriate gifts.
My friends and family quickly gathered around to congratulate us on our son.
She came over and hissed at me that I made her look stupid. I reminded her that she had PROMISED not to tell anyone.
She said she had never promised so I showed her our text conversation. Some of [t]he family were right there when I did that, so they heard her admit that she lied and had never intended to keep that promise.
She said that it was a d*ck move and that I only did it to embarrass her. I again reminded her that I had told her on multiple occasions that I did not know the gender.
My husband wants me to apologize to keep the peace. I probably will but I don’t think I was an a**hole like she seems to think. – u/Fit_Tough1697
I (27F) have been the guardian of my niece (9) for almost a year since my brother and SIL passed away. I work full time in a relatively high-stress job.
Ever since I was 24 I’ve been on a low-carb diet. It’s obviously not for everybody but I feel better not consuming so much carb[s] and sugar – it helps with my weight, concentration, and energy level. My diet consists mostly of meat served with fruits and vegetables, but if I crave a slice of pizza or a helping of pad thai every now and then I don’t beat myself over it.
When [my niece] came to live with me, I made sure to have carbs for her meals, mostly rice and potatoes. I also take us out to eat once or twice a week so we can explore different cuisines and local offerings. She has lunch at her school and I give her a small allowance so she can buy whatever she likes within that budget.
What I don’t have in my home is dessert. I used to stock some when [my niece] first came live with me and would give her a small serving after her meal while I had some fruits. A few weeks of that and [my niece] asked why I didn’t eat any dessert with her, and I told her for me fruits are yummier and healthier. Not long after she stopped me from buying more of anything sweet when I took her grocery shopping and said she would have just fruits, too, like me. I tried to serve her some dessert we had at her next meal, but she refused. A few more times of that and I stopped offering and gave her fruits instead. [She] and I still enjoy dessert when we go out to eat (knafeh is one of our favorites).
A few days ago, a mom from [my niece’s] after-school club called me. She told me she brought butterscotch pies to the club and everyone enjoyed a piece, including [my niece]. A lot of kids left school early that day so there was a lot of leftover pie and she offered to pack it up for everyone there to take home. All the kids took some, but [my niece] didn’t and told her we don’t really have dessert at home.
She was concerned that I was setting [my niece] up for an eating disorder and that kids deserve to have something sweet in the house. I told her how it was [my niece’s] choice to not have dessert, so I just stop stocking them. I also told her I know [my niece] occasionally bought sweets at school, so there’s no need to add more sugar content to her home food. She said it was not right for me to set a low-carb diet lifestyle as an example for [my niece] when she’s still so young and should not be restricted from eating anything. Again, I told her that [my niece] can have anything she wants and I would gladly provide any food for her, but she argued that eating is a social thing and by seeing me abstaining from sweets, [my niece] would do the same to feel like she belongs.
I’m quite confused about this. I know from a rough nutrition estimate that [my niece] is getting what she needs. She is rarely sick and her martial arts instructor says she’s an active and enthusiastic student. I also don’t think I should compromise my own chosen diet so my niece can have dessert at home. AITA? – u/Lychee_salsa
I (29M) wanted to propose to my gf (28F). She’s a nurse, so she can’t wear rings at work. I wanted to give her something that she could keep with her all the time. I work as a graphic designer, so I designed a ring and a chain that I thought she would really… like.
The ring is in a style she’s worn before and likes, with a diamond, as well as opals, which are her favorite. The chain is fairly small and sturdy, and made of a stainless steel core with alternating gold and silver links over top, so it’s stronger. The clasp for the chain is invisible, and the ring can be clipped on and off of the ring without having to take the chain off. I made it so that she could turn it and hide the clip so she could wear the chain separately from the ring as well.
