25 Cooking Disasters From People Who Don’t Belong Anywhere Near A Kitchen

I’m not the best cook, but whenever I want to feel like a James Beard award winner, I just look at some of the worst cooking fails known to humankind on Reddit.

It makes me wonder how many people don’t know the basics of food safety. I can overlook some of the presentation blunders, but I feel like I’m at risk of getting salmonella just by looking at these cooking fails.


1. “The way my sister thaws her frozen chicken”

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2. “Ordered a burger with a bean patty substitute. They substituted the bun.”

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3. “My dad calls this ‘cereal’ just cashews and blueberries drowning in milk.”

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4. “I fully heated this Hot Pocket and none of the filling spilled out”

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5. “This looks like a plate of food aliens who don’t understand human cuisine would give a pet human”

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6. “They did the monster mash”

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7. “Friend sent me this monstrosity: frozen pizza with imitation crab and whole green olives.”

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8. “Went out to celebrate an anniversary. A very fancy menu made this appetiser sound like more than a $28 ham and salami sandwich.”

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9. “My wife said if I came up with a bday cake, she’d bake it. Behold, jalapeño hotdog upside down cake. It’s not bad.”

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10. “$17 sad ass pizza my friend ordered”

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11. “So shitty on so many levels”

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12. “Tried cooking sausages for my bf”

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13. “‘Steaklet’ chips and beans. Yum.”

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14. “Is this a steal for $10?”

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15. “Acid battery spaghetti (energy drink and sour gummy strips)”

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16. “What in the Cajun hell is this monstrosity?!”

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17. “I quirled an egg into my instant noodles and it turned gray.”

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18. “‘Charcuterie’ at the brewery. I’ll stick to the beer”

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19. “I made bologna tacos with mashed potatoes”

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20. “A ‘donut’ with peas, carrots, and sweetcorn (an attempt to get a 1.5 year old to eat veggies)”

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21. “My jalapeño poppers look disgusting”

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22. “Made some pancake cereal today”

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23. “Dominoes took the bbq in bbq chicken pizza too seriously”

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24. “Chicken tender and coleslaw soft tacos.”

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25. “Bacon wrapped shrimps”

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Nate

Nate Armbruster

Nate Armbruster is a stand-up comedian and writer based in Chicago who is likely writing a joke as you read this. Find him online at natecomedy.com.