21 Reasons You’re Going to Die in the Apocalypse
Let’s face it, when it comes to the impending apocalypse, you’re screwed. Here are 21 reasons why…
1. The only food that can survive an apocalypse has been discontinued:
2. And you’ve got to share your rations with these fellas:
3. And let’s face it, if it’s kill or be killed…you’re screwed:
4. You don’t own this zombie-proof house:
5. Or this super sweet death dagger:
6. So you’ll have no way to kill these things:
7. And don’t forget, you’re almost as out of shape as this guy:
8. Plus, superheroes have really let themselves go:
9. And the cops won’t be able to help you either:
10. Not to mention, this guy’s hogging the only phone that still works:
11. So, you’re on your own, which is too bad because you’re not agile enough to make a fast getaway:
12. I mean, you trip over your own two feet all time:
13. Also, this dog is blocking your escape route:
14. Which was mapped out by this “tech-savvy” lady:
15. And all the escape shuttles have already been reserved:
16. This spider means you won’t even be able to hit the emergency switch:
17. Plus, these are your escape pants and you don’t want to put them on:
18. So you’ll just stay home and get stuck Walken around the Christmas tree:
19. And cruising the Internet until the last possible second:
20. Until suddenly:
21. And everything goes black as the new world leaders take control of the planet:
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