Mike
31.
32.
https://twitter.com/therealeatwood/status/615659444282724353?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.someecards.com%2Flife%2Fmemes%2Ftweets-about-god%2F
33.
34.
And God said unto Abraham, "j/k u don't have to sacrifice ur son but im seriously flattered u can kill this sheep instead and make me Uggs."
— Trevor S (@trevso_electric) May 1, 2014
35.
36.
And on the seventh day God look on that which he had created and he said unto it: "Fuck it, send."
— maura quint (@behindyourback) October 31, 2015
37.
38.
https://twitter.com/ColoradoUgly/status/668081638971174912
39.
40.
God: Babies will come out your vag.
Eve: …
God: You’ll feed them with your boobs.
Eve: …
God: …
Eve: Dude. All I did was eat an apple.— shauna (@goldengateblond) November 23, 2015
41.
42.
When God closes a door, he opens a window. And then a couple of tabs so he can toggle between various genres of porn.
— stephanie mcmaster (@Smethanie) May 29, 2015
43.
God said to Noah "Build me an ark", then He slipped and His big papier-mâché head fell off, and Noah saw He was Dave, who wanted a free boat
— pixelatedboat aka “mr tweets” (@pixelatedboat) September 20, 2015
44.
https://twitter.com/pakalupapito/status/572064755348873216?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.someecards.com%2Flife%2Fmemes%2Ftweets-about-god%2F
45.
Me: "Hey you forgot to close the door! Were you born in a barn?"
Jesus: "Yes."
Me: "Oh, it's you. Sorry, Jesus."
Jesus: "I forgive you."— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) May 15, 2012