32 Weird And Funny Habits People Didn’t Discover Until They Moved In With Their Partners
I think moving in together should come with a 30-day orientation. You spend the first week figuring out where the plates go. The remaining three weeks are for discovering that the person you love has been doing something completely baffling their entire life and assumed everybody else was doing it, too.
I’m married, so I know there are things I do around the house that my wife would like explained in front of a panel. I also know I’m probably not going to have a good answer.
These people shared the weird habits they discovered about their partners, and I love how many of the explanations begin and end with “that’s how I’ve always done it.” A very confident defense from someone currently under investigation.
1. “Too Bad We Don’t Have Any Lettuce”
We were about to watch a movie, and he wanted popcorn. He said, “Too bad we don’t have any lettuce.” I asked if he wanted a salad; he said, “No, I want popcorn and lettuce.”
He said he never said anything at the movie theater because he knows they’ll never have lettuce. The man eats bites of lettuce and popcorn together. His whole family does.
I thought it was the weirdest thing, and his whole family said, “Yeah, we all eat lettuce with popcorn.” 😂 I felt like I was on Mars.
2. “My Husband Has Been Mispronouncing His Own Last Name”
My husband has been mispronouncing his own last name for his entire life. His mother says it differently than he does, as did his paternal grandmother. I joke that I have a variable last name.
3. “Dry. Tortellini.”
He will occasionally (usually when I’m not around to be appalled) eat dry tortellini straight out of the bag when he’s reading in bed. Dry. Tortellini.
4. “We Have City Water Service”
She has to have a kettle of water on the stove at all times. She rarely uses the kettle. It is in case the power goes out, and the well pump stops. We have city water service.
5. “She Uses Bing. Bing!”
She uses Bing. Bing! Like, what? I almost called off our wedding.
6. “Uh, I Think Your S.O. Might Be A Sim”
After washing the dishes, he goes to the bathroom and washes his hands. Both the kitchen and bathroom have hand soap.
Uh, I think your S.O. might be a Sim.
7. “She Stirs It All Into A Slurry And Eats It Like Soup”
She eats Oreos by taking a tall glass and filling it about three-quarters full with cookies, then she fills the glass with milk. After waiting for about 10 minutes, she stirs it all into a slurry and eats it like soup.
8. “He Takes Off A Single Sock”
He takes off a single sock a couple of hours before going to bed. In those hours in between, he will walk around the house wearing a single sock like a psycho.
9. “There’s Ice Cream All Over The Stairs…”
My boyfriend talks, yells, sings, and laughs in his sleep. I’ve woken up in a panic, thinking someone was breaking in because he had yelled at the top of his lungs, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!” just to look over seconds later and see him with his eyes closed and mouth wide open. 💀
I always thought that when movies or TV shows show someone talking in their sleep and they just spout random, silly nonsense, that it was mostly for comedic effect and wasn’t really a reflection of real life.
Nope. My partner talks in his sleep, and it’s always absolute random, silly nonsense. The most recent one was, in a tone of dismay, “There’s ice cream all over the stairs…” followed by a drawn-out, “Broooooooo.”
10. “It’s A Good Box”
My husband saves boxes because “it’s a good box.” It’s like he’s somebody’s grandma.
The worst disagreement my spouse and I had was when I took the liberty of recycling an empty computer box in the basement. I did not realize empty cardboard boxes are his most prized possessions, and it’s a major process for him to let them go.
11. “Our Microwave Is Called Alfredo”
He likes to give names to objects. Our microwave is called Alfredo.
12. “He Drinks Pickle Juice… Mixed Into Coke Zero”
He drinks pickle juice either by itself or mixed into Coke Zero.
13. “She Threw All Of Her Daily Contacts Behind Her Headboard”
She threw all of her daily contacts behind her headboard, and I don’t think she ever intended to clean them up because there were like 300 of them back there.
14. “He Sleeps Like A Vampire”
He sleeps like a vampire, sleeping on his back, with his arms straight by his sides or folded on his chest. Every. Single. Night.
Some nights he doesn’t even change his position at all. I was seriously concerned during the first couple of nights we slept in the same bed.
Oh my god, mine too. He sleeps propped up on like four pillows. He pulls the covers up to his chin, then puts his arms outside of the blankets, like someone who just died in a hospital bed.
He also doesn’t like his feet being covered by the blanket. He also drives with Google Maps oriented north. I think he is a psychopath.
15. “Oh, You’re One Of THOSE People”
The first time we both got out of the shower together, I used my towel and wiped down my whole body, and she said, “Oh, you’re one of THOSE people,” while she just stood there, basically dripping wet, and wrapped her towel around her waist to air-dry. Lol.
— [deleted]
16. “Like Living With The Little Girl From The Movie Signs”
Every single cup of coffee is left 1/4 full and left somewhere random around the apartment.
I tell my wife that living with her is like living with the little girl from the movie Signs because she’s always leaving not-quite-empty glasses of water everywhere.
17. “Just… All In There Together”
My boyfriend wanted to put all the cutlery straight into a drawer without any dividers between knives, forks, and spoons. Just… all in there together in a big, messy pile.
18. “Both Of His Arms Straight In The Air”
In the middle of the night, I will wake up to him having both of his arms straight in the air like a zombie. If I lie too close to him when he does this, I get a surprise mammogram when he inevitably drops his arms down in the night.
19. “She Eats Corn On The Cob Vertically”
She eats corn on the cob vertically, holding it as one would hold a banana, eating a layer around the cob, and then moving down.
20. “You Made Me Get Up Only To Go In And Take 30 Seconds?”
My S.O. sits on the toilet for an hour until he has a bowel movement. I, on the other hand, wait until my body tells me it’s time to go to the bathroom before actually attempting it. I thought that was normal.
He literally made fun of me yesterday for kicking him off the toilet. “You made me get up only to go in and take 30 seconds??”
Dude, you’ve been in there for 45 minutes, and clearly nothing was happening if you could just let me in like that.
21. “The Snot Shirt”
The snot shirt. When he gets any kind of respiratory sickness, he takes a shirt out, puts it on his nightstand, and blows his nose in it during the night. He says it’s cheaper and softer than tissues.
22. “A Semicircle Around The Front Door”
We have a shoe rack. He has never used it. Instead, he prefers to discard his shoes in a semicircle around the front door like a booby trap for me, his incredibly clumsy fiancée. I love him even though my life is constantly at risk.
23. “She’ll Give The Lid A Quarter Turn, Then Call It A Day”
She doesn’t fully close cabinets or lids. She’ll leave out a jar of anything (jelly, peanut butter, etc.) and give the lid a quarter turn, then call it a day.
— [deleted]
24. “He Would Run Around In A Panic Every Single Morning”
He was 37, and it blew my mind that he still didn’t have a go-to spot for his keys and wallet. He would just randomly place them around the house, never in the same spot. He would run around in a panic every single morning. Wild.
25. “He Makes Up Songs About Everything”
He makes up songs about everything he’s doing/seeing/thinking about. I know where he’s been in the apartment because he’ll make up a song about ketchup after he’s grabbed something from the fridge, or he’ll sing a song about CeraVe while doing his skincare.
The best part is that the thing he tends to make up silly songs about the most is me. I love him. 🥰
— [deleted]
26. “Opening The Oven MULTIPLE TIMES”
While I’m cooking, he insists on opening the oven MULTIPLE TIMES to check if it’s ready. Makes me homicidal.
27. “She Just… Makes Up New Ones As Needed”
She is capable of changing her sleep schedule whenever she wants. I’ve had the same sleep schedule for decades, and she just… makes up new ones as needed.
— u/Kavrae
28. “Socks Everywhere!”
Socks everywhere! In the bed, under the coffee table, stuck in couch cushions, in my car for some reason?? And not only him, but our children have also inherited this trait, apparently.
29. “The Amount Of Hair. Everywhere.”
The amount of hair. Everywhere. Stuck to everything. I don’t know how women aren’t bald with the amount of hair they shed.
And it always ends up in your butt crack somehow.
30. “He Bobs His Head When He Plays The PlayStation”
He bobs his head when he plays the PlayStation and is very focused. I recorded it in slow motion one day to show him. He apparently knows he does it.
I never knew until we got our SECOND apartment together. It gives me the ick, so I just go back to the bedroom because I can’t watch that nonsense. 😂
31. “My Partner And Their Entire Family Overestimate Their Hunger”
My partner and their entire family overestimate their hunger at every meal. They’ll always fill their plates to the brim with food, only eat half, and leave their plate near the sink without even disposing of the leftover food. It’s disgusting to look at those plates.
32. “How Unbelievably, And Almost Uniquely, Normal She Is”
How unbelievably, and almost uniquely, normal she is. She has no drama. No family issues. She loves people for who they are. She’s mild-mannered and kind. She loves animals. Like, she has ZERO unhinged.
We’ve never raised our voices at one another in our nine years together. Coming from 30 years of chaotic relationships, it’s still a little unsettling to me sometimes.
Like, we’ve been married for seven years now, and I still wait for the unhinged to pop up, but there very well may just not be any. She’s the definition of a breath of fresh air. Every day.