15 Twitter Jokes Everyone Should Read

I’ve been on twitter for years and it never ceases to amaze me how every week I can find 15 new and amazing tweets to share with you guys. Enjoy.

1.

My personal style is best described as "didn't expect to get out of the car."

— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) February 16, 2015

2.

https://twitter.com/TheThomason/status/700032116868849664

3.

https://twitter.com/vineyille/status/670594077524529153

4.

https://twitter.com/SortaBad/status/835564250483478528

5.

If you get robot arms don't get the cheap ones [starts clapping for no reason]

— chip malfunction (@online_shawn) December 20, 2015

6.

https://twitter.com/GrowlyGrego/status/943151320650997760

7.

https://twitter.com/daplusk/status/935474960318939137

8.

https://twitter.com/KarenKilgariff/status/593148080725237760

9.

https://twitter.com/SirEviscerate/status/943137889977819138

10.

https://twitter.com/DanMentos/status/938112070762897409

11.

{first date}
him: i like a woman who knows when to break the rules
me: *breaks the second law of thermodynamics and decreases entropy until the universe is whole and right*

— rachelle mandik 🕳 (@rachelle_mandik) December 16, 2017

12.

https://twitter.com/FeralCrone/status/947273738151751680

13.

ME: mom we're out of eggs again!

MOM: it's ok, there's cereal

[later]

ME: *throwing cheerios at the mean neighbor's house* this sucks

— the hype (@TheHyyyype) December 28, 2017

14.

Sagittarius: All the stars will eventually burn out, leaving the universe in complete darkness for the remainder of time. Sorry, I can’t remember where I was going with this.

— Sorrow-scopes (@Sorrowscopes) December 28, 2017

15.

https://twitter.com/Barknado69/status/943851460986580993