Jason Mustian
No one tells you how much of parenting is just narrating your child’s life back to them in real time. “You’re eating cereal. Yes, I see you’re standing on the table. Oh wow, you’re screaming at the window now.” It’s like you’re the unpaid color commentator for a tiny person who thinks they’re starring in their own reality show. And honestly? They are.
Parenting is a series of emotional whiplash moments. One minute you’re wiping jelly off the ceiling, the next you’re choking back tears because they said you’re their best friend. The house is loud, the fridge is always open, and every surface is sticky in a way that science has yet to explain. But then they fall asleep on your shoulder and suddenly you’re googling “how to preserve this moment forever.”
Of course, until that technology exists, we have parenting tweets. Little bite-sized truths that remind us we’re not losing our minds alone.
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