The guy behind me honked because I was going 65 in a 65 so now we are both going 40. Welcome to Men….

40 Funniest Tweets From Women Who Deserve The Last Word This Week

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I’ve gotten better at keeping certain opinions to myself. Not because I’ve become more understanding, necessarily. Sometimes I just don’t have the energy for the follow-up questions.

That’s part of why I love reading funny tweets from women. Someone will casually post the exact thought I’ve been trying to put into words, then go about her day. Meanwhile, I’m still adding exclamation points to an email so “sounds good” doesn’t sound like a threat. These women deserve the last word this week. I clearly need another draft.

Here are the funniest tweets we saw from women this week, each making a strong case for letting them have the last word.

1.

Thought I had a lens wipe in my pocket and ended up pulling out and opening a packet….
via twitter

2.

At the ren faire and my dress keeps getting stuck in my butt crack and a lady just came up and said.
via twitter

3.

I don’t mind sharing a wall with my male neighbor but I hate hearing him laugh. What’s so funny, the.
via twitter

4.

Chase sapphire would be such a beautiful name for a baby girl.
via twitter

5.

My date of birth feels like a celebration to me. Whenever I see it written somewhere random, like on.
via twitter

6.

Me going through the group chat reacting to things i missed: hehe, yay. heart heart heart. heart y e.
via twitter

7.

My cat choosing to puke on the hardwood floor rather than on the carpet is a sign of great respect.
via twitter

8.

Adhd meds kicking in: what if instead of Doing My Midterm, i unsubscribe from every single email sub.
via twitter

9.

Too used to talking to my cat like he’s a human. I just told him “use the resources available to you.
via twitter

10.

Just drove my chevy all the way to the levy. you’re not gonna fucking believe this.
via twitter

11.

Man in apron smelling wine at a wine tasting, shelves of bottles in background.
via twitter

12.

Mom just called to make sure I didn't misinterpret something she said on a phone call 4 days ago, so.
via twitter

13.

Anything for you baby I whisper to myself as I make another reckless financial decision.
via twitter

14.

It has been 0 days since I accidentally downloaded the Zoom logo instead of joining the meeting.
via twitter

15.

I have deleted Facebook, which means I will no longer know who died fatter than I am, or later thanI.
via twitter

16.

Thank god for seat warmers in cars because keeping my pizza warm until i get home is literally their.
via twitter

17.

Gracie MacNcheese tweet about candy corn conspiracy theory regarding grocery store stock from 40-50+.
via twitter

18.

Doctor: How often do you exercise? Me: 3 times. Doctor: A week or a month? Me: I have.
via twitter

19.

Putting a magic spell on myself called i don't think about work when im not there.
via twitter

20.

I was on the train sitting on one of the fold-down handicap seats and I'm wearing a satin dress so I.
via twitter

21.

I love new jersey - woman tweets image of spaghetti muffins in display case.
via twitter

22.

A haunted corn maze, except what makes it scary are all the pesticides that are slowy.
via twitter

23.

Ever since i swallowed that airpod i have to stop and look at my meds for a few seconds before itake.
via twitter

24.

My brother added me to a group chat called 'one billion pints' where the goal is to collectively.
via twitter

25.

What happens with me and a roll of paper towels when I’m deep cleaning is between me and god.
via twitter

26.

Kendall Pennington tweet: 'uber drivers are addicted to being 6 minutes away'.
via twitter

27.

No you’re so right, why would I want to see a picture of a restaurant’s actual food when I could see.
via twitter

28.

Screenshot of a tweet by soup lover (@goodmorningssoup) stating: "instead of a 'for you' page there.
via twitter

29.

Anyone know how to dress for a low of 37 and a high of 84? Cooper Lawrence tweet with profile image.
via twitter

30.

The guy behind me honked because I was going 65 in a 65 so now we are both going 40. Welcome to Men.
via twitter

31.

Tweet by @tallsnail: someone offered my 3yo a piece of candy and he was like 'oh, i need to eat some.
via twitter

32.

Which ever creative director wins the most advertising awards this year should get to beat Liberty B.
via twitter

33.

I did not dream of a wedding as a young girl I’ve always wanted to be a detective in.
via twitter

34.

Living on a college campus is fun because you’ll run into problems it never even occurred to you.
via twitter

35.

Putting your hands all over your face and in your eyes is important after cutting jalapenos.
via twitter

36.

Sometimes you see a couple and you can tell they met at run club.
via twitter

37.

I’d rather drink old stagnant pond water than be asked to share a fun fact about myself in front ofa.
via twitter

38.

Someone microwaved fish at 11 a.m. on a Friday. I don’t know who it was, but Monday’s going to be их.
via twitter

39.

I decided that I'll never get down to my original weight & I'm okay with that. After all, 7 lbs. 5oz.
via twitter

40.

They should invent sinuses that aren't full of snot and pressure.
via twitter