Nate
Reddit doesn’t always deliver on deep emotional insight, but every once in a while, a post slips through the madness and hits something real. That’s exactly what happened when a user on r/dating_advice posed what seemed like a simple question:
“Do you think your wife is still as beautiful as when you first met her?”
It wasn’t a bait post. It wasn’t a rage trap. It was someone genuinely looking for perspective after a conversation with her boyfriend that left her feeling… weird. And as it turns out, a lot of people had thoughts.
The Question That Started It All
The post came from u/Ok-Butterfly5825, who explained that a recent cuddly moment with her boyfriend took a turn.
She asked him the classic “will you still love me when I’m old and wrinkly?” question, and instead of a reassuring yes, she got something a little more technical.
“Are you still gonna love me when I’m old and grey?”
He made a face and said, “I don’t wanna think about that, I wanna think about you right now while you’re young.” Then he added, “I feel like you won’t ever get old looking, you have good genetics.”
Cue the uncertainty.
“I was expecting a ‘no matter what’ type of response”
The OP tried to steer the conversation toward something a little more heartfelt, pointing out that everyone ages, and love shouldn’t be based on looks.
Her boyfriend? Still focused on her skin and hair quality. He even suggested that maybe there will be future medical advancements to keep her looking young.
Not Quite the Romance She Had in Mind
“I was expecting more of a ‘I’ll love you no matter what’ type of response,” she wrote. Instead, she was stuck replaying a conversation that felt more like a skincare ad than a moment of emotional connection.
The Childbirth Curveball
Things only got weirder when they started talking about how her body might change during childbirth. She acknowledged those changes are natural and accepted them. Her boyfriend? He countered with, “Well, if women go to the gym, their bodies will improve.”
So now we’re in red flag territory.
The Final Ask
That’s when she turned to Reddit, asking men if they still find their wives beautiful, even after life, aging, and everything in between. And Reddit actually showed up with some thoughtful, heartfelt, and occasionally brutal answers.
Here’s How People Replied
The replies ranged from wholesome to blunt to low-key heartbreaking. Here are just a few standouts:
“Why is this conversation only about your aging?”
This top comment came from a woman in her 50s, who pointed out what many were thinking: Why is this only about you changing? He’s going to age, too. And she’s right. Why do women always have to carry the “will I stay desirable” burden?
“When people show you who they are…”
Reddit user u/xeandra_a dropped this no-nonsense reminder: “When people show you who they are, believe them.” No further comment needed.
“This response assumes too much”
Another user broke down the subtle issue: her boyfriend’s yes is based entirely on her never actually aging. One quote hit especially hard: “Don’t let him make you doubt there are men who think differently.”
“Listen to your gut”
User u/worrybones didn’t sugarcoat it: “He’s telling you he won’t accept you becoming less beautiful over time, which is a given.” The comment made it clear that if aging isn’t part of the love equation, something’s off.
“My husband still calls me beautiful at 60”
One commenter brought the wholesome energy we all needed. “Married 25 years, and my husband tells me I’m beautiful every day.” She even shared that her father told her mother she was beautiful up until she passed at 85. Actual goals.
“This is how mid-life crises start”
Another Redditor warned that this kind of superficial thinking can turn into a long-term problem: “This is the kind of man who leaves during a mid-life crisis for someone half his age.” Oof.
“This is a flaming hot red flag”
Finally, one user summed up what a lot of people were feeling: “If he can’t even say the right thing hypothetically, I wouldn’t want to know what his reaction would be when it actually happens.”
The Bar Is Underground
This thread wasn’t groundbreaking because someone asked a big, philosophical question. It blew up because this is the emotional bar in 2025, asking if your partner will still find you beautiful one day, and getting a TED Talk on collagen instead of comfort.
People aren’t expecting poetry. But a little empathy? A basic understanding that love isn’t tied to whatever’s happening with your pores? That shouldn’t be too much to ask.
Then again, maybe it is. Hence, the internet showing up to fill in the gaps.