Jason Mustian
I think about food constantly. Not in a gourmet way—more like “what can I eat that requires the least amount of effort but still gives me joy and a reason to exist.”
Sometimes it’s a slice of bread with butter. Sometimes it’s six pickle spears straight from the jar like a raccoon in emotional crisis. No judgment.
The internet gets this energy. These food tweets aren’t just about eating—they’re about surviving, coping, spiraling, and occasionally pretending that a grocery run counts as self-care.
1. This is actually just called vertical integration.
2. Fine, I’ll have a tomato juice.
3. Pigs in a…
4. Could be anything
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