Nate
Maybe I haven’t been paying attention but some people have a real problem with people named Jessica. How many do you know? As I type, there are 7 people named Jessica in my contacts. I can think of many more than that and I can assure you I won’t be showing any of them this post.
1.
Spring Break Essentials:
-bikini
-beers!!!
-1 ghost named “Jason”
-17 tractors
-Jessica
-staircase
-real couches
-a boy named Brenda— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) April 2, 2015
2.
if my name was Jessica my only pickup line would be “say yes to the Jess”
— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) February 26, 2014
3.
y’all fall for this crap every year. and every year professional astrologers tell y’all to not believe this, but you still let a news article written by some girl named jessica who only knows her sun sign cause an ex boyfriend who’s ~spiritual~ asked her one night https://t.co/9MhUVCqOHw
— stay home (@ThomasBeautyy) October 2, 2019
4.
no one:
girl who won’t stop loudly sipping the melted ice in her starbucks drink that she finished an hour ago: my name is jessica but my boyfriend calls me a brat
— a (@brokeangeI) February 27, 2019
5.
I just saw the name Jessica spelled like “Gesika,” so I think I’m done with humans now. It’s been real.
— krispy (@KrispyTacoBelle) June 21, 2018
6.
just shotgunned a beer while wearing a ZTA shirt do any girls named jessica wanna go out with me
— Blake (@BlakeHunter_) July 8, 2019
7.
$10 to any the 1975 stan who’s name isn’t holly, olivia, mia, ava, sophie, jessica, emily or abigail
— ✟ (@Iizwgrant) June 29, 2019
8.
Girls named Jessica definitely know how to fight
— Notorious KGB (@kgb_notorious) January 8, 2019
9.
all cocker spaniels look like girls named jessica don’t ask me why that’s just the way it is
— (@madisutton) January 20, 2018
10.
I can’t wait to have kids so I can teach them lessons like how you shouldn’t pee into the wind and not to trust girls named Jess or Alexis
— Luke Lyman (@blameprometheus) March 30, 2015
11.
Why do all girls named Jessica like horses
— mikey (@notmikeydavis) March 20, 2017
12.
We all know a girl with a fake Michael kors bag named Jessica
— miri (@WeAllKnowA) November 14, 2015
13.
what’s your sleep style? like for instance I sleep like a starfish and my ex slept with a girl named Jessica
— clammy (@GawdOffalTweets) November 25, 2019
14.
girls who will absolutely ruin your life:
-girls with a septum piercing
-girls that wear chunky filas
-girls that don’t wear bras to class
-girls named Jessica that divorced me and took the kids and won’t even let me see them on Christmas
-girls that work at spencer’s— Beans After Dark (@goodbeanalt) August 22, 2019
15.
You know………I’m tired of meeting people named Jessica
— wavey davey (@JessicaNiles26) May 11, 2017
16.
when i asked my mom why she never gave me an american/european name she said “white ppl names dont mean anything. so many white men named rich. but are they rich? they are rich in nothing. they are miserable” and thats why im bao and not like, jessica
— Art Nouveau w/ Brutalist Characteristics (@aznbrutalistgrl) May 3, 2019
17.
too many people named jessica in my life y’all are gonna have to have a battle royale style match one of these days
— whatever u say, karen (@NireBryce) May 15, 2019
18.
Just finished watching all of Love is Blind. Are all you people really that bad at communicating? Also, anyone named Jessica is now dead to me
— robby boye (@The_RCS) March 13, 2020
19.
good morning to everybody except people named JeSsIcA
— (@armolauza) March 4, 2020
20.
I can’t believe that people are actually named “Jessica” your parents really must not like you
— Taylor Noonan (@taylor_noonan_) February 12, 2020
21.
I was walking up the stairs and heard some girl say “im gonna throw up” and her friend said “jessica shut up”. I didnt realize people were actually named jessica
— Blackout A (@ACupAlli) November 3, 2019
22.
I wonder how many people named Jessica Marie are on Facebook in total
— Nick Lakhotia (@nick_lakhotia) July 6, 2019
23.
For the record I hate people named Jessica and my name IS Jessica so you can all just take a damn seat.
— Jessica Kane (@jesskane31) June 13, 2019
24.
too many people named jessica in my life y’all are gonna have to have a battle royale style match one of these days
— whatever u say, karen (@NireBryce) May 15, 2019
25.
why are people named jessica so annoying?
— mar (@crybabykittens) March 29, 2019