I thought it was really cool, and I proposed on Sunday at the park after Mother’s Day. There was no one else around to see it. She was initially excited when she saw it and immediately said yes. However, when she pulled it out and saw the chain attached, she accused me of trying to prank her, and wouldn’t hear a word in edgewise. She was yelling at me and crying, and I felt horrible. I tried to explain, and she shut me down and went back to her mother’s. Now she won’t talk to me and I don’t know what to do. AITA? – u/Bulky_Description556
I have recently started a higher protein and IBS sensitive diet, so I have had to make a lot of changes with my lifestyle. I’ve turned to fish as a main source of food, and canned tuna is one thing I enjoy a lot. I have started taking tuna salad to work with me every so often. When I take it to work I prepare it beforehand, so I’m not opening the can at work or anything, just eating it out of Tupperware.
One of the newer employees at my work confronted me recently for bringing the tuna salad to work because she can smell it when she enters my office apparently. To be clear the smell doesn’t waft into the public spaces, but when she’s dropping off papers or telling me something she can smell it. I explained to her my diet changed and apologized for the smell but told her I wouldn’t be changing my diet again right now as my stomach has a hard time adjusting to new food routines and this one has finally started working. She got pretty upset and told me that it was common office sense not to bring fish. I thought that that rule was always about microwaving seafood, not just bringing tuna salad, which i feel like is a pretty common lunch food. I feel bad that she doesn’t like the smell, but I really just need to keep with my routine. AITA? – u/throwaway29383820
My (22F) boyfriend (24M) was supposed to come… around 8 pm so we could have dinner together.
He didn’t showed up until an hour later and when he arrived, he was with a friend.
I greeted his friend and asked my boyfriend to follow me in the kitchen. I asked him why he was late and what was his friend doing here. He said that on his way home, he ran into the friend, they went to get drinks, and when he saw the time, he invited him to eat with us.
I asked why he didn’t [warn] me before allowing him to come eat with us. He answered he didn’t think it’d bother me.
When I told him that I didn’t [cook] enough for three, he said that it wasn’t too late for me to cook more for his friend.
I refused and said no, it is too late for me to cook more for your friend because it’s already close to 9:30 pm and I have to wake up early for work tomorrow.
He asked what was his friend supposed to eat then; I replied that he could either cook for his friend or give him my plate and then went to bed after saying a quick goodbye to his friend.
I heard the front door open and shut minutes later and I fell asleep.
When I woke up, I’d received a couple of texts from my boyfriend saying that my behavior yesterday was very rude, that his friend had felt unwelcome, and me being mad at him wasn’t an excuse for the way I had treated his friend.
I didn’t [reply], but now I feel guilty because I didn’t want to make his friend feel unwelcome
Update: Okay, so, surprisingly, it’s his friend who reached out to me; he apologized for coming even though I didn’t personally invite him and he shouldn’t have followed my boyfriend when he told him I’d be cool with it. I replied that it was okay, that it was just upsetting because it was supposed to be just us. He said he understood and apologized once again.
As for my boyfriend, we had another fight about it after I received his friend’s text, so yeah, this is probably the end of a relationship lol. – u/Klutzy_Ad_6927
This will sound ridiculous, but just stick it out.
Recently, my spouse, daughter (5), and I were having dinner together. He took some food off her plate to try a bite and she responded by shaking her finger and saying, “You need to ask!” He said, “I’m sorry, you’re right, I should ask,” and then a few minutes later, reached over to my place setting and took some of my food without asking.
I didn’t think it was a great example for our daughter, considering it happened moments earlier, so I said, “You didn’t ask. You just did the same thing to [daughter].” He said, “I assumed you were done eating.” And I said, “You assumed. But just ask me.” So he handed it back to me, said, “Can I have some of your garlic bread?” and I shared. Very calm, normal exchange.
Because this was a non-issue and I was not upset at the situation, we tried to use it in marriage counseling as an example of how to communicate in certain situations; mainly, when I say something hurt me and my spouse wants to explain how he experienced the event instead of apologizing.
