13 People Share The In-Law Drama They Didn’t Know They Were Marrying Into
When you get married, you’re joining another family. Ideally, that means more people to celebrate with and somebody who insists you take leftovers home. Occasionally, it means discovering that your marriage has a lot of landmines to tiptoe around and hoops to jump through.
I think the basic arrangement should be pretty simple. Be nice, call before coming over, and let the people getting married decide who’s getting married. Somehow, even that leaves room for confusion.
These people shared the in-law drama they didn’t see coming, including wedding demands, unsolicited announcements, and relatives who seemed confused about whose relationship they were in. A few of these families could probably use a group chat with fewer members.
1. The Wedding Gifts Took A Detour
“Two years ago, my mother-in-law took our card box and gift box home from our wedding. In our culture, people often give gifts of either gold or money.
We had 600 people at the wedding. Apparently, she took it home and didn’t let us open it, saying, ‘It’s not safe at a hotel.’
I told my husband before the wedding even happened that she would do this. He cried the night of our wedding when he realized I was right.
But we never knew if she took anything because she gave us the boxes back after our honeymoon. We didn’t even have one-eighth of what we expected.
I recently visited them with my husband, and my father-in-law, who is now getting a divorce from my mother-in-law, told my youngest sibling-in-law, ‘Your mom took all of your brother’s gold and monetary gifts from his wedding.’
What I didn’t know was that she also took money from my son’s birthday party.”
2. Apparently, The Bride Had Competition
“We decided that for our wedding, we wanted our mothers to wear champagne-colored dresses. My mother found her dress a couple of months after we got engaged, but my MIL was a completely different story.
She waited out the two years to find a dress and said she ‘didn’t have enough time.
Finally, a month and a half prior to the wedding, she went to a bridal shop. My sister-in-law noticed the dress was white. She voiced her concern, but my MIL insisted it was the lighting and that the description read ‘champagne.’
My husband decided to casually mention the dress to his father. I overheard his dad say, ‘Oh, yeah, your mom has a great dress. She’s going to outshine the bride.’
My husband confronted my MIL, saying she couldn’t wear it. They went to the bridal shop, told her it was white, and asked to order a different color. She cried and complained.
She ended up ordering a different color, but was so angry that she didn’t smile once on our wedding day. In all of our wedding photos, she has a sour face. I can’t wait to get these printed and hung up for her to see.”
3. Grandma Arrived With A Job Termination Notice
“A few weeks ago, we found out I was pregnant. Our first baby. We specifically asked her not to tell our extended family, but two weeks later, she admitted she had because she was ‘so excited.’
My husband was so upset and told her she took that experience away from him, and he can never get it back.
Then, five seconds later, she asked if she could be in the room when I gave birth. He said no, and she went wild.
I was opening what I thought was my own Amazon order, but it was from my MIL. It was the ugliest onesie you’ve ever seen, and on it said, ‘Move over, mama, you’re fired! Grandma’s here!’”
4. He Tried To Keep Her Off The Golf Course
“My father-in-law corners me to tell me what my ‘role’ is in life based on my gender.
What is the point of a person cornering a woman and telling her she has no business working and should be home with the child so her husband can focus on his career?
Or saying that golf stands for ‘gentlemen only, ladies forbidden’ and trying desperately not to let me play with the group?
I did, and I beat the pants off him. I even used the men’s tees.
I’m being made to feel that I’m letting him get under my skin, and I should rise above it and laugh it off. But it’s not funny.”
— u/[deleted]
5. Helping With His Own Baby Was Apparently Suspicious
“Before giving birth, I thought I had the best mother-in-law, but nope. Her true colors came out after our child was born.
The most egregious thing happened recently when she phoned my husband and told him she has to protect him from me. Thankfully, my husband put an end to that.
Also, because my husband likes to ‘spoil me’ by packing our child’s diaper bag before we go out or helping with bottles, I’m taking advantage of him and need to do things myself.
Because there is no possible world where she raised a son to be a devoted companion and life partner. Nope. I’m just an evil witch who’s manipulating him.
He is in disbelief, and I am too. We have never seen this side of her.”
6. She Bought Herself A Familiar Ring
“My husband asked me about my preferences for engagement rings, then designed the ring himself using an online jeweler. It features an oval sapphire surrounded by a diamond halo, set in platinum.
When my husband decided to propose, he asked his mom for one of his grandmother’s rings. His grandmother had left several beautiful rings to my mother-in-law, but she refused to give one to him.
Two years into our marriage, my mother-in-law bought herself a very similar ring because she liked the style.
It’s an oval sapphire halo ring in white gold.
When she first got the ring, I asked my husband to please ask her not to wear it, at least when we were out together. However, she wears it all the time.
Recently, I noticed she had it on her left ring finger during lunch. It makes me want to take my own ring off.”
7. She Announced The Pregnancy While They Were Asleep
“My husband and I told my parents and his parents that we’re expecting our first baby.
My mother-in-law was excited, but made a comment about us telling my parents first. She said, ‘I guess we were the last to know.’
She knew that I was still anxious to reach the 13-week mark, and that we were going to tell a group of friends tomorrow.
We were staying with them, and my husband and I both went to bed. About an hour later, I got a few calls from my sisters, who told me my MIL had announced our pregnancy on Facebook and tagged us.
We got up, scolded her, and left. She said, ‘I thought you’d told everyone.’ She was then hysterical, saying she didn’t think we’d care. Then she took the post down.”
8. They Brought An Audience To An Uninvited Midnight Visit
“My husband and I have been in little to no contact with his family for about six months. His parents denied ever borrowing or taking money from us. It was supposed to be for a business, and they never paid us back.
Then they showed up here at 11:45 p.m., shouting outside, begging us to come out.
They even brought some cousins along, probably to pressure us into coming out. In the end, my husband told them to never visit again unless they’re invited.
My MIL fake cried, saying she missed her son and was upset we don’t visit anymore.
She’s also upset we had an elopement wedding. My husband got fed up and decided we’d get married without any of them invited.
I feel vindicated, too, since my husband didn’t give in.”
9. A Child’s Birthday Became A Dispute Between Adults
“My mother-in-law made us uninvite my father-in-law and his new wife to my daughter’s birthday party because she hated his new wife.
The following year, we decided not to do anything. However, his new wife wanted to do something for my daughter, so she invited us out to dinner at my daughter’s favorite restaurant.
She asked if we wanted to invite my brother-in-law, and we did. My brother-in-law told my mother-in-law immediately, and then the drama began.
At first, she was furious we didn’t invite her. How can I invite her to someone else’s party?
When she finally understood that, she demanded that we should have hosted a separate event for her.
She eventually cut me out of her life for good. But I’m not mad.”
10. The Wedding Needed His Approval And His Sermon
“My fiancé and I are planning our wedding, and we finally picked a date. This weekend, we flew into town to look at venues.
My fiancé went to his parents’ house to tell them. His dad is a pastor.
My fiancé told him we have our own pastor, and he just wants him to be a dad for a day. I want my own pastor because I don’t support his dad’s beliefs.
My fiancé’s dad left the house and didn’t come back for hours. His mom told him that his dad was mad that he wasn’t the pastor for the wedding.
Then she demanded that he would be the pastor or he wouldn’t go to the wedding.
His mother told him, ‘You need to be a man and tell your fiancé that he will be the pastor.’
I will not compromise on this. There is no debate.”
11. She Saved Her Question For Right Before The Ceremony
“My husband told me tonight, two weeks after our wedding, that his mother asked him if he was sure about marrying me right before the ceremony.
He didn’t tell me because he didn’t want to ruin our day or week since it was a destination wedding.
He told me after his mom asked if everything had been okay, since we hadn’t been texting her that much.
When he told her why he was upset, she said that she felt like a guest at her own son’s wedding.
We asked her to do stuff with my family and us multiple times during the trip, and they always made excuses.
She’s been awful to me in the past, so I don’t talk to her unless I have to anyway.”
12. He Wanted Their Friends Cut So His Could Come
“My future father-in-law asked my fiancé to cut our guest list so he could invite his friends.
His parents are divorced, and we set a rule that no one’s parents, even my own, are allowed to invite their friends.
My fiancé put his foot down with his father, and his dad just hung up.
We have a budget for 100 guests and are inviting 120, with the understanding that some may not be able to attend due to distance. This is just family, each other’s friends, mutual friends, and a few of our favorite coworkers.
My parents are covering the cost of the wedding reception. His mom will supposedly pay for the rehearsal, and his dad gave us $2,000 for the DJ and photography down payment.
My fiancé and I have to pay for the rest. The audacity to ask us to cut out our friends so he can invite his.”
13. The Reconciliation Came With A Threat
“We were no contact with my in-laws for a while because of multiple issues. Recently, my husband and I decided to meet up with them to try to smooth things over.
They didn’t acknowledge our hurt. Only theirs was important because they couldn’t see their grandson.
Instead of apologizing or trying to rebuild trust, they told us they were going to take us to court to try to get grandparents’ rights if we never ‘made up’ or went no contact again.
I was honestly stunned. We went there to see if we could repair the relationship, and their response was basically a threat to drag us into court over our own baby.
My husband says they just want to be grandparents and will do anything to get that, but to me, that sounds even worse.”