Masha
Once you hit 30, the pressure to fake it just kind of fizzles out.
Maybe it’s the added life experience or just the realization that time is way too precious to spend pretending to like things that actually annoy you.
Whether it’s uncomfortable clothes, forced socializing, or putting up with other people’s drama, plenty of women hit a point where they just stop caring about appearances and start leaning into what actually makes them happy.
Here are a few brutally honest confessions on Reddit from women who finally dropped the act.
1.
High heels. I’m not f****n doin it.
2.
Other people’s kids.
3.
Socializing. It was always difficult for me, my “social battery” is extremely short lived. People just drain me, regardless of the setting and situation. I still tried to keep a network of friends and see them on a regular basis, but it was exhausting. After we all naturally drifted apart, I never sought out new friends.
I’m a homebody, with lots of animals, books, and video games. I don’t need anything else, so I’m finally embracing that and thriving.
4.
Books that I’m not enjoying. I used to force myself to read at least half of a book before deciding it’s not for me, but who has time to waste on something they’re actively disliking?!
5.
Live music at restaurants, especially when it’s too loud. If I’m getting up to go be social, I want to chit-chat with the people I’m with, not try and shout over what’s going on. (I’m a huge music lover and support artists and love to hear music when it’s the point of going out, but if I’m trying to grab dinner with friends and all of a sudden a guy with an amp starts setting up in the corner, I’m upset. This is just something I’m a grump about, and I totally understand I’m in the minority.)
6.
I don’t want to be in noisy environments anymore because it gives me a headache. I don’t want to communicate with people. I don’t want to tell anyone something twice (I don’t). My joint pains have increased, I don’t feel as energetic as before.
7.
After work functions. I’m a homebody, and I like being with my family more than my colleagues. Having kids means I can get away with saying I’ve got something on with them and no one thinks I’m being rude.
8.
I stopped pretending to enjoy spending time with people I don’t click with. A lot of my husband’s friends are nice people, but they’re not MY people. I feel drained hanging out with them. So I’ll still go every now and then, but I stopped feeling obligated to go for every single event.
9.
Alcohol! I never enjoyed it nor the effects of it. After 30, I just stopped drinking unless I really wanted one—not because it was the “social” thing.
10.
Passivity, being a ‘go with the flow’ type of woman. I speak up for myself a lot more now. I don’t let stuff slide anymore. If something bothers me, I bring it up. Just don’t care anymore. Let them think you’re difficult, too modern, aggressive, too this, too that. They don’t like accountability.
11.
Fashion over comfort. Give me an elasticized waist or give me death.
12.
Church and anything religious.
13.
Male attention.
14.
Staying for the full duration of social functions. I used to never leave things early unless I had somewhere else to be, and even if I was tired or not feeling it, I would still hang around to appear polite.
Now? When I’m not having fun anymore, I peace out. I can get tired and overstimulated pretty easily even among people I enjoy, so now I have no problem calling it a night when I reach that point.
15.
Men and coworkers. I can’t care less and would rather be home with a TV show or a book.
16.
Dating! I used to make an effort to go on the apps, etc. Took a break because of the pandemic, and then one year I decided it was going to be “the year” where I committed to finding someone; my goal was to go on one date per month.
I went on three dates and was so burnt out after each of them (like would come home and crash on the couch from having to be “on” so much), and finally I realized… why the f**k am I even doing this? I’m enjoying literally nothing about it. And if that means I’m going to be single for the rest of my life… then honestly that is completely fine with me.
17.
Being “chill” about things that truly bother me. I speak up for myself now more than I did when I was younger.
Also, salads. I’m so done with them. I hate them.
18.
Investing in people who don’t reciprocate your energy.
19.
Sleepovers. I want my own bed and my full skincare routine at my disposal.
20.
I no longer stay friends with people because of history, or because we have mutual friends.
If my friends have a problem with it, I tell them it’s okay for their friends to not be friends with each other. I am pretty well done with putting myself last all the time so other people can be happy while I feel absolutely miserable.
21.
Makeup.
22.
Dressing for others. Or rather, trying to consider what others would think of my outfit.
Now I just wear whatever the f**k I want.
23.
Staying out late. I love being home at a reasonable hour.
24.
Attending bigger group events, aside from rare occasions. I’ve learned to say no more often. If I’m not feeling it, I’m not feeling it.
25.
Putting up with friends who are their own victims. I can’t support the behavior of always needing to be saved when they will go right back to relapsing, not saving money, constantly couch surfing.
Let alone how they will treat me after all I’ve done. Yeah. No.
26.
Changing myself to be a certain way for each person.
Finally got a therapist that made me dig into my past and helped me start doing the work.I’m finally starting baby steps to growing into speaking up, not people-pleasing, and accepting who I am.
27.
People. I stopped trying to force being social with other people that I clearly didn’t care about and knew that they didn’t care about me.
28.
Talking s**t about my body / talking about losing weight. I used to participate, but now I just ignore the conversation until the topic changes.
I got skinny a few years ago—due to depression and stress—and it took me ages to get back to feeling healthy again, which included gaining 10 pounds.
I’m trying to like my body, thank you very much, and I will not participate in this b****t diet culture anymore. I am officially too old for this st.
29.
Being guilted into things. As soon as I realize someone is trying to guilt me into buying or doing something, I shut it down and walk away.
It’s 100% manipulation.
30.
Designer clothes/items. I felt the need to impress other women and didn’t know any other way.
When I got over the need for female companionship, I found myself staying away from all the pretentious b******t.
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