15 Twitter Jokes Everyone Should Read
15 tweets to make you smile and brighten your day.
https://twitter.com/thenatewolf/status/632674037253058560
https://twitter.com/SortaBad/status/724803840764051456
My dad taught me the importance of having convictions in life. Ten felonies later, I now know that some words have more than one meaning.
— greg (@GrowlyGrego) May 28, 2016
[Inauguration Day 2017]
Hillary: This is a momentous day for our country
Bill: Oh hell yea my secret Gushers stash is still here— oll (@dulcetry) June 8, 2016
https://twitter.com/hippieswordfish/status/760691303357227009
Colonel Mustard, in the Library, Googling how to spell his name
— nina treemonkey (@ninatreemonkey) May 20, 2013
Many years ago, in a tavern near hell, the worst people in the world all got together and invented work.
— Doth (@DothTheDoth) August 1, 2016
Therapist: let's look at why you feel like such a big dumb loser
Me: I didn't say that
Therapist [looks at notes]: well one of us did— David Hughes (@david8hughes) July 9, 2016
if i could have dinner with anyone, dead or alive, i would. i am very lonely
— jonny sun (@jonnysun) June 26, 2016
Enter password:
"ScoobyDoo"
sorry password must contain a special character
ScoobydooFeaturingBatman
— RollmanInOz (@Rollmaninoz) May 9, 2015
https://twitter.com/mikealfredcaine/status/724549937212452864
"How many volunteers do we have for my evil army?"
384 my liege
"Ok, round them up"
400 my liege
— Sean Leahy (@thepunningman) January 13, 2015
https://twitter.com/marth_burton/status/658354913701834752
The man who invented PIN numbers and ATM machines has died.
May he RIP in peace.
— Graham (@GrahamOfTheDead) July 18, 2016
https://twitter.com/RuthePhoenix/status/673772731800907776