Mike
In a world where societal norms have long dictated that the ultimate fulfillment lies in creating a family and having children, a growing number of young people are boldly challenging this age-old narrative. Embracing the choice of a childfree lifestyle, they are steering away from traditional expectations and redefining what it means to find happiness and purpose. Yet, as more young individuals decide that parenthood isn’t for them, they often find themselves facing an unexpected hurdle – judgment from older generations.
Recently, TikToker Indianna Knight posted a now viral video of her and her husband dancing after getting a vasectomy. The reactions were pretty split.
“Something that I’ve realized as a female who doesn’t want children is no one will take you seriously. And I don’t know if this is just an Australian thing or not. But I went to the doctor and asked if I could get a tubal ligation and they flat-out refused. They said they wouldn’t do it until I’d had children, or I was at least 35. And I’m 25. I didn’t want to wait 10 years, but thankfully, my husband was very adamant that he would get the procedure done. He’s like, “you know, you’ve done your bit. You have been on birth control, it’s my time.” So he went in, he had to get a referral, went to the GP. He literally just asked. I said, “Do you know where to go?” He said, “Yes, they printed it.” And then he waited. It was about a six-month wait for him to get in. He went to see the surgeon on the day and they literally said, “Do you have kids?” He was like, “no, no.” Like, “oh, cool, loads of people are doing that these days.” Done. Now when my husband tells people that he doesn’t want children, they’re like, “why not?” And he’s like, “oh, I want to be rich.” You know, he makes a joke out of it. Not saying people with kids can’t be rich. He just makes a joke because personally, it’s not really anyone’s business. And then they go “Oh, okay, cool,” like they have a laugh. When I tell people that I’m not having children, every single person says, “Oh, but you will, just wait, you will” and I just can’t understand that, why is it not normalized that some people don’t want to have children?”
@indiannaknight Replying to @Smash Hope this helps 🤍
She shares the common responses most people have.
“These are the most common responses I get from people when I tell them I’m not having kids, and this is also what I think about them. The most common one is: “The love for your child is the most incredible thing in the world. And you’re really missing out. It’s so sad, you don’t get to experience this. Like, you want to.”
I believe you, I do, I’m sure if I had that experience, I would also agree, I truly do believe that it is out of this world. However, you can’t miss something that you don’t have, or you don’t know. So all of the people telling me this are telling me because they have that feeling. I don’t have it, I’m never gonna have it unless I have kids. And I’m okay with that. I genuinely feel like I have enough love in my heart. I’m so fulfilled with love for my husband and my pets, and I’m okay to leave it at that.”
“The second most common thing I hear all the time, it’s not the most polite thing to say. And there are variances of how rude people can be with it. But pretty much: “You’re going to be miserable. When you’re older, you’re going to die alone, and you’re going to be so unhappy and regret it.”
Now I would never have children for the sole purpose that they could look after me. If I did have kids, I would want them to be out there living their best life, traveling, feeling fulfilled, and I wouldn’t even expect them to live in the same town as me if they didn’t want to. So that would still be a possibility if I had kids, or if I didn’t. I know that I’m going to build such a beautiful network of chosen family and that’s enough for me.”
“The third thing is: “But what about your family bloodline? Your legacy?” I’m gonna be honest with you, my family doesn’t have a legacy.
We haven’t really done anything that exciting. And at the end of the day, my maiden name is Knight, Knight is such a common name. There are so many people that can carry that name. And I have my husband’s name anyway. So I’m exempt from that. And on my husband’s perspective, he has siblings that have already had children. So they’re doing that job for him. Not that it’s his job or not that he has to. But yeah, just for people that say that.”
“The fourth thing is: “Your family must be so sad.” And the reality is I know my mom would love grandchildren, but we’ve spoken about it and she has had her opportunity in life to make her choice. And she chose children and she respects that I don’t want them and you know what, she just ends up spoiling my dogs.”
“And the final one, probably the most frustrating, is: “You’ll change your mind.” No, I won’t, but to humor you, just to humor this comment, if I did, we can adopt because there are so many beautiful children out there needing a home, but I’m not going to change my mind.”
@indiannaknight If someone tells you they aren’t having kids, please don’t say these things 😅 #dink #childfreebychoice #dinklifestyle
@indiannaknight Dog parent and cool aunty for life 😎 #dink #childfreebychoice
Here’s what people are saying in the comments:
h/t: BoredPanda