15 Twitter Jokes Everyone Should Read

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17 responses to 15 Twitter Jokes Everyone Should Read

  1. Where do all these cranky internet women live where men are apparently constantly telling them to smile? The only person who’s ever told me to smile was a homeless man who was in a really good mood.

    1. i live in metro Detroit. My sister lives on the west side of the state. A friend lived in New York City and moved to Bangkok.

      Pretty much any time I’m in an airport and am distracted by getting to my gate on time I am reminded that it’s my job to smile like I’m simple.

    2. I’ve frequently been informed that I’m failing random men by not smiling for them. I’m sorry, I thought I owned my own face. Didn’t realize I was obligated to wear an expression a stranger I don’t want to talk to would find pleasing.

    3. They probably work retail. For the 10 years or so I spent working in retail, even when I wasn’t a cashier, I was told to smile pretty much every hour. Now my facial muscles are frozen this way, and people beg me to stop smiling.

      But there is no stopping. There is only smile.

    4. I’m a balding, overweight old man. No one ever tells me to smile. Usually they tell me to go away because I’m scaring their children.

    5. On Planet Earth. Where do you live that this apparently never happens to anyone of your acquaintance ever? Smallville, Nebrahoma?

      1. Where I’m from, people will do something to make you smile rather than demanding that you smile for them. And yes, I am from Nebrahoma. Go suck a lemon.

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