28 Tweets From This Weekend That Will Make Your Monday Worth It

You were outside this weekend. Good. You put the phone down, touched some grass, made eye contact with another human being, maybe even ate a meal without documenting it.

We’re proud of you. Truly.

But here’s the thing — while you were out there living your best life, Twitter was unhinged, and somebody had to stay back and witness it.

Consider me your guy on the ground. Your embedded correspondent. The one who took the hit so you could enjoy your weekend unbothered.

I went through it all. The random observations, the chaotic shower thoughts, the tweets that have absolutely no business being as funny as they are. I sorted through the noise so you don’t have to scroll back through 48 hours of your timeline trying to find the good stuff.
You’re welcome.

Now sit down, relax, and catch up on everything you missed, guilt free.

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