Alex Buscemi
I don’t know about you guys but I had an eventful week.
I had to go in for surgery early Tuesday morning. Turns out the blood vessels in your body move around as you get older and one of mine decided to settle on top of a ureter, preventing my kidney from draining pee. So all that pee would just sit in there for way too long and I got a pretty gnarly kidney infection.
Anyway, the doctor used these big robot arms with little chopstick-looking attachments on the ends to move my organs around and now I’ve got a couple of cool new scars and a hydrocodone prescription (woohoo!). Needless to say today’s roundup of the funniest tweets is extra funny for me. I hope they’re funny for you too — even if you’re not on painkillers.
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Read More: 32 Funniest Quote Tweets You Need To See This Week