It became an issue when he only wanted to give HIS side of the food story in counseling. Later that day, I asked him calmly again if he would like to share his side to see if it changes my perspective. I said, “I can’t argue with your experience since we both agree on what happened,” and to my surprise he indicated we did not agree. He told me he took the garlic bread from my place because he “got it for both of us.”
I knew this was nonsense as I order from this restaurant frequently and know how much garlic bread comes with the dish. I got insanely angry, because we argue constantly about how things happen, so I stormed off. Later, he came to me and said, “I’m sorry, I thought the garlic bread was mine and I was wrong.”
So by this point, I’d been told that he got garlic bread for us both, and then that he thought the bread was his. I felt crazy as I usually do when these conversations happen with him, so I thought to check the nanny cam to see what really happened.
He handed me my food saying, “And there’s garlic bread on top for you,” and then later, when I called him out for taking it from my place, he didn’t say, “This bread is mine?” or “I got this to share”; he said, “Okay. Can I have some of your garlic bread?”
I took these clips from our nanny cam and sent them to him, asking why he would lie about something so small and turn it into a massive thing. He immediately got mad and said, “I can’t believe you would do something as ridiculous as checking the camera. You’re so out of line,” and stormed off.
So Reddit, am I the a**hole/out of line for using our nanny cam to call my spouse out for lying? – u/Low_Environment567
My boyfriend and I belong to a local community center with a few basketball courts. Sometimes on the weekends we like to go there, just shoot around, and have fun.
Unfortunately, the balls the community center has are almost always slightly deflated for some reason. You can remedy this by either bringing your own ball or your own pump. Since I already have a pump for my bike, we usually just bring that and let other people use it too if they ask nicely.
We had the court to ourselves when a mom with her two 8- to 10-year-old boys arrives. No big deal, they can use the other side of the court. The kids started playing and were having trouble with the deflated ball. [The] mom, who was sitting and watching nearby, noticed this, and noticed that our ball was pumped.
She came up to us and said we need to let her kids have a turn with the ball we were using, since it was the only good one. I told her that they’re all always deflated and that we actually brought a pump to fix one so we could use it. I said she couldn’t have our ball, but she was welcome to use the pump to inflate the one her kids had.
She seemed offended by this and scoffed at me. “I supposed you’re not even going to inflate it for us?” I kind of paused because I was taken aback, but then responded.
Me: “No, I wasn’t, but I’ve changed my mind…“
Me: “Yeah, now I don’t think I’m going to let you use it at all.”
I turned back to my boyfriend and we started playing again, ignoring her stammering about how rude we were. The kids were watching the whole time and didn’t say a word. They started playing again too until the mom got frustrated with us ignoring her, took them, and left.
After they left my boyfriend said I went too far. He agreed she was rude, but said I should have let them use the pump because in the end it meant the mom got mad and the kids couldn’t play anymore. While I do feel bad for them, I wasn’t going to let their entitled mother steamroll me. I think that’s setting a bad precedent for both her and for her kids that they will all learn that they can just bully people into doing everything for them.
So AITA? – u/ElectricElk-224
Last Friday night I (37M) was hanging out with my daughter (10F) watching a movie. My wife (34F) was working late while our son (9M) was hanging out with his friend.
Around 8 pm his friend’s mom texted me letting me know that she was driving him home. I thanked her and then let my daughter know that her brother was on his way. She then suggested that we play a prank on him in which we jump out and scare him. I thought it would be a funny practical joke and – long story short – she and I ended up putting on scary Halloween masks, dimming the lights, and hiding behind a couch. I then texted his friend’s mom and told her that his sister and I were watching a movie and to send him to the family room downstairs when he got home.
He got home and came in. We heard him come in and say “Hello?” and then come down the stairs. When he got close we jumped out at him and shouted.
Now, here’s where I fully admit I messed up. I thought he’d just be startled for a second and then would laugh with us over the prank. But that’s not what happened. We ended up frightening him WAY more than I’d anticipated. He first started running off and then ended up having a HUGE, trembling, crying, adrenaline dump for a long time. I felt really bad and so did his sister.
His mother came home not long after and ended up sitting with him, hugging and comforting him. Naturally she wasn’t amused by my antics, which I understand because – again – I screwed up.
However, she has stayed mad at me for all these days afterward. She will barely talk to me. I eventually got tired of it and told her that she needed to get over it. I screwed up but I didn’t mean any harm. I just way underestimated how much our prank would scare our son. I also think that our daughter is seeing how she is treating me over it and is being made to feel way too bad over her idea that was just playful, not bad-natured. But she just says that I “should have known better” and won’t seem to forgive me.
I get it; she’s always been a complete mama bear. But it’s not as if I don’t love our kids, too. Was my prank honestly so beyond that pale that I deserve to keep being punished over it? – u/Small-Elephant9195
Hi everyone, I’m in a bit of a difficult situation and need some unbiased opinions.
Over the last couple of years, I have lost nearly 80 [pounds] through extreme dedication to dieting and exercise. It’s been a life-changing journey for me. The journey started when my doctors warned me about my poor cardiovascular health because of my unhealthy eating habits and lifestyle. With 30 right around the corner I couldn’t keep being the man I was before. It was a significant wake-up call. I tried immediately just focusing on going hard in the gym, but I tried lifting weights without eating properly and pretty much fried my CNS during deadlifts, causing me to pass out at the gym. It scared the hell out of me.
Since then, I’ve taken my health incredibly seriously. I prep all my meals and they are calculated to meet my nutritional needs for the day and keep a caloric deficit to have me on track for losing weight. I’ve avoided eating out at all costs, as it feels like a slippery slope back to my old habits. For me, restaurants are like relapsing on a drug. One bite of a cheesesteak egg roll and I’m buying Oreos on the way home and falling off the wagon.
My girlfriend has been supportive of my health journey but hasn’t joined me. She still cooks and eats as she did before, which is a lot of food covered in fats and sugars with a lot of calories. I’m appreciative of her cooking but I can’t eat the meals she makes most of the time. It’s been a bit of a strain on our relationship, but we’ve managed.
So, boom. The conflict arose on our anniversary last month. She wanted to go out to a fancy restaurant to celebrate. And, I wanted to make the night special as well, and I agreed to go. I even made sure I had calories leftover to have drinks with dinner. However, I didn’t want to break my diet and decided to bring a prepped meal to eat in the car before we went in.
She discovered what I was doing and got really upset. She called me an a**hole for not putting aside my diet for one night, saying I cared more about my food intake than about our special day. She said that I was being selfish and that I should have been more considerate of her feelings since it’s our anniversary.
I feel conflicted. On one hand, I understand where she’s coming from, and I didn’t mean to upset her. On the other hand, I’ve worked really hard to improve my health and I’m scared of falling back into old habits.
AITA for sticking to my diet even on our anniversary?
Edit: I’m 5’4″ and 297 pounds currently. – u/macroMacroMan29
My grandfather was an incredibly talented man who also suffered from paranoid schizophrenia, and he was convinced that the nuclear apocalypse was going to end the human race at some point, so he built his own bunker and then buried the entrance because he was convinced that both the KGB and the CIA were watching him and wanted to keep the bunker a secret. Yes, he was a crazy man. My dad inherited his house but never lived there, so when I had my first child in 2018 and got married in 2019, my dad made me an incredibly generous offer for the house. I bought computers that were more expensive than the house.
The bunker became kind of an urban legend, mostly because my old grandpa used to tell a lot of crazy stories, but out of curiosity I went looking for it and found the entrance. THE OLD MAN REALLY DID IT!
So, thanks to being stuck at home during the uneventful 2020 and 2021, I started remodeling the bunker to look less like a Fallout vault and more like my own man cave. Everyone loves it, especially the kids (my nephews and friend’s children). So the house is decorated to my wife’s taste, while I can do whatever I want in the bunker, play gaming, fix computers, set up a whole home server, work from home, etc.
However, lately she has been complaining about me being distant and spending a lot of time there and less time with her and our child. She is pregnant again, so she said she was worried, but I just promised to spend more time at the house. After a few weeks that wasn’t enough for her and she accuses me of abandoning her.
I’m asking for judgment here because I’m trying to be there for my family, but this bunker feels like it’s the only thing that’s really mine and where I can actually have a break, but my wife has said she’s going to seal the entrance; otherwise, I might miss the birth and not even notice. Should I just move all my stuff into the house and forget about it? Am I really being neglectful, or is this just her pregnancy hormones talking?
To be clear, I do help with the house chores and spend time with my son when I’m there and I have an intercom in the bunker so my wife can just call me if she needs anything and I’ll go up there immediately.
ETA: Everybody is asking me this. I spends at least six hours at the bunker on weekdays. I work there so I think [that] is reasonable, and at least four hours on weekends. But yeah, you’re right, I need to make arrangements.
I forgot to mention: Our son goes to kindergarten so my wife has time to work and sometimes be alone at home.
ETA 2: Guys, I swear I’m taking notes. I’m just trying to understand what I should change about myself and how to talk to my wife about this. Remember that I spend at least six hours WORKING, not scratching my belly. My manager allows me to log out early if I finished my work for the day, but [I] can’t log out if I’ve been working for less than six hours. I also spend time talking with my team on Slack.
ETA 3: So many of you are picking up on my language. I would appreciate if you explain calmly why my choice of words is so bad so I dont f*** things up when I speak to my wife.
Mini-Update: I had a talk with my wife. Overall I think it went well since she told me everything, but there are so many raw emotions right now and I was sent to sleep in the spare room. She had no mercy on me but we needed this talk so we can have a clear path for our future together.
I talked to my wife. I asked her to be very honest and I promised to let her talk until she was done. First of all, it’s not just about the time I spend in the bunker now, but she felt completely alone taking care of our little baby while I spent almost all of my free time remodeling and building and when it’s done I’m just down there. I explained to her that it was basically my office now; she understood and apologized and then continued to explain herself. I’ll just quote the gist of it because we talked for hours.
“I haven’t been my own person since my first pregnancy, I feel like a doll, every day is the same, I’m bored, frustrated, angry, just when I thought it might get easier, I get pregnant again, how many years until I can just be me again.”
“You have a big hole underground where you can play and not care about the word, I haven’t read a book in years, I can’t read two pages without falling asleep.”
“Yes, the house looks nice, but what about a place for me? I don’t want a Kindle, I don’t want audiobooks to listen to while cooking or driving, I want a PHYSICAL collection, where do I put them? When was the last time I went to a library? When was the last time you gave me something made of real paper?”
(For context, she’s always been a bookworm, loves books and the aesthetic of having shelves full of them, but it’s true she hasn’t read in a long time. I gave her a Kindle for our anniversary and I pay for her Audible subscription. I thought those would be good substitutes, but they’re not.)
“Stop thinking that a screen can solve everything, I need you with me, I married a human, not a Sim, download some emotions.”
“I want to write again, but how? When? Will you read my first crappy drafts or just take a look and say it’s okay?”
“Can you have our son in the bunker for a few hours a day? He’s bored here, he won’t be bored down there.”
It was hard, but I needed it, and she needed it.
I’m going to move my gaming consoles into the house and see if I can set up SteamLink to stream games from my gaming PC to our TV or something. We agreed to go on dates outside the house, and I’m going to take on more responsibilities around the house.
I want to address something. I was told by my parents that I had to “help” with the house, “help” with the kids. But then I come to Reddit and it turns out that “helping” is a problem.
You talked a lot about mental load. This was the first time I heard about it; who was supposed to teach me that? “Helping,” not having addictions, being loyal and always being there seemed like what every good husband does; now I realize it was just the bare minimum. I feel like I have to relearn everything, and it’s hard to realize that I’m a bad husband and father for thinking that the bare minimum was all I needed to have a long and happy marriage. I became a Reddit villain by being clueless, but I accept that.
I’ll see you again soon, thank you all. – u/ThrowRABunkerMan
My parents got married straight out of high school, had me (25F) right away and then split up when I was 3. But they stayed close friends till the day my mother died. My dad remarried [“A”] when I was 7; she had a daughter [“E”] (22F). Then they had our brother [“B”] (16M) together.
[“B”] was really sick when he was a toddler so our parents spent a lot of time at the hospital with him and I spent a lot of time at my mom’s house. [“E’s”] dad worked weird hours so my mom was more than happy to take [“E”] too most of the time. She loved hanging out with kids.
My mom was a talented and passionate artist and she was determined to foster a love of art in us. And she did for both of us, but [“E”] is far more talented than I am, and [she] and my mom bonded over their shared love of painting.
My mother passed away suddenly this January. I was always extremely close with her and I was and still am completely devastated. I still can’t accept that she’s gone forever… I miss her so so much. In late April, I finally got up the spirit to start organizing her things.
[“E”] approached me after I mentioned that I was going to my mother’s home to sort through some stuff and she asked me if she could look through my mom’s paintings and have a few as a keepsakes because my mother was such an inspiration for her.
I don’t want to and I refused. Not the paintings. I’m willing to give her clothes, jewelry, furniture, almost anything, but the paintings and journals are [the] closest things I have left to my mom. There’s pieces of her soul in there; it’s not just stuff. They’re the most personal items she left and I don’t want to let a single one go.
[“E”] got really upset and said she didn’t care about any of the other things either and she didn’t think she was asking for that much. She said my mother was an important person in her life and that they had a strong relationship. [“E”] believes… my mother would’ve left her something if she had the opportunity to decide.
I still said no and [“E”] went to her mom to complain, and now my immediate family is torn on the issue and arguing when we see each other. My dad understands but thinks I can give up one or two. And that I might change my mind in a couple years once the pain isn’t so fresh, and I do think that could’ve happened before, but [“E”] and [“A”] are pushing me so hard on it and being passive-aggressive towards me and I feel completely different about them now. We all used to be close.
I understand she wasn’t a stranger to my mom, but that’s just not enough to me. I think my own grief is bigger and to ask me for such a personal thing so soon after her death was insensitive. And I’m ever more upset that they don’t even see the irony of [“E”] sending her own living mother after me for my dead mom’s stuff. My boyfriend wants me to just give her one and repair my family so I stop tormenting myself, but I think I want to stand my ground here so AITA?
EDIT – I just wanna say this here because I’ve read a lot of comments about it, but this isn’t about jealousy of [“E”]. I can admit I was a little jealous when I was younger because I had ideas that I couldn’t properly get out and it seemed unfair that they could, but when I got to high school and discovered the medium that worked for me (film), the frustration I felt at not be[ing] able to express my creative thoughts properly melted away and the jealousy went with it. This is fully about what my mother’s paintings mean to me. – u/CulturalAfternoon313
Need some input on this one. My wife is upset with me about always correcting her grammar. Example:
We are watching The Office.
Wife: “I bet they’ll be making money off of this show for the rest of their life.”
She got angry and then cried and said that I correct her grammar a lot and she finds it condescending and rude and that I am treating her like a child. I didn’t see it that way, and feel that it isn’t really out of the norm to correct someone you’re close with, especially when it’s such a basic mistake. Also, she is a fourth grade teacher, so it is kind of her job to teach others proper grammar.
So, AITA…? Should I just keep my mouth shut?
Thanks in advance.
Update: So the consensus is I am the AH. I did apologize yesterday and apologized again this morning and will try to stop doing this in the future. Thanks to those who gave constructive feedback! – u/Historical-Fill8218