Erotic Hieroglyphics: A Beginner’s Guide To Sexting With Emojis

Emojis truly are a modern-day hieroglyphics.

What started as punctuation to convey emotion can now be strung together to mean a variety of different things with ever using a single word. Including sexting.

Now, not everyone is fluent in emoji.

My mom, for one, makes some bold and very misinformed emoji choices. Often times she’ll end a text to me with 😍 thinking that means “I love you” when in fact that emoji should never be exchanged between family. To prevent any further confusion, I will now break down the sexting emoji combos and their meanings.

Let’s start with the big 3:

🍆 = penis

🌮 = vagina

🍑 = butt

There’s a lot you can do with just these, but If you really want to take your game to the next level, try some of these advanced combinations.

👌👈 = Good ol’ fashion penetration

🍑📞 = Booty call

👏🍑😊 = I want to smack your bottom.

Not to be confused with 👏🏼🍑 which means “I want to clap those cheeks.”

👅💦🍑 = Eating ass

In this year of our Lord 2019 ass eating has never been more popular…to talk about. You know anyone actually eating ass?

🙂♋️🙃 = 69ing

Again, not many people doing this one. What, are you in a hurry? Take turns and do it right.

🐓💍 = Cock ring

👫💪👶👦👧 = We would make powerful children.

❓☝️☝️☝️🍑😂🙌 = Could you put three fingers in my ass? Just joking, unless you’re into it?

🆗🐶👀❓ = Is it ok if my dog watches?

🍰🏸🤤🍝 = I want you to push cake through a badminton racquet and feed me dessert spaghetti.

Might just be me, but this is my thing.

🍆💎🇨🇳🔠🐝 = I’m harder than a Chinese spelling bee.

👊🔵🔵🔵🔵🍑😮 = I want to pull out your anal beads like I’m starting a lawnmower.

👐👨👇💀💦👣 = Choke me until I’m right at Death’s door so I can cum on his feet.

❌🏳️🔠☠️ = I don’t need a safe word, go ahead and kill me.

Look, sexting isn’t for everyone, but if your crush is, emojis are a fun way to meet them halfway. And hey, if you initiated and they aren’t into it there’s always room for interpretation. Maybe you were just telling them how much you like eating peaches. Pepper in some “lols” to show you were only joking. They’re still not buying it? Maybe you shouldn’t have been a fucking creep.

Good luck with these!

More Originals:


Mike Primavera

Mike Primavera is a Chicago-based comedy writer even though he doesn't HAVE to work. He lives comfortably off of his family's pasta fortune. Follow him on all social media at @primawesome