Nate
Some employees quietly follow the rules. Others… learn how to work the system like it’s a full-time side hustle.
A recent thread on r/antiwork asked people to share their most “unethical work hacks,” and the responses were bold, brilliant, and absolutely not HR-approved. These hacks blur the line between lazy and genius in a way that makes you question how anything ever gets done.
Here are the top “unethical work hacks” shared by employees who clearly figured out how to get paid without losing their sanity. Try them at your own risk. Or don’t. Definitely don’t.
1. How a Clipboard and a Frown Made This Person Untouchable in the Military
“When I was in the military, I always always walked around with a clipboard.
I had a terrible expression on my face, and once in a while, I looked at the clipboard and frown and shake my head.
People very weirdly ever bothered me.”
2. Look Busy Even When You’re Not: The Secret Power of Post-EOD Emails
“Schedule emails to send just after EOD. Even if you’re done early. Appear busy, not idle”
3. Send Smart: Schedule Emails So You’re Not “Always On”
“Better: schedule emails for within the workday because you should never set the expectation of working outside of regular hours.”
4. How to Look Busy at Work Without Actually Doing Anything
“At my old job, if I needed to pass the time, I would pick up a notebook, folder and pen and just go for a walk around the building.
As long as I held those items, moved at a reasonable pace, looked ahead, and walked in a big enough circle, it would look like I had someplace to be.”
5. The Ultimate Friday Power Move That’s 100% Honest (Technically)
“Reply with ‘Let me circle back Monday’ on a Friday at 4:59 pm. Technically, you didn’t lie.”
6. Doomscrolling for Professional Development
“Block ‘brand narrative alignment’ in your calendar.
Use it to doom scroll through LinkedIn, dismantling the meaning of work.”
7. Master the Art of Looking Busy, Even While Scrubbing Dishes
“Always appear ‘in a meeting.’
Especially when you’re not.
Especially when you’re cleaning your kitchen.”
8. George Costanza Was Right: Looking Annoyed Is the Ultimate Life Hack
“When you look annoyed all the time, people think you’re busy”
– George Costanza
9. The Secret to Looking Proactive Without Actually Doing Anything
“Send yourself a Slack reminder every morning that says ‘Check insights.’ Play Wordle instead.
Get praised for being ‘proactive with data.'”
10. Fake It Till You Make It: Weekly Reports That Run on Vibes, Not Data
“Send automated weekly reports even if the data hasn’t been updated in months. No one notices.”
11. What Happens When You Trap AI in a Group Project With Itself?
“Chain ChatGPT, Gemini, and Claude into a recursive feedback loop. Wait until one of them breaks.”
12. How to Sneak a Nap at Work Without Getting Caught (Kind Of)
“If you feel like a nap, go into the stationary room, scatter around a bunch of pens and fall asleep with your feet right next to the door (this only works if the door opens inwards).
If anyone opens the door it will slam into your feet, which will wake you up and you can pretend you’re picking up the pens which accidentally spilled over the floor.”
13. Stop Scheduling Teams Meetings Just to Be Alone With Your Coffee (or… Worse)
“Absolutely never create a teams meeting where you’re the only attendee two or three times a week and then sit on the call by yourself while sipping coffee or pooping.”
14. When PowerPoint Fails, Channel Your Inner Pharaoh
“Submit your next report in hieroglyphics, not because you want to be edgy or mysterious or even original, but because you understand, deeply and intuitively, that true insight cannot be flattened into bullet points or trapped in bar charts, that ‘content’ must be felt as much as it is read, that the symbols etched by ancient scribes carry more semantic weight than anything you could write in DM Sans 12, and when the client asks why they can’t understand any of this, you simply lean forward, fold your hands, and say, ‘The cake is a lie.'”
15. Break Up With Your Old Ideas: Call It Legacy Thinking and Move On
“Dismiss your own old strategy as ‘legacy thinking.’
Disagree with it vehemently.”
16. Make Your Next Slide Deck Feel Like a Philosophy Thesis Wrapped in a Vibe Check
“Create slides with poetic opacity. Annotate graphs as ‘The Lacanian Funnel’ and ‘Engagement as Simulacrum.’ Conclude with: ‘The data speaks for itself.'”
17. Block Off Time for “Deep Work”—Your Sourdough Starter (and Team Synergy) Depends on It
“Block recurring 4-hour ‘Cognitive Resonance Cycles’ in your public calendar. Use the time to perfect your sourdough starter. Explain it’s crucial for ‘cross-functional ideation alignment.'”
18. When Your Content Isn’t Just Bad—It’s Ontologically Hollow
“Refer to low-performing pages as ‘ontologically hollow.’ It’s not a bug, it’s a rupture in the symbolic order.”
19. How to Sound Smart Without Saying Anything at All
“When asked about project risks, solemnly state, ‘The primary blocker remains the heat death of the universe, but we’re tracking mitigation strategies.’
Log this in Jira under ‘Long-Term Impediments.'”
20. How to Become the Boss in One Bold (and Slightly Evil) Move
“B**g bosses wife, get her to divorce him, she‘ll win the company in the legal fight, marry her, be boss.”
21. Only the Clever Shall Rank: Riddle Your Way to the Top
“Submit SEO deliverables as riddles. If they can solve them, they deserve to rank.”
22. Turn Lazy Emailing Into a “Pro Move” With One Subject Line Trick
“Forward the same email thread back to the client with a new subject line. Call it an ‘upgrade.'”
23. Two Notion Boards: One for Productivity, One for Pure Vibes
“Create two Notion boards — one for show, one for go. The second is just a sticky note that says ‘vibes.'”
24. The Ultimate Google Sheets Power Move That’ll Keep Everyone Confused and Out of Your Way
“Rename your Google Sheet tabs to ‘do_not_touch’ and ‘client_facing.’ They are identical.”
25. How to Turn a Forgotten 2017 Blog Post Into a Modern Content Moat
“Pitch a ‘content moat’ strategy based on a blog post from 2017. It has no traffic. It FEELS authoritative.”
26. “Have You Heard of Larynx?” The Genius Fake Brand Strategy That Has Everyone Pretending They Have
“Invent a fake competitor brand named ‘Larynx.’ Echo everything they do. Nobody will admit they’ve never heard of them.”
27. How to Outsource Your Zoom Presence
“Clone yourself in Midjourney. Use the image in Zoom calls. Mute yourself. Nod solemnly. If asked to speak, type you’d ‘rather not to.'”
28. This Communication Strategy Shouldn’t Work—But It Weirdly Does
“End all comms with lyrics from obscure post-punk bands.
Bonus points if you still get replies.”
29. When “Do Not Touch” Is Just a Suggestion: A Quarterly Battle With Excel and Curious Coworkers
“I have Excel sheets labeled do_not_touch and at least once a quarter I get asked by a coworker why it asks for a password and won’t let them make any changes.”
30. Confuse Your Boss and Inspire Fear: Try Data-Driven Surrealism
“Replace your analytics dashboard with an Absurdist painting and a caption that reads ‘Q5.’
When questioned, say it’s a new form of data-driven storytelling. Say nothing else.”
31. Why Everything Went Wrong? Blame the Jellyfish in Charge
“Blame the Jellyfish. The one in charge of approvals.”
32. Meet Mr. K: The Stakeholder Who Speaks Only in Parables and Disapproval
“Invent a perpetual stakeholder named ‘Mr. K’ who has concerns about everything. He doesn’t approve. He doesn’t offer feedback. Mr. K offers parables.”
33. Try This Unhinged Email Signature Trick That’ll Leave Your Coworkers Wondering If You’re Okay
“Configure your email signature to randomly append one of three phrases: ‘Sent from my Ouija board,’ ‘Dictated but not read, possibly by a badger,’ or ‘This message will self-detonate upon comprehension.’ Feign ignorace if questioned.”
34. When in Doubt, Just Drop the Jargon and a Link
“Reply to any request under $500 with, ‘Per the Q2 mandate, please submit this via the Asynchronous Value Request Portal for impact assessment.’ The portal is a hyperlink that leads back to the company’s homepage.”
35. Stay Active Without Lifting a Finger: Use Jiggler to Keep Your MacBook Awake at Work
“Enable stealth mode on your MacBook for work and use Jiggler